Two bratty kids x each other C?

Bigwood May 18th, 2016 33 Never
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  1. [11:56:34] <Raitaki> hey tree
  2. [11:56:39] <Raitaki> i wanna supot(?) michelle
  3. [11:56:42] <Giantree> ok
  4. [11:56:48] * Raitaki is now known as Kotta
  5. [11:56:57] <Giantree> she hates your guts and avoids you at every possible opportunity
  6. [11:57:05] <Kotta> rip
  7. [11:57:48] <Giantree> Uhhhhhhhhh I guess she's not hard to find if you ask your loli, though
  8. [11:57:58] <Giantree> And your loli isn't hard to find, because you can just go to any place that has cake
  9. [11:57:58] <Kotta> kotta hates the guts of the army she works for and hunts her down at every possible opportunity (well ok maybe not in the baths)
  10. [11:58:02] <Kotta> l-lel
  11. [11:58:49] <Kotta> Yeah he'd probably be asking around about where she's """hiding"""
  12. [11:59:14] <Giantree> Hmm, yeah, turns out she's back at the inn you're staying at with the excuse of 'left [her] stuff there.'
  13. [12:00:26] <Giantree> And as hilarious as it would be for me to say 'yeah she's nude and screams as you enter her room without knocking,' no, bathing with a nasty-ass wound like that is actually fucking painful, so she has her armor on and is probably sighing wistfully at a picture of her oneesama or somesuch.
  14. [12:00:35] <Kotta> kek
  15. [12:01:14] <Kotta> Yeah no he knocks first 1,1so that she goes to the door to open it and gets in bind range
  16. [12:01:37] <Giantree> damn i read that as 'blind rage' for a second and i was gonna be like yeah that's exactly what's about to happen
  17. [12:01:58] <Giantree> Sure, though
  18. [12:02:11] <Giantree> She opens the door a crack, sees who's on the other side, and immediately closes it.
  19. [12:03:38] <Kotta> "Like that'd stop me! Yield, role scum!" Kotta started ramming the door with his Tornado...gently. Woouuuld not exactly do to bring down the whole inn.
  20. [12:05:07] <Giantree> "Don't even try it, you fiend!"  The shouting from the other side is just as """"""""""""gentle""""""""""""... by which I mean she stabs her Dragon Lance through the entire door.
  21. [12:06:18] <Giantree> wow i was about to comment on that thing being heavy as shit but it's only 12 wt, so just sort of average heaviness i guess
  22. [12:06:29] <Kotta> "Okay, if anyone asks, you broke the door first!" aww yis now time to just blow the door off its hinges completely guilt-free
  23. [12:07:34] <Giantree> "Oh yeah?  I'll break you first!"  And then the entire room gets wrapped up in a tornado and turned on its side and you fight each other while running on the now-sideways floor wuxia style as it soars through the air.
  24. [12:07:49] <Giantree> ... Okay not really, but there's a lot of angry yelling going on and the staff hasn't come in to stop it yet.
  25. [12:08:55] <Giantree> And the lancer gets to use the ENTIRE DOOR as a giant-ass shield, n a i s u
  26. [12:09:30] <Kotta> >giant-ass shield >more surface area >easier to push back
  27. [12:09:32] <Kotta> C|:^ )
  28. [12:09:38] <Giantree> .... yeah, true
  29. [12:10:47] <Kotta> .....yeah that's exactly what he'd do actually, ezmodo push her into the room and preferably towards the window
  30. [12:11:50] <Giantree> I was leaning more toward the 'wouldn't actually take the full force of hits from attacks' angle but I guess getting blown into walls would indeed hurt.  A lot.  Regardless, I know just how stupid freeforming combat can get because I grew up on the corner of the internet where people would do that all the time and every single fight would end in 'IT'S A HOLOGRAM' so let's just say you trash the everloving SHIT out of the room and get stabbed at a lot because it's a lot more difficult to fight someone with wind magic when it ISN'T super-effective against them.
  31. [12:11:51] <Kotta> "The hell are ya still doing here, anyway? Trying to buddy up with my companions? You role officers enjoy your backstabs, eh?"
  32. [12:12:06] <Kotta> oh
  33. [12:12:11] <Kotta> ok retcon that
  34. [12:12:15] <Giantree> nah it's still good
  35. [12:12:21] <Kotta> o-oh ok
  36. [12:13:44] <Giantree> Mimi is tired out and probably leaning against a wall of the trashed room now.  "Hell no!  I'm trying to get revenge against the one who killed my entire unit!  But the kid who killed my wyvern is a nice bonus too," she licks her lips.  But is also panting and wounded so it comes off like an empty threat.
