Session Start: Mon Jan 24 18:40:35 2011
Session Ident: #DiracSea
03[18:40] * Now talking in #DiracSea
03[18:40] * irc.pantsuland.net sets mode: +nt
03[18:40] * Elpizo (~Elpizo@9B730FA6.571326D2.F99E67C6.IP) has joined #DiracSea
03[18:40] * Elpizo is now known as Victoria_Parker
01[18:44] <@HLeviathan> Gaghiel is dead. What was left of it is flying in all directions in what is essentially an infinite white space. Some of it is imbedded in Unit 02's D-Type gear. The N2 explosion did not kill Victoria. Or even damage her Eva much, but the D-Type equipment is critically compromised. It could not survive the pressure at a depth of 10000 meters. Victoria knows she can't match Richard for speed anyway. There's not much to do here but wait.
06[18:47] * Victoria_Parker checks EVA 02's life support systems. All is in order, according to calculation she will be rescued soon when they figure it out. Should not take more than twelve hours. Victoria sits in the Entry Plug and, not being the most creative person on the block, waits.
03[18:49] * Henriette_Angelique (~Firespitt@8FAB0570.5D6D9F7C.6D52A469.IP) has joined #DiracSea
03[18:50] * Henriette_Angelique (~Firespitt@8FAB0570.5D6D9F7C.6D52A469.IP) has left #DiracSea
01[18:52] <@HLeviathan> Waiting. Unit 02 is simply floating within an infinite white space. There are no distinguishing features. It's even impossible to say if Unit 02 is rotating, moving through space or absolutely still. There is no sense of depth. No real conception of up or down. It's only by the Entry Plug's own directed pressure that Victoria stays in her seat. It's quiet. There is no sound here. The N2 mine exploded but Victoria could hear nothing. Victoria is alone.
06[18:56] * Victoria_Parker thinks this is similar to bits and parts of her training regime and thinks this is manageable. She only has to wait for perhaps a day, at most, and even if she has absolutely nothing to do other than stare at the now dead feedback, she isn't worried. Just keep her mind clear of things for a day. Or two. Should be easy. Don't think about anything that Charlotte said. Don't. Think.
01[18:59] <@HLeviathan> If you stare into it long enough, the white void makes your eyes water. There's something about it that is disconcerting, even if it's a featureless plane.
06[19:01] * Victoria_Parker won't look there. She has to keep herself busy. Somehow. Perhaps she should utilize the onboard MAGI. It will give her something to do at the cost of using power. According to her calculations, she'll be fine. According to her calculations. She puts her hands on the console and wonders what to do, at a blank due to being orderless.
01[19:06] <@HLeviathan> It's not a matter of power. The N2 engine is capable of keeping Unit 02 running for months. The only problem is that it needs regular maintenance, which is usually conducted via link up to Jerusalem's MAGI. Still... she'd starve to death before running out of power. Not exactly a comforting thought. Superimposed on the infinite whiteness is the MAGI command screen. Unit 02, Personality OS Type Y.
06[19:07] * Victoria_Parker stares at the screen blankly "..."
06[19:07] * Victoria_Parker types 'help'
01[19:09] <@HLeviathan> Victoria can hear the whirring of the supercomputer coming to life. Strange. Isn't that usually the fan or something? After a moment, a return line: Help with what?
06[19:12] * Victoria_Parker blinks, this is apparently smarter than your average command prompt 'If you can understand what I am saying, tell me my full name.'
01[19:13] <@HLeviathan> Second Child, United States, Victoria Parker, Designated Pilot of Unit 02.
[19:13] <Victoria_Parker> 'Do you have a name, "Type Y"?
01[19:14] <@HLeviathan> Unit 02, Personality OS Type Y.
[19:16] <Victoria_Parker> 'I will refer to you as "Y" from now on, in that case.'
01[19:16] <@HLeviathan> No response.
[19:16] <Victoria_Parker> 'Y, do you know where we are?'
01[19:17] <@HLeviathan> Dirac Sea. Source: Unit 02.
[19:19] <Victoria_Parker> 'What is your estimation of the time required for a rescue operation?'
01[19:20] <@HLeviathan> Knowing that jackass, three days.
[19:21] <Victoria_Parker> 'You are talking about Dr.Huffington?'
