a guest Jan 14th, 2014 30 Never
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  1. by Cody Semroska
  3.  Dear Mom & Dad -
  5.  I want to share something about my life that is important because I love
  6.  you.  I am gay.  I have only known this about myself since I was 25.  In
  7.  the years that have passed since then, keeping this a secret from you
  8.  has become more and more of a burden.  It has also placed an invisible
  9.  wall between us in that I can not share with you much of what goes on in
  10.  my life, something that straight children take for granted.  I could not
  11.  share the excitement of dating somebody new nor the pain when things
  12.  didn't work out.  I have spent many nights crying with a broken heart,
  13.  alone, unable to call you for support.
  15.  I know that you may be feeling shocked, confused, angry, and sad; and
  16.  perhaps you might feel that, somewhere along the way, you have failed as
  17.  parents.  From what I have read, these are common reactions.  You have
  18.  not failed as parents; you have both been wonderful.  Nobody chooses to
  19.  be gay and I accept myself and am happy with who I am.  My friends have
  20.  known for some time and they accept me as well.  I hope that you will be
  21.  happy for me.
  23.  Part of me thinks that you might have suspected for some time that I am
  24.  gay since I never brought home girls while in school and I never talk
  25.  about dating or women now.  On the other hand, my being gay may have
  26.  come as a complete surprise to you and you may need to take some time to
  27.  get used to the idea.  Hopefully, a few years from now, our relationship
  28.  will be closer than it has been in the past.  This is part of the reason
  29.  I am coming out to you: to tear down the wall between us.  When we speak
  30.  on the phone and you ask me what is going on in my life and I say,
  31.  "Nothing," I have been lying.  I haven't been lying to deceive you, but
  32.  because I could not tell you the truth.  This lying has been eating at
  33.  me for some time now and I'm tired of it.  So this was the choice I had
  34.  to make: either keep lying and allow us to grow even farther apart from
  35.  each other, or tell the truth and hopefully have a better relationship
  36.  in the long run.
  38.  I know you have always loved me very much.  It was very hard to mail
  39.  this letter for fear of losing that love.  I have cried several times
  40.  while writing it.  Although you may not understand about being gay, I
  41.  hope that you still love me now.  Know that I am the same person now as
  42.  I was before you read this letter; you just know one more thing about
  43.  me.  I am still "Paul Jay."  When you are ready, you are welcome to call
  44.  me so we can talk about this more.
  46.  Love,
  48.  Cody
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