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Crash reasons

a guest Jan 22nd, 2015 271 Never
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  1. static CString RandomCrash()
  2. {
  3.         srand ( time(NULL) ); //initialize the random seed
  4.        
  5.         const int crashes = 42;
  6.  
  7.         const CString crashReasons[crashes] = {"The error reporting interface is high as fuck.\n",
  8.                 ":(\n",
  9.                 "HOLY FUCK, ABORT ABORT ABORT\n",
  10.                 "The stepmaker did something dumb\n",
  11.                 "What you've just done is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever seen. At no point in your rambling, incoherent code were you even close to anything that could be considered rational syntax. Every actor in this file is now dumber for having compiled it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.\n",
  12.                 "Check the AV cables\n",
  13.                 "Scanner something error happened. ITG OPEN FAIL\n",
  14.                 "Hey! what are you trying to do?\n",
  15.                 "You've made a huge mistake...\n",
  16.                 "ITG has met with a terrible fate, hasn't it.\n",
  17.                 "THANKS OBAMA\n",
  18.                 "Dammit Shinji\n",
  19.                 "YOU HAD ONE JOB\n",
  20.                 "CALL 911!!!!!!!!!!!!\n",
  21.                 "NO CRASH RHYME, NO CRASH REASON\n",
  22.                 "how do you fell when lua is crash\n",
  23.                 "Everything is totally fine.\nNothing is ruined.",
  24.                 "He's dead, Jim\n",
  25.                 "Taro Owned Count++\n",
  26.                 "Nope, I'm out\n",
  27.                 "THIS IS MY CRASH DAY\n",
  28.                 "SMELLS LIKE A LUA FUCKUP\n",
  29.                 "Official seal of FUCK THIS SHIT has happened\n",
  30.                 "YOU HAVE DIED\n",
  31.                 "itg==PassiPolliisshhi\n",
  32.                 "roses are red\nviolets are blue\nitg has crashed\nfuck you\n",
  33.                 "Have crashed error reporting interface\n",
  34.                 "stupid game\n0/10\n",
  35.                 "bye guys\n",
  36.                 "STRANGE, ISN'T IT?!\n",
  37.                 "no shoes no shirt no simfile\n",
  38.                 "chair\n",
  39.                 "GO TO BED\n",
  40.                 "This is the wrongest you've ever got it.\n",
  41.                 "The error reporting interface clearly didn't try\n",
  42.                 "Man, I sure hope you saved!\n",
  43.                 "With great lua comes\ngreat responsibility.",
  44.                 "getting real sick of your shit taro\n",
  45.                 "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooo........\n",
  46.                 "I'll strap a firework to me butt and fly away\n",
  47.                 "Dis Version is way? from creation! Selassie I live\n",
  48.                 "What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that�fs just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little �gclever�h comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn�ft, you didn�ft, and now you�fre paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.\n"};
  49.         int r = rand() % crashes; //generates a random number between 0 and #crashes
  50.        
  51.         return crashReasons[r];
  52. }
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