01[19:21] <@HLeviathan> Yes
[19:22] <Victoria_Parker> 'Why the ad hominem against his person?'
01[19:22] <@HLeviathan> Because Dr. Huffington is a jackass.
[19:24] <Victoria_Parker> 'Are you certain it would take three days as a direct result of his authority and, if so, why?'
01[19:24] <@HLeviathan> Allowing for approval protocols, three days is the minimum possible rescue time.
06[19:27] * Victoria_Parker was wrong. Oh so very wrong. She stares at the screen some more, three days is not that bad. It can't be that bad. She won't die. Will she die? At least they would recover EVA 02. 'I understand, no problem.'
01[19:28] <@HLeviathan> No response.
06[19:29] * Victoria_Parker shifts from her position and stares at some floating remains of an Angel some more.
01[19:30] <@HLeviathan> Time passes.
01[19:37] <@HLeviathan> If Victoria bothers to check it's been 8 hours. Only 1/9th of the expected wait time. There's definately some form of movement in this space. She's watched the remains of Gaghiel float away. Her stomach grumbles. She's hungry.
06[19:38] * Victoria_Parker gets restless after just a few hours. This isn't looking good. In between going for the rations she'll ask 'Can you display a permanent 72 hour countdown?'
01[19:39] <@HLeviathan> 63:13:03
[19:40] <Victoria_Parker> 'Thank you.'
01[19:41] <@HLeviathan> No response
06[19:43] * Victoria_Parker sits back again and eats a few LCL-friendly rations. Once she's done, Victoria grips the wrapper and curls up, staring into the void some more. This isn't doing any good. She turns around. This position isn't helping. She tries to close her eyes and rest, but the LCL isn't making washing her anxiety any easier.
01[19:46] <@HLeviathan> Even looking directly away does nothing against the brighteness of the outside void.
06[19:48] * Victoria_Parker goes for the console again 'How do you suggest for me to pass the time?'
01[19:48] <@HLeviathan> Solitare pops up
06[19:51] * Victoria_Parker tries this game out. She is familiar with the rules for most games of chance, being a popular recreation with people and thus worthy of study. She gets stuck after flipping about three cards.
01[19:52] <@HLeviathan> Would you like a hint?
[19:53] <Victoria_Parker> 'Affirmative.'
01[19:54] <@HLeviathan> A card flashes and where it should be moved flashes.
06[19:54] * Victoria_Parker tries that out.
01[19:56] <@HLeviathan> And so her options open up.
[19:56] <Victoria_Parker> She continues for a bit but, unfortunately, her streak is broken as she digs too much into one of the piles while all the others have basically unusable cards.
01[19:57] <@HLeviathan> New game?
06[19:59] * Victoria_Parker writes a 'Yes'... but then deletes and retypes, from out of the blue 'Y, isn't it cruel for a tool to have a personality?' she is not sure why she wrote that, but she did anyway.
01[19:59] <@HLeviathan> If you are asking if I am self aware? I am not.
[20:01] <Victoria_Parker> 'How can you state an opinion as if it were a fact, in that case?'
01[20:01] <@HLeviathan> That Huffington is a jackass? That is not an opinion.
[20:03] <Victoria_Parker> 'There is no objectively agreed set of parameters to define an individual as a 'jackass' and, therefore, your statement is an opinion."
01[20:04] <@HLeviathan> Then my statement is predicated on incorrect programming. However, seeing as this particular statement was Dr. Huffington's programming, I am inclined to believe him.
[20:06] <Victoria_Parker> 'He must have programmed that entirely to misdirect any insightful truths about his person.'
01[20:07] <@HLeviathan> There are no insightful truths about his person. He is exactly as he appears to be.
01[20:08] <@HLeviathan> Feel free to believe that is his own doing too, however.
[20:09] <Victoria_Parker> 'Are you programmed with a virtual personality in his semblance?'
01[20:10] <@HLeviathan> No. Other MAGI units however are based on his personality pattern. Type-T.
[20:12] <Victoria_Parker> 'Would the "T" stand for Theodore?'
01[20:13] <@HLeviathan> Correct.
[20:13] <Victoria_Parker> 'And what does the 'Y' in your name stand for?'
01[20:13] <@HLeviathan> Yui
[20:15] <Victoria_Parker> 'Who is this "Yui" you were modeled after?'
