because some woman will get hurt and think men like her just for sex.


I've always thought about it that way. Haven't thought too hard about it. I guess being asexual does change the power dynamics in itself as well.


As [french essayist] Martin Page said, « If sexuality was a matter of pleasure, women would be less penetrated and men would be more ». So there is definitely a power relation there although sex acts don't have to be penetrative. The power inequality can maybe overcomed but still works as a set of default behaviours.


its different for everyone :)


The often unequal giving or taking of pleasure and sensation


One partner will never experience the same sensation/pleasure and in my own experiences and others I have spoken to, the second partners' needs are rarely met once the first partners' are.



It depends on the person and what they do


From what I heard from both sexes friends, men and women don’t expect the same thing concerning sex


Being a woman, there's a lot of pressure out on me to be available and able to please my male partners even when I don't want to.


some acts are just clear as day unfair and just not equal and is meant to only  please one person unless that one person loves only giving then its not fair.


Men ten to be more selfish, but that is because no one teaches us 1.) How to have sex the right way and 2.) we are brought up differently than women and that leads to much friction between the two of us both inside and outside the bedroom.
One who gains smth, one who gives/does smth



If you're with an allo who believes sex is mandetory for a healthy relationship, then you are set up for unfair/unequal acts that benefit only the allo. Completely disregards the ace in that setup.



It's impossible to have a fully fair relationship of any kind, and sex is no exception. There are always subtle social power-dynamics at play, and men also have more social power, generally. However, seeking perfect fairness at the expense of an individual's freedom to consent to sex is more unjust. The goal of pointing that out should only be to educate people on the dynamics of consent.



In a lot of situations (not all,) one partner gets most of the benefits



Because men do not typically have painful sex


Media/society seems to want to prioritize male pleasure


Men almost always orgasm. That's the end goal for them. Women are lucky if they get to have an orgasm. And so many men who claim to want to please their partner first think they're partner has orgasmed when they haven't and just go on to use her as a glorified semen depository.


Someone is always the giver.



toxic masculinity (often, not always)


No


PiV doesn't make most afab people orgasm and can often be painful and is at a greater risk to our bodies because of pregnancy risks that we are often expected to take primary responsibility for.



most acts of sex are done by one for one. i wouldn't call it unfair because i understand that there's a satisfaction some feel in giving an act, as if it's a gift. but i would call it unfair in that there's going to be a receiver and a giver, even in acts meant to balance things out.

But yes. Just not “inherently”


They aren’t

In practice, they tend to be, but it doesn't have to be. Good communication (before and during the interaction), and allowing one's partner to participate equally can help to make it more equal.


In most relationships it tends to be women doing most of the work for little to no reward. I'm sure people can be happy in allo relationships but it seems so rare that I'm generally dubious. More communication across the board all the time would be great, as long as I'm not included in the specifics



I answered no, but it's all in how the participants construct the interaction.

If women want to be the dominant one, it's instantly a kink or something. I don't think it needs to be unequal, I just think the majority believes it is, so it gets expressed as such. (Most of what I know is from bad porn, so I might be wrong.)

Sex I think can be different for each individual. Some like it a lot and some not at all. Some like it crazy wild and others vanilla. So I think it becomes unfair when you’re with someone who is on the opposite side of what’s too much or too little than yourself because one partner is going to have to compromise what they like or are comfortable with to please their partner after the arguments about it.


Because women can get pregnant.

Sex must be consensual, with consent coming from both(?) parties. Both must agree, so logically, it is "equal," as both(?) parties [should] have an equal say in the matter.

It is so easy for men to get off

They favor men and are locked in a binary

It's always presented as a dominance and a submissive role. It feels unhealthy to give someone else so much power during such a vulnerable state.