  37. [12:19:25] <Kotta> "Heh...Revenge, huh? I've a bone to pick with you damn roles, too, so bring it on!" Despite all that, if this was actually freeform he wouldn't even have enough strength to both fight and keep trashing the room with wind (read: keeping Bind up). He actually didn't feel all that confident winning if he riled up Mimi-chan, so now he just stood there leaning against the nearest wall staring at her waiting for her move.
  38. [12:19:33] <Kotta> shit man
  39. [12:19:51] <Kotta> i accidentally inserted the meta of "never attack first in FE 1v1 unless to finish" into RP
  40. [12:20:01] <Giantree> nice
  41. [12:20:23] <Giantree> especially true here because her weapon is still technically brave, so if there were mechanics in this you'd be FUCKED
  42. [12:21:05] <Kotta> k-kek
  43. [12:21:45] <Giantree> But no, she's just as tired and limps over with her spear, ramming it in your direction, but ends up just embedding it into a wall instead.  Oh shit, that means her body's in the perfect accidental k-k-k-kissu pose, leaning over you menacingly.
  44. [12:22:19] <Giantree> And exhaustedly falling over forward...
  45. [12:23:07] <Kotta> haha no tomewhack
  46. [12:23:16] <Kotta> would be "tomesmack" but >implying sufficient str
  47. [12:25:05] <Giantree> Okay, I'm seeing this as you comically shove the tome in her face, which is going to be my headcanon for the rest of this.  But she's still leaning against her lance that is stuck against the wall.  "Y... You wanna finish this here?"  The soldier chokes out in ragged breaths.
  48. [12:25:58] <Giantree> ... NOW is when the lodge staff stumbles in, sees everything trashed and two people fighting, and calls for the guards.
  49. [12:30:43] <Kotta> Kotta staggered a bit sideways, righted himself and opened his tome, but grimaced in pain, paused, and grudgingly closed it as he heard people rushing in. "...Hmph. Pitiful girl. I'm not a child-killer, like ya filthy lot. This is a warning, try anything funny, and I'll show ya, how much wind alone can maim a person," he said in between raspy, irregular breaths, then stumbled outside back to his room, clutching his
  50. [12:30:43] <Kotta> abdomen. Not any of the spots he was actually stabbed in, though.
  51. [12:34:28] <Giantree> "S-Suit yourself, you bastard!"  I'd say that's it, but this is a meme campaign where everything has hilarious turnout, by which I mean the guards eventually come and the chick who was in Kri├če's room (which is the one that was just trashed, yes) has to explain that some dickweed came in and used high-level wind magic to fuck shit up, and they can find which room you're in because you didn't dispose of the only witness (Though I guess escaping out the window and living as a fugitive IS an option, but).
  52. [12:35:01] <Kotta> "she stabbed first"
  53. [12:35:05] <Kotta> "both me and the door"
  54. [12:35:44] <Kotta> "if you don't believe me look at it there's a gaping hole in it do i look like i carry any stabbing weapons or magic to y'all"
  55. [12:35:49] <Giantree> BUT, instead of ending up in jail or something, you'd both end up getting a scolding from the owner- yeah "he shot first" is the retort to that - and, on the realization that neither of you have enough money to pay for it, you both get forced to work alongside one another cleaning the spring for a day.
  56. [12:36:05] <Giantree> oh i guess there's also "HE'S FUCKING LYING LOOK AT HIM HE'S A WIZARD"
  57. [12:36:17] <Kotta> "S E L F   D E F E N S E"
  58. [12:36:26] <Kotta> "WIND MAGIC DOESN'T STAB YOU BROAD"
  59. [12:36:31] <Giantree> "YOU TRIED TO BREAK MY DOOR DOWN"
  60. [12:36:38] <Giantree> "AND THEN YOU DID"
  64. [12:37:26] <Giantree> You scream at each other in the middle of the owner's office like a couple of elementary school kids.
  65. [12:37:26] <Kotta> "YOU BROKE THE HINGES WITH YOUR SPEAR"
  66. [12:37:35] <Giantree> "I DID NOT YOU LYING SHIT!"