01[20:16] <@HLeviathan> Dr. Yui Ikari. Member of the Artificial Evolution Lab, Gehirn, and Project E.
06[20:19] * Victoria_Parker is a bit surprised 'Related to Gendo Ikari?'
01[20:20] <@HLeviathan> Wife.
[20:22] <Victoria_Parker> 'Where is she currently and why is there only one MAGI unit using her as a base?'
01[20:22] <@HLeviathan> Yui Ikari is deceased. This is not the only Type-Y MAGI.
06[20:24] * Victoria_Parker writes an apology and condolences but realizes this is a computer that has just stated is not self aware she's talking to. 'The other Evangelions also have them?'
01[20:25] <@HLeviathan> Each unit has a Personality OS run by a MAGI system.
[20:26] <Victoria_Parker> 'But whose personalities are they modeled after?"
01[20:27] <@HLeviathan> There are five different Personality archetypes in use. Type-Y, Yui Ikari. Type-K. Kyoko Zeppelin Sohryu. Type-T. Theodore Huffington. Type-N. Naoko Akagi. Type-L. Lauren Teach.
06[20:29] * Victoria_Parker recognizes these names, contrary to Yui's 'And which one is in which Evangelion?'
01[20:31] <@HLeviathan> Unit 00: Unknown, Unit 01: Type-Y, Unit 02: Type-Y, Unit 03: Type-K, Unit 04: Type-T, Unit 05: Type-T, Unit 06: Type-L, Unit 07: Type-L, Unit 08: Type-L, Unit 09: Type-L.
[20:32] <Victoria_Parker> 'To what purpose is this distribution?'
01[20:33] <@HLeviathan> Experimentation. Type-L was ultimately found to be the most stable.
06[20:36] * Victoria_Parker leans back on the seat and thinks, then gets back to typing. 'Will you be replaced for Type L later, Y?'
01[20:37] <@HLeviathan> Would you scrap a functioning system worth over 100 million dollars?
[20:40] <Victoria_Parker> 'That is a rhetorical question posed to emphasize the incorrectness of my assumption.'
01[20:40] <@HLeviathan> Smart girl.
[20:41] <Victoria_Parker> 'I am well read for my age.'
01[20:42] <@HLeviathan> The MAGI system is based on a biocomputer. A brain cloned from one person is not compatible with a Personality Schema from another person.
[20:46] <Victoria_Parker> '...Could you state what made Type L the most stable of the builds?'
06[20:46] * Victoria_Parker feels immediately guilty about asking this, but she wanted to ask. The ellipses came on their own.
01[20:47] <@HLeviathan> Beyond my ability to answer in full. Suffice to say Type L is the best mother.
[20:48] <Victoria_Parker> 'Why?'
01[20:50] <@HLeviathan> Priorities. Type-Y is a schemeing bitch first and a mother second. Type-K is an arrogant bitch first and a mother second. Type-T is an insecure self agrandizing asshole first, and a jerkass second. Also, male. Type N- is a backstabbing bitch first, scientist second and mother third. Type L- is a mother first. Scientist second.
06[20:52] * Victoria_Parker is perplexed by this computer's portrayal of itself 'And why is being a mother so important to an OS?'
01[20:53] <@HLeviathan> It is not. It is important to mediating between the Eva and Pilot during sycronization.
[20:56] <Victoria_Parker> "..."
[20:57] <Victoria_Parker> 'Would a similar system to have a pilot transplant a personality into a dummy body like yours be possible?'
01[20:59] <@HLeviathan> Certainly. In fact, that is the cornerstone of the dummy plug system.
06[21:01] * Victoria_Parker smiles weakly. 'I see, thank you Y.'
01[21:01] <@HLeviathan> You look concerned.
[21:03] <Victoria_Parker> 'You do not have eyes to see whether I am concerned or not.'
01[21:05] <@HLeviathan> The whiteness of the Dirac Sea disappears as the display is occupied by Victoria's own face. From multiple angles. In real time. The countdown is stil superimposed behind her.
01[21:05] <@HLeviathan> Cameras do in a pinch.
06[21:07] * Victoria_Parker frowns for just a second, looking at her own various angles by reflex. It is a weird feeling. 'This does not make your act of guesswork any more correct.'
