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Jun 28th, 2017
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  1. Tes: Hanging out with Mikes friends?
  2. me: Im home.
  3. Tes: Yes but overall. Are you still hoping you are getting back together?
  4. Me: Their my friend too lol
  5. Tes: Oh right
  6. Me: After three years you can consider them as own friends i think. And yes, I still love him and I think i will for a long while.
  7. Im still flabbergasted and see a future with him. But the feeling of hope is slipping away real fast so im just pushing forward.
  8. Its just a weird feeling that one moment he wants to get married and now he pushes me away. But if i hang out with people he knows and hes there
  9. i just say hi and let him do his thing and i do my thing and dont bother him. It doesnt have to be difficult
  10. Tes: I just think its weird if you still hang out with his friends but thats just me
  11. me: Well i dont think its that weird considering i have bonded with some of them. Then is weird if i just suddenly drop them
  12. Tes: Oh right. Well you make the rules.
  13. Me: I didnt know there were rules for this? You cant expect me to stay away from everything because my ex is somewhere there
  14. If people invite me over to do stuff i will go, because clearly they see me as a friend and want me there too.
  15. Tes: Its not up to me. I find it weird i never seen you with his friends
  16. Me: I go there alot but okay
  17. Tes: You dont have to explain yourself
  18. Me: Im just gonna do what i want. Do you find it weird i still talk to you?
  19. Tes: I have the feeling you are scared to lose me to Mike
  20. Me: What do you mean? You can be friends with both, thats not an issue
  21. Tes: Yeah but when im with you you talk alot about Mike and i talk to him alot so i dont want trouble
  22. Me: Yeah so. I just needed people to talk to, and i didnt want to talk about mike now
  23. Tes: Yeah but seriously thats the only thing we spoke about and i dont know if we have alot to share
  24. Me: Well i just like you as a personand would like to stay friends. Im done with talking about him
  25. Tes: It seems like you only need me to tak about him
  26. Me: Well. No. Because before we broke up we talked alot about other shit too
  27. Tes: yes but drunk
  28. Me: I just want good people around me
  29. Tes: Yeah but i dont wanna hear bad talk about mike
  30. Me: Well me neither
  31. Tes: And now i see you hanging out with his friends like you are doing it on purpose
  32. Me: Dude, ive been doing that for 3 years
  33. Tes: Not that it bothers me. Or Mike. But in the first place you were hanging out with Mike (NO FUCKING SHIT JESUS TES)
  34. Me: Yeah, well, on a certain point mike quitted hanging out with them, but when we were together there has been alot of tmes i went to
  35. them myself while he was home. Its not a big deal.
  36. Tes: But it seems like it
  37. Me: I dont do shit on purpose, i just wanna have a good time, and when people ask me out, i go. I dont wanna give the impression i do shit
  38. on purpose. I just do fun things for me
  39. Tes: Yeah sellfish. You should be
  40. Me: And for them
  41. Tes: But they are still his friends
  42. Me: Yes! And mine! Else they wouldnt invite me over
  43. Tes: Ah right
  44. Me: Can we stop this discussion now?
  45. Tes: Its not a discussion im just saying what i see lol
  46. Me: Its all not that bad hun
  47. Tes: Maybe its a good idea to keep some distance from his friends. But thats just me
  48. Me: Listen tes, dont worry about this. I really like you, i get what you are trying to say but leave it alone. I dont want drama, i dont want
  49. to talk about Mike, i just want to have a good time. I know the past couple of weeks i have been talking about him and me a lot and thats
  50. how i process and i get that for some people its annoying
  51. Tes: Well. I just think youre being weird.
  52. Me: If you wanna hangout sometime just hit me up ill leave it to you
  53. Tes: I dont want to.
  54. Me: Can i ask why not
  55. Tes: Because i have the impression you only reason why you hang out with his friends and me is to get closer yo him
  56. Me: Wow. Well sorry
  57. Tes: Oh you dont hae to say sorryy thats just how i see it
  58. Me: Fun.
  59. Tes: Well you arent denying it
  60. Me: Jesus thats what im doing to whole time here? "I dont wanna talk about mike" "I want to be friends because i like you"
  61. Tes: okayu fine then ill leave it
  62. Me: I hang out with you without muike being there, I dont give a shit if someone hangs out with him or not I just want you there as a friend.
  63. But hey, how am i gonna convince you? because then im suddenly more desperate. So basically everything i do is wrong and you'll probably
  64. have that feeling wether i talk about him for once or not.
  65. Tes: Yeah i dont know i dont wanna stand in between and thats whats happening wether its because of you or not
  66. Me: If you were standing between i would have constantly asked "What are you guys talking about" "Where is he" "are you guys fucking" "Did you
  67. see him" Jesus christ Tes what to you expect of me. I know im crazy nut im not fucking mental.
  68. tes: Calm down
  69. Me: I just dont wanna lose my friends. And you piss me off thinking of me like that
  70. Tes: I just dont want to be a puppet that gets ynked and has to choose a side
  71. Me: Well, you dont have to choose a side. You can have both you know.
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