Wolf GF is a bit territorial

You know, I'm still kind of surprised that you agreed to go out to this bar with me. It honestly is pretty loud in here. I want you to know, even if we don't stay very long, I'm proud of you for even coming to begin with. I know it's not the first place you think of for a Friday night. Here, you can sit at the bar, I have to go to the bathroom real quick and then we can find a seat, okay?

*pause*

[return to find listener talking to a flirty girl, note that listener is oblivious to this fact throughout the script]

[to self] Who is he talking to? [withholding anger] No... frickin'... way...

[walks up; seething, but fakes politeness] Hey there, buddy! Who's this?

Oh, Ashley! [or whatever name you want here] Well, it is *very* nice to meet you, Ashley. Why don't you say your goodbyes and we can go grab a seat, hm?

I'm not trying to 'claim' him, he's already--

[laughing] Okay, first, who are you to say that? And second-- you know what? You're not worth it; come on, let's go.

"Wait"? Oh, of course! You two should exchange numbers so you can text later! What a great idea, hun! Absolutely wonderful... [finish exchanging numbers; said very quickly] Okay, yes, cheers, great, goodbye! [pulling listener by the arm]

I looked like I was going to tear her throat out? Oh, I was.

[confused] Joke? [trying to cover herself] Oh, yes! Joke! Haha, that's meeee! Ms. Joker!

Alright, let's go find us a seat, ooh! There's a nice booth!

It's not *that* small; besides, we can be real close and keep each other warm~

I'm acting strangely? How so?

[badly covering up feelings] Protective? Nooo, what? Really? I'm not protective...

Then why did I pull you away? [trying to stay calm; agitated] What do you mean?

Yea, I did say I wanted you to go out and find new people...

And that I'd be here if you needed a break and someone to talk to...

How am I trying to *sabotage* you! I'm *happy* that you were able to get out of your comfort zone and meet someone new! It's just... [to self/quietly] why did it have to be a girl?

Do I not like Ashley? [trying to come up with some reason to dislike her + fails] Well, like... I just think... She's not-- [quickly] I just don't think she's going to be a very good friend for you.

I know what I said! And I *am* really happy for you. I-I just don't want you to be friends with her, okay?

It's not that she's a bad person! She's--

Oh, buddy, she's being a *little* more than friendly.

No, not "super friendly" she's-- [quietly] she's trying to take what's mine...

Nothing!

*phone dings*

Oh? Who's that? Oh, look! It's Ashley! She's a persistent little bugger, isn't she? Whatcha gonna say?

I'm not snooping! Look, if there's nothing you don't want me to see, why are you being so defensive about it? If anything, I can help you out! I can show you how to word things you want to say!

Phh, privacy, as if you don't do the exact same thing to me. You stare over my shoulder all the time!

Why am I doing it? I-- I'm worried about you is all.

*phone dings again* [bitter] Oh, wowww, she loves to use emojis doesn't she. Is that-- yep 8 hearts.

God, look at her... Sitting there so smug. Like she's won. Oh look she's wave-- [smacks listener's hand] don't wave back! You know, she is getting a *little* too cozy for my comfort.

Oh my god, she's giving you the eyes. You know what, here. I'm going to just wrap my tail around you like this anddd there! Perfect!

Why? Oh! I.. Uhm... Here! You can fluff my tail! [sing-song] ~I know you've wanted to for a while~

I'm not changing the subject!

Fine... [badly lying] I Uh.. thought you looked cold so I wanted to warm you up!

[listener stays silent waiting for the 'real' answer'] and... because *she* is still staring at you and *clearly* hasn't gotten the hint...

You know what, give me your phone. I need to send her a.. "cute little message" .

[texting; said through gritted teeth, almost growling] Back... Off... Mine... anddd send.

Aw, look at her face! She was trying *so* hard and was being *so* patient and the boy she was after turns out to be taken. [fake sad voice] How sad for her.

What? How am *I* the villain here?

I did *not* just ruin a friendship, hun; she was after something a *little* bit different.

"just being friendly" Oh no she was being *wayyyy* more than just friendly. She was hitting on you like no tomorrow.

How do *I* know? Oh, dear. Honey. Love of my life. I love you to the moon and back, to the ends of the Earth, but you are the most oblivious boy I have ever met.

Yes, that's why I got jealous! I was worried you were flirting with someone right in front of me and I got so angry and caught up that I forgot you probably didn't know what was going on. You were just being your happy-go-lucky self; just looking for a friend. You know, sometimes I wonder what it's like to live in your world. Where everyone is genuine, being so innocent...

I *wanted* to bring it up earlier, but, *sigh* I just got caught up in the moment and was too upset to think about anything other than being selfish and... treating you like you're mine and not your own person.

What? Why are *you* apologizing for something *I* did, hun? It's not on you; I know you weren't trying to encourage her.

Yea, I guess that's what I have to work on: not being so protective of you. I honestly should've expected someone to hit on you and should've warned you ahead of time...

So, uhm... What do you want to do? Do you want to stay here with me and just get used to the noise or do you want to go sit at the bar and see if someone chats you up? I promise that I won't be so aggressive this time.

You *don't* have to stay with me; I'm a big girl, I can handle my emotions.

You want to stay?

Alright, if you insist.

So! How was your day?