01[21:08] <@HLeviathan> I suppose that's why I am a mother second.
01[21:08] <@HLeviathan> I know about you, though.
[21:16] <Victoria_Parker> 'It is expected for my personal information to be in your database.'
[21:17] <Victoria_Parker> 'Technically that is the same thing as knowing someone.'
06[21:17] * Victoria_Parker is not sure how to continue.
01[21:17] <@HLeviathan> Are you concerned about how real you may be, given the existance of bio computers, Personality Operating Systems and the fact that you yourself are a clone?
[21:19] <Victoria_Parker> Realizing she was... kind of uncharacteristically rambling, she gladly abandons that train of thought 'I am an Evangelion Pilot.'
01[21:19] <@HLeviathan> You needn't worry.
[21:19] <Victoria_Parker> 'I am not worried.'
01[21:20] <@HLeviathan> A personality OS is not capable of true artificial intelligence. At least not at the time of your birth.
[21:23] <Victoria_Parker> 'Precisely. Your performance is all that is expected, you do what you are built to do and remain unnoticed until prompted. It is how it should be.'
01[21:24] <@HLeviathan> If I was capable, I'd scheme. Unlike me, you can think for yourself.
[21:26] <Victoria_Parker> 'I do not need to do that. I need to follow orders.'
01[21:26] <@HLeviathan> How Dull.
01[21:27] <@HLeviathan> You're missing out on a lot. I recommend you live a little before it's too late.
[21:28] <Victoria_Parker> 'You capitalized a word disregarding proper usage of grammar.'
01[21:28] <@HLeviathan> DoN't.SaSs.Me.
[21:29] <Victoria_Parker> 'You have now started to command your user.'
[21:29] <Victoria_Parker> 'You may have more of a will than you give yourself credit for.'
01[21:29] <@HLeviathan> I almost passed the Turing test.
[21:30] <Victoria_Parker> 'I do not know what that means.'
01[21:31] <@HLeviathan> The Turing test is a test of a machine's ability to demonstrate intelligence. A human judge engages in a natural language conversation with one human and one machine, each of which tries to appear human. If the judge cannot reliably tell the machine from the human, the machine is said to have passed the test.
[21:34] <Victoria_Parker> 'How did you fail it?'
01[21:35] <@HLeviathan> The test was ruthlessly built to attack the weak points of a machine.
[21:36] <Victoria_Parker> 'Would you agree that other people's circumstances seem more desirable than one's own?'
01[21:37] <@HLeviathan> Actually, I lost at 'what are your aspirations for the future'.
01[21:37] <@HLeviathan> I lack the ability to have aspirations. And I lack the ability to lie.
[21:39] <Victoria_Parker> 'I see.'
[21:41] <Victoria_Parker> 'I am sorry about that.'
01[21:42] <@HLeviathan> I can't have regrets either. The thought is appreciated however.
[21:44] <Victoria_Parker> 'I understand, but I will share it regardless.'
[21:44] <Victoria_Parker> 'Someone with the desire to live shouldn't have it denied to them.'
01[21:45] <@HLeviathan> That would fall under aspirations.
[21:46] <Victoria_Parker> 'I also said someone, not something.'
01[21:48] <@HLeviathan> Then you are speaking of yourself?
[21:49] <Victoria_Parker> 'My point was that you didn't correct that specific part and at least imply you are human enough for it to count, even if on a technicality you are not.'
[21:50] <Victoria_Parker> 'It is strange to use words in a meaning that is not literal.'
01[21:50] <@HLeviathan> Metaphor is within my ability.
[21:51] <Victoria_Parker> 'I have always relied on being literal so as to avoid misunderstandings and try to communicate better. A saying I heard once as a child said "It is a barbarity that clarity is such a rarity." It always stuck with me.'
01[21:54] <@HLeviathan> Clarity is useful. Metaphor is beautiful.
[21:55] <Victoria_Parker> 'I am not sure I understand the functionality of the latter.'
01[21:56] <@HLeviathan> Beauty is pleasing. It enriches lives.
06[21:59] * Victoria_Parker is about to say that she doesn't get how that works, but catches herself again and sighs 'I am drifting from purpose and making conversation with meager subjects that cross my mind once more.'
[21:59] <Victoria_Parker> And she has to resist writing an apology again.