  67. [12:37:37] <Kotta> y e p
  68. [12:37:53] <Kotta> "I'LL FUKKIN' FITE U M8"
  69. [12:37:55] <Kotta> "DON'T TRY ME"
  70. [12:38:02] <Giantree> "ROUND 2?  OK LET'S GO"
  71. [12:38:08] <Giantree> ... all your weapons are confiscated by now, though
  72. [12:38:10] <Kotta> "OK"
  73. [12:38:14] <Kotta> brawl
  74. [12:38:16] <Giantree> like these are guards who frisk people for magic books
  75. [12:38:17] <Giantree> yeah ofc
  76. [12:38:18] <Kotta> 9 str gogogogogogo
  77. [12:38:31] <Giantree> I dunno man you're only going against like... 16
  78. [12:38:35] <Kotta> <3
  79. [12:38:35] <Giantree> oh, ignis though
  80. [12:38:46] <Kotta> ...what ignis
  81. [12:38:51] <Giantree> yeah, ignis
  82. [12:38:53] <Kotta> ....
  83. [12:38:55] <Giantree> yep
  84. [12:38:56] <Kotta> i'll put her in a hold
  85. [12:38:59] <Kotta> and call it cancel
  86. [12:39:00] <Kotta> C|:^ )
  87. [12:39:13] <Giantree> Man I don't even KNOW how to fluff ignis
  88. [12:39:30] <Giantree> ... But considering actual military training, she's probably better at chokeholds than Kotta would be.
  89. [12:39:30] <Kotta> martial arts
  90. [12:39:41] <Kotta> channel ki to enhance movements
  91. [12:39:42] <Kotta> ez
  92. [12:39:44] <Kotta> and kek
  93. [12:39:49] <Giantree> E I T H E R  W A Y there are like a fuckton of guards in here and stop that before it happens
  94. [12:39:59] <Giantree> And yeah, hilarious community service
  95. [12:40:08] <Giantree> ... during which you almost definitely keep fighting.
  96. [12:40:11] <Kotta> h e h
  97. [12:40:41] <Giantree> damn that's so anime, i'm trying to think of ways to make it animer
  98. [12:40:45] <Giantree> but i think that's the animeest it gets
  99. [12:41:10] <Kotta> well obviously
  100. [12:41:16] <Kotta> they also push each other into the hot spring
  101. [12:41:40] <Giantree> ... does that mean i can get my accidental k-k-kissu scene
  102. [12:41:44] <Kotta> p-plz
  103. [12:41:50] <Giantree> man i love those
  104. [12:42:51] <Kotta> .....shit
  105. [12:43:02] <Kotta> i briefly considered possible hook-ups for kotta across both groups
  106. [12:43:05] <Kotta> they're all fliers
  107. [12:44:24] <RedXVII> "I don't kiss boys i hate"
  108. [12:44:36] <RedXVII> that's
  109. [12:44:40] <RedXVII> what i should screenshoted
  110. [12:45:05] <Giantree> oh man yeah that one's perfect
  111. [12:45:53] <Giantree> Okay, no kissus, but you're forced into manual labor for a while during which you scare customers enough that they decide that's good enough to pay for it, because they don't want to lose business to some angry kids.
  112. [12:46:03] <Giantree> ... btw i think you're both exactly the same age actually
  113. [12:46:14] <Giantree> oh
  114. [12:46:16] <Giantree> no she's actually older
  115. [12:46:17] <Giantree> lmao
  116. [12:46:45] <Kotta> rip
  117. [12:47:11] <Giantree> Not that that fucking matters because even LILLI is older than him
  118. [12:47:22] <Giantree> kotta/lilli would be SSS+ ship btw
  119. [12:47:37] <Kotta> l-lel
  120. [12:47:56] <Kotta> too shota for this world
  121. [12:48:27] <Giantree> Okay well you people are interacting with this one-off unit who was supposed to die so much that there's basically no reason to not consider her a party member anymore, and that was the cutest fight i've ever seen so yeah consider that a /C
  122. [12:48:34] <Giantree> B will be you trying to assassinate each other in your sleep
  123. [12:48:49] <Kotta> whoa that escalated quickly
  124. [12:49:54] <Giantree> you think that's quick? 1,1A is her rivalry (read: love) declaration
  125. [12:50:22] <Kotta> >confession comes after angry s- sorry, nighttime assassinations
  126. [12:50:41] <Giantree> fire emblem?
  127. [12:50:45] <Kotta> l-lmao
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