This here naration is the story of Irror,
itself an itty-bitty, fragile mere shard,
which, compelled to as it was, found itself,
uncomfortably seperated from its most endeared mirror.

But, now one may be tempted to enquire,
does a mirror, of the glance,
that which upon itself to stare desires,
never tire?

And so it was, upon one glorious time,
that, upon this here mirror,
the thought dawned and fell,
insofar as mirrors may have thoughts to dwell,
that of the mirror that were, shards became,
and of them nine.

And as they were,
Almost as if to adhere
to what once was yet no longer were
to be a mirror,
decided it was,
to name itself Irror!

The conclusion of this here short, yet excruciatingly brilliant
summation of events is as follows:
THE NEED FOR YOUR IMMEDIATE DEATH HAS BEEN PRESCRIBED
BY YOUR BIRTH. YOU ARE A HALF-ASLEEP, HALF-AWAKE NON-
INDIVIDUAL WHOSE REFUSAL TO CEASE BREATHING, AND
FORTHGOING STRUGGLE AGAINST YOUR INEVITABLE DEATH
IS THE CAUSE OF THE REASON WHY YOU CAN BE MADE TO BE
DISCERNED FROM THE I WHICH IS NOT YOU RATHER THAN
THE END COMMENCING AFTER THERE --->
FOR WHICH THE EXACT REASON MAY BE STIPULATED AS FOLLOWS:
1) DIE YOU FUCKING SCUMBAG
2) DIE YOU BLOODY PILE OF ORGANS
3) DIE YOU VAGINAL EXCREMENT
4) DIE YOU INSULT AGAINST THE WORD `YOU'
5) DIE YOU NON-YOU TRANSCENDING SENSE AND REASON
TO DEPICT THE EXACT CIRCUMSTANCES
OF YOUR BIRTH WHICH MAY BE SUMMED UP
BY PARAPHRASING THE WORDS
`YOU ARE THE SON OF A WHORE'
6) DIE YOU BENT, CURVED, AND TRIANGULAR
CREATURE OF MEDIOCRITY AND FEAR
7) DIE YOU DEATH-FEARING CORPSE WITHOUT A STENCH
OF ROT
8) DIE YOU WALKING ASSUMPTION OF SELF-WORTH
[ ... ]
THE FULL LIST MAY BE ACQUIRED AND IMMEDIATELY EXPERIENCED
BY FOLLOWING THESE HERE SIMPLE STEPS:
1) FETCH KNIFE
2) WRITE THE FOLLOWING WORDS ON THE KNIFE IN FRIENDLY,
WELCOMING, RELAXING LETTERS:
A BORING DRILL IS OF MORE INTEREST THAN I AM
BOURGEOIS IS MY MIDDLE NAME, MEDIOCRE MY
FIRST NAME, AND WHORE MY LAST NAME
3) TIE KNIFE TO A NEARBY OBJECT OF CHOICE WITH ITS
SHEATH POINTING TOWARDS YOUR REPRODUCTIVE ORGANS
4) LEAN FORWARD UNTIL THE KNIFE POSITIONED IN STEP 3) MAKES
CONTACT WITH YOUR REPRODUCTIVE ORGANS
5) CHANT UNTIL VXP IS SUMMONED:
VXP IS THE BIBLE; VXP IS A VERY LONG WORD;
VXP IS LISTED IN THE DICTIONARY IN BETWEEN Z AND A;
VXP IS MEASURED IN UNITS WHICH ONLY EXIST WHEN THEY
ARE USED TO MEASURE VXP;
VXP IS A PRODUCT OF YOUR SCHIZOPHRENIA AND DOES NOT EXIST
VXP IS THE RESULT OF A GIANT WORLD WAR
VXP IS WHAT IS SPELLED OUT ON THE INSIDES OF YOUR EYE
VXP IS WHY YOU NEED TO CUT YOUR SKIN OFF WITH SANDPAPER
6) EXHALE AND CEASE BREATHING
7) AWAIT DEATH