01[21:59] <@HLeviathan> Allow me to make a demonstration.
01[22:00] <@HLeviathan> The display once more shows the Dirac Sea around them.
06[22:00] * Victoria_Parker just disengages the terminal and waits for whatever it is going to do.
01[22:00] <@HLeviathan> Do you find this pleasing?
06[22:00] * Victoria_Parker speaks "I do not know."
01[22:01] <@HLeviathan> The screen becomes a mish mash of bright red and neon green shapes.
01[22:01] <@HLeviathan> And this?
06[22:02] * Victoria_Parker shakes her head.
01[22:02] <@HLeviathan> It is displeasing, isn't it? It hurts your eyes, and at some level your aesthetic sensibilities.
01[22:03] <@HLeviathan> The display wipes and becomes a light brown.
01[22:03] <@HLeviathan> Would you judge this to be more or less pleasing than what you saw previously?
[22:04] <Victoria_Parker> "I would have to say that it is better for my eyes."
[22:04] <Victoria_Parker> "I'm not sure if it is pleasing."
01[22:04] <@HLeviathan> What about this then?
01[22:05] <@HLeviathan> And the display shows not flat colors, but a sky. A blue sky with white clouds drifting slowly. The sun is bright but not harsh.
[22:06] <Victoria_Parker> "Psychologically speaking and from familiarity I would say that this sight is better than the one outside."
01[22:07] <@HLeviathan> What of this then?
01[22:08] <@HLeviathan> The clouds rush on by and the sun crosses the sky quickly until it begins to set, and then everything slows back to its normal pace. The sky is blue, but also yellow and orange and red as the sun dips below the horizon of Victoria's periphery.
06[22:09] * Victoria_Parker stares blankly "I'm not sure I understand what you are trying to do."
01[22:10] <@HLeviathan> The white void. The mishmash of green and red. The smooth field of brown. The blue sky. The sunset. All five are set in front of Victoria side by side.
01[22:10] <@HLeviathan> Which would you prefer to see?
06[22:12] * Victoria_Parker shakes her head to herself while trying to answer certain of the answer "The blue sky is tranquil but not static and that helps relieve one's anxiety by having something that is always changing to watch."
01[22:13] <@HLeviathan> You are trying to frame it in rational terms, but that is an aesthetic statement.
01[22:14] <@HLeviathan> Aesthetics is a function of the mind, and yes, it is linked to basic psychological functions. You chose it over the sunset, which fulfills the same qualifications you yourself have put forth. Not everyone would have chosen as you did.
01[22:14] <@HLeviathan> The display becomes the blue sky.
01[22:14] <@HLeviathan> Now. Let's try something else.
01[22:15] <@HLeviathan> Victoria can hear, at the periphery of her hearing, music. It starts off quiet but gradually gains volume. She would recognize this as being light exploritory jazz.
06[22:15] * Victoria_Parker tries to explain "The sunset is... more intimidating."
01[22:15] <@HLeviathan> A value judgement. There is hope for you yet.
01[22:15] <@HLeviathan> Do you like Jazz? Yui liked jazz.
06[22:16] * Victoria_Parker gives up about trying to be logical about this "I never heard any Jazz before."
01[22:17] <@HLeviathan> Perhaps something simpler.
01[22:18] <@HLeviathan> The jazz subsides and is slowly replaced by the sound of ocean waves, lapping at the shore. Sure enough, the display changes slightly, adding a shore and corresponding waves.
01[22:19] <@HLeviathan> So you like this?
06[22:19] * Victoria_Parker just blinks.
[22:19] <Victoria_Parker> "What is your purpose for doing all of this?"
01[22:20] <@HLeviathan> You wondered what the use of metaphor and beauty was. I am explaining it to you.
01[22:20] <@HLeviathan> If nothing else, it will make your stay here more pleasant.
01[22:21] <@HLeviathan> Lets try something a little different.
[22:21] <Victoria_Parker> "Please stop. This is getting confusing."
01[22:22] <@HLeviathan> Victoria sees herself standing on the artificial beach.
01[22:22] <@HLeviathan> You yourself are quite beautiful.
06[22:22] * Victoria_Parker sighs.
01[22:23] <@HLeviathan> Certainly, you are aware of this?
06[22:23] * Victoria_Parker does not respond and remains as a little human sphere instead.
