(to the tune of "Without Me" by Eminem)

Guess who's back, back again
Comcast's back, tell a friend
Guess who's back, guess who's back
Guess who's back, guess who's back
They've created a monster, ‘cause nobody wants ta
Be Free no more, they want money, we're chopped liver
Well, if you want money, this is what I'll give ya
A little fuck ya mixed with some arguin'
Some complainin' to jump start the House quicker
Than the sums that they get paid at the Capitol,
By the comp'nies when they are co-operating
Fucking over the voters and just campaigning (heyyy!)
You waited this long, now stop debating
‘Cause we're back, we're mad, and we're all complaining.
I know that you got a job, Melania
But your husband's gov'ment is tryna fuck us,
So the FCC won't let me be
Or let me browse memes, so let me see
They try to shut me down on my PC
But my life's so empty without memes
So, come on and try, Ajit Pai,
Fuck that! why don't you die, I won't even cry,
And get ready, ‘cause this shit's about to get heavy
you just settled a lawsuit; fuck Verizon!

-masterpierround