This is the time when i just sit and think as i smoke
Wishing i was harry potter just hiding in an invisible cloak
and sometimes things get tough but i figure it out and cope
I have to strive to be better because i dont want to be labeled a the common folk
And this may have taken up to much of your time im sorry
but its feelings you get when you smoking with marley
And i cant call myself a pot head not even fucking hardly
Its just something i do because even emotions scar me
Even deeper then anyone could even ever imagine and see
How it is to live under a person who i am related to so closely
Because he is treated like hes made of solid gold
And im forgotten and treated like an acquaintance that is old
Possibly because my actions and personal satisfaction is to bold
When all i wan to do in life is break the fucking mold
Because being the only one they look down upon and hate
Is worse then living life without someone to remember your place
And who you are and could have been in this time and place
But you are just tossed around like broccoli on a fucking plate
with no chance of just receiving one hug
But they look at you and shun you like a fucking bug
Like they regret for even having a second son
Because he has different morals and see's things differently
Lets see after i jump if anyone will even look for me
Or after im gone and 6 feet under if they will ever visit me
Because living in a world with no fucking emotional support
Is worse then if my mother chose to just fucking quit and abort
And get rid of me before i built up an emotional fort
Where everyone is kept out unless you make yourself reach the port
Because im done, i am at the end of my fucking witz
Pop a bottle of perks until i get fucking sick
And slowly drift my way to darkness at the bottom of the pit
And even after i pass they will still be fucking critics
On how i didn't do it right and i didn't die fast enough
And how im a pussy ass bitch born with no nuts or guts
its to the point where im ganna grab the biggest knife
put it in as far as possible and spin it twice
so that i know for a fact my body has no chance to live or fight
and just let the blood pour out and accept the blackness as night
because there is no pont to live in a world where your not accepted or wanted
where your so called family left the biggest scars of you being taunted
and you are hardly even recognized while the golden child is flaunted
i dont want to be part of a group of people that are the fucking outcast
where i am like a mr cellophane and people just walk past
while he sits there with his egotistical self behind a 10,000 mask
it makes no sense in being part of a reality that you in no way have a say
of what will be done but you are just resented and quickly fall away
why is it that my life was full of colors and now is just another simple shade of gray
but this is where it fucking ends and i said my fucking peace
and i am done with all these bullshit lies like we love you, every little piece
because in actuality im resented from the top of my head to my feet
and the dog gets more appreciation and im treated like a piece of fucking beef
there is no point to go on and continue living in a house i despise with my every being
i want to rip my own eyes out but that still wont stop me from seeing
that i will always be on the bottom looking up at them peeing
happy with only themselves so full of glee they are gleaming
but its when i finally smoke that last blunt and remember all the times
that i wanted to just raise my chrome to my dome and finally blow my mind
and empty all my brain matter on the floor as one of them walks on by
then they yell at me for making a mess and shuns me for this crime
and now the time has come where i just pull out the pill filled with cyanide
take the pill with a shot of vodka chased with bacardi and i whisper as i say
"hey, no one gave a fuck anyway, ending 21 years of life is the perfect way to end this day."
as i relax i calm down start reach peace and then finally start to lay
i will finally be peaceful when i am piece by piece just fading away
And when they wake up in the morning and see me blue .... then what will they say?