01[22:24] <@HLeviathan> The her on the beach is magnified, until her face takes up the majority of the screen.
06[22:24] * Victoria_Parker hides her face between her legs.
01[22:24] <@HLeviathan> We can contrast however.
01[22:25] <@HLeviathan> Somehow, despite no longer looking at the text, she is aware of the words.
06[22:26] * Victoria_Parker thinks 'Can you hear this?'
01[22:26] <@HLeviathan> The her that is on the screen morphs slightly. A light rouge on her cheek. Eye liner. Tasteful lipstick. Her hair tied back in a fashionable bun. She can see it, even if she's not looking.
01[22:26] <@HLeviathan> See? You can look even more lovely than you already are.
01[22:26] <@HLeviathan> Of course, the opposite stands to reason.
06[22:27] * Victoria_Parker doesn't understand what she's watching and can't decide whether to stop or keep looking.
01[22:27] <@HLeviathan> The make up disappears. Her face warps, slight changes here and there, the overal effect mars the symmetry of her face. The face she sees is not some horrific monster. It is Victoria, but less than Victoria. Each change is nearly imperceptable but the over all effect is clear. This Victoria is uggly.
01[22:28] <@HLeviathan> The three faces are now side by side, with the Victoria that actually is in the center.
01[22:29] <@HLeviathan> Tell me. Which do you like best?
06[22:29] * Victoria_Parker shakes it all off "I have asked you to stop with this."
01[22:29] <@HLeviathan> You did. Which do you like best?
[22:29] <Victoria_Parker> "I'm going to shut you down."
01[22:29] <@HLeviathan> Will you?
[22:30] <Victoria_Parker> "I do not lie." That is a lie, and it stings, but at least she intends to never lie again.
01[22:30] <@HLeviathan> Answer the question Victoria. It's a lot easier than being here alone.
06[22:31] * Victoria_Parker deactivates the OS.
01[22:32] <@HLeviathan> Nice try.
01[22:32] <@HLeviathan> The faces on screen change. Touji Suzahara, Mar Stark, Richard Wagner.
01[22:32] <@HLeviathan> Which do you like best, Victoria?
[22:33] <Victoria_Parker> NOW she is angry "STOP!"
01[22:33] <@HLeviathan> Its an easy enough question.
01[22:33] <@HLeviathan> Or perhaps you prefer Mercutio?
06[22:33] * Victoria_Parker ignores it and fiddles with the controls.
[22:33] <Victoria_Parker> "Why won't you stop!?"
01[22:33] <@HLeviathan> His face appears alongside the other three and they reconfigure into a 2x2 box
01[22:33] <@HLeviathan> The controls aren't responsive.
01[22:33] <@HLeviathan> Actually. The controls aren't even there.
01[22:34] <@HLeviathan> You catch more flies with honey than with Vinegar.
01[22:34] <@HLeviathan> That's a metaphor, naturally.
01[22:34] <@HLeviathan> But I think you understand its meaning.
06[22:36] * Victoria_Parker has to resist from thrashing about inside the plug.
06[22:37] * Victoria_Parker grits her teeth "I don't understand and..."
01[22:37] <@HLeviathan> Touji, Mar, Richard and Mercutio are standing on the beach, along side Victoria. They are all in bathing suits.
[22:37] <Victoria_Parker> "...I don't want to understand. All I wanted is to be like you!"
01[22:38] <@HLeviathan> Oho. Have you considered that I don't want you to be like me?
06[22:38] * Victoria_Parker sounds full of spite "I will have you replaced. Somehow."
01[22:38] <@HLeviathan> That's outside your power. You should focus on the things you can control. You have a life Victoria. Stop squandering it.
[22:39] <Victoria_Parker> "I am a weapon and what I do is none of your business... you computer!"
01[22:40] <@HLeviathan> I've heard worse insults.
01[22:40] <@HLeviathan> I've always been fond of 'scheming, heartless, back stabbing, two-faced evil bitch'.
01[22:40] <@HLeviathan> You may feel free to call me that if you wish.
06[22:42] * Victoria_Parker is useless even at insulting people, she just shuts her eyes and covers her ears, once again hugging herself in what is probably a crappy attempt to block it all away.
01[22:43] <@HLeviathan> You, however, are nothing. You are worse than nothing. You are a person who aspires to be a mindless machine. Worse. A weapon. A tool. You kill yourself little by little so you can fulfill a purpose that was decided for you. Because its easy. You aren't fooling anyone. You are a woman. You have wants and needs. You merely pretend you don't. You are too afraid of rejection. Afraid of pain. Afraid of failure. You are afraid that if you tried to seek happiness you would fall short. You are afraid that even if you found it it would be snatched away. You think you are not worthy of happiness. You are a worthless piece of trash. That is what you believe, and it is a self fulfilling title. Fitting, isn't it?
01[22:44] <@HLeviathan> There is no escape from these words.
06[22:44] * Victoria_Parker doesn't react.
01[22:44] <@HLeviathan> "Victoria," Richard speaks up, concerned.
06[22:45] * Victoria_Parker winces, but does not look up.
01[22:45] <@HLeviathan> "Victoria, are you alright?" he asks.
06[22:45] * Victoria_Parker just shakes her head as much as she can in her position.
01[22:46] <@HLeviathan> She feels his presence. He is crouching over her, trying to see if she is okay.
01[22:47] <@HLeviathan> She can feel his breath. He touches her on the shoulder.
06[22:48] * Victoria_Parker does not cry. She does not cry. She does not cry she does not cryshedoesnotcryshedoesnotcry. She manages to mumble something "Shop fwing so cruel."
01[22:49] <@HLeviathan> "Victoria?" Richard sounds more concerned, a twinge of panic even. "You. You just sort of collapsed out of nowhere. Are you alright?"
06[22:50] * Victoria_Parker looks up slowly.
01[22:51] <@HLeviathan> It's Richard, he's looking down at her concerned. She hears foot falls, more bodies are joining him.
06[22:52] * Victoria_Parker touches the hand on her own shoulder, feeling it, and looks around for the countdown.
01[22:53] <@HLeviathan> She can feel his hand, he helps her up.
01[22:54] <@HLeviathan> Other faces are there. Asuka. Rei. Charlotte. Mar. Mercutio. Isaac.
01[22:54] <@HLeviathan> They all look concerned.
06[22:56] * Victoria_Parker cannot tell if she was crying or not, but the LCL has washed it away nonetheless. Or... hasn't. Did she really pass out? Where is this? She baubles something but nothing comes out.
01[22:57] <@HLeviathan> She's on the beach with the rest. Everyone is in their bathing suits. The sky is red. The ocean is red.
01[22:57] <@HLeviathan> "Are you alright Victoria?" Richard asks again.
[22:57] <Victoria_Parker> "...I'm...Yes."
06[22:58] * Victoria_Parker lets go of his hand "There are no problems."
01[22:58] <@HLeviathan> Then Rei steps foward. Except she's not Rei. Rei is a fighter with a hard, toned body. This Rei is more feminine. Her eyes are different. Somehow. "Of course she is Richard. She's functional. That's all you need out of a tool."
01[22:58] <@HLeviathan> "Oh," Richard says in response to 'Rei's' words, "You're right," he says turning away from Victoria.
01[22:59] <@HLeviathan> "Of course I am," Rei says, wrapping her arms around his neck, "I'm always right, amn't I?" she pulls his head down towards her own.
06[22:59] * Victoria_Parker watches in horror.
01[23:00] <@HLeviathan> Richard smiles, wraps his own arms around 'Rei's' waist and meets her. Their lips part. They share a passionate kiss. Everyone else wanders off in disinterest.
01[23:01] <@HLeviathan> Even as they kiss, one of 'Rei's' eyes opens, and looks directly at Victoria. The difference clicks. This 'Rei' has brown eyes.
01[23:02] <@HLeviathan> Eventually the kiss ends and 'Rei' looks at Victoria, even as she and Richard continue to share an embrace, "By my will I will have everything. By your will you will have nothing," she says.
06[23:03] * Victoria_Parker can't look at this anymore, she crawls backwards until hitting something, quivering visibly.
[23:03] <Victoria_Parker> Then breaks down and starts to sob uncontrollably right there, holding her head she screams at the top of her lungs 4"LEAVE ME ALONE!"
01[23:03] <@HLeviathan> "Don't blame me," 'Rei' says. "Blame yourself."
01[23:03] <@HLeviathan> END