10:47 PM - Holly: i dont want this to continue to be honest
10:47 PM - Holly: like, any of it
10:48 PM - Holly: the ammount of times you've just crushed me if beyond belief
10:48 PM - Holly: so i really want nothing to do with any of this or with you
10:49 PM - Nathanial Kray: I can't blame you.
10:49 PM - Nathanial Kray: I won't Justify my Moves. Their cunty
10:49 PM - Nathanial Kray: But if you want to stop talking thats fine. But keep me added if thats okay?
10:49 PM - Holly: sure
10:50 PM - Holly: but if you talk to me dont expect me to be peachy and happy with you
10:51 PM - Nathanial Kray: Thats fine. the way I;ve acted I understand If I'd want to be your friend then I'd need to earn that right again
10:53 PM - Holly: just try not to think of me too much in a fond light, i want move on for a bit
10:54 PM - Holly: like find another person
10:57 PM - Nathanial Kray: Okay
10:57 PM - Holly: or just stay on my own for a while
10:58 PM - Holly: i feel like a danger to myself at the moment so i dont know if being in a relationship with antone is good for me in the first place
10:58 PM - Nathanial Kray: I feel it might be. I mean I'm a fucking cunt
10:58 PM - Nathanial Kray: and look at how much we managed to get you to
10:59 PM - Holly: i mean this relationship has caused me to harm myself and have extremely negative thoughts after all the shit its done to me
11:01 PM - Nathanial Kray: But when it was at its best I hope I managed to help?
11:01 PM - Holly: god yea
11:01 PM - Holly: but when i was uncertain, affraid or the relationship got fucked over multiple times it made me do those things
11:02 PM - Nathanial Kray: I don't think I can say how sorry I feel when I hear I made you do that....
11:03 PM - Holly: i mean when i said i took chunks of skin out of my hand you said  "its just a way to deal with things"...
11:03 PM - Nathanial Kray: when you say Chunks of skin you mean just like the top layer yeah?
11:04 PM - Holly: i had to wear bandages for days...
11:04 PM - Nathanial Kray: Fucking hell
11:04 PM - Holly: like to stop fucking bleeding
11:04 PM - Nathanial Kray: Holly
11:04 PM - Nathanial Kray: Fucking hell why didn't you tell me all that?
11:04 PM - Holly: i did
11:05 PM - Holly: you said its just a way to deal with things
11:05 PM - Nathanial Kray: You should have Specified. God I'm sorry
11:05 PM - Holly: its fine
11:05 PM - Holly: wasnt the first time tbh
11:07 PM - Nathanial Kray: I feel so bad
11:07 PM - Nathanial Kray: God I'm sorry
11:07 PM - Nathanial Kray: I'm such a cunt
11:16 PM - Holly: so can i just not talk to you
11:16 PM - Holly: for a while
11:16 PM - Nathanial Kray is now Online.
11:16 PM - Holly: when i mean a while i mean a mega fucking long time
11:16 PM - Nathanial Kray: Sure Holly. Whatever you need
11:16 PM - Holly: like a few months, more preferabley
11:17 PM - Holly: scrap that actually
11:17 PM - Holly: just like never?
11:17 PM - Nathanial Kray: Holly.....
11:17 PM - Holly: how many times have you put me through the loop
11:17 PM - Holly: like
11:17 PM - Holly: a loop made out of rusty barbed wire?
11:17 PM - Holly: 4. at. fucking. least.
11:18 PM - Nathanial Kray: It's not a Loop. It's just me doing whats best for both My mental Health and my personal Wellbeing
11:18 PM - Holly: theres different perspectives here
11:18 PM - Holly: i put in all the bloody work
11:19 PM - Holly: to have it thrown back in my face several times cus "ohhh im not ready can we take a step back?"
11:19 PM - Holly: if you have even one insecurity you just move the fuck on because it will fuck you up and me even more
11:19 PM - Holly: like it has gone, yanno?
11:20 PM - Nathanial Kray: What?
11:20 PM - Holly: you caught me at a very vunerable moment and rode on it from there
11:20 PM - Nathanial Kray: No I never
11:20 PM - Holly: uh what.
11:21 PM - Nathanial Kray: Holly I'm happy to let you vent but don't you dare make out as If I had anything other then the best intentions in mind.
11:21 PM - Nathanial Kray: I'm honestly fucking disgusted you would think I'd take advantage of you
11:21 PM - Nathanial Kray: when that has never been my intention.
11:21 PM - Holly: this entire fucking thing has been like me teaching you how to shoot a gun and you blow my brains out
11:22 PM - Holly: i was foolish to come back and you were foolish to let me
11:22 PM - Nathanial Kray: No we weren't Foolish
11:22 PM - Nathanial Kray: We where Optamistic
11:22 PM - Nathanial Kray: We thought we could save what we had and we both tried to do so
11:23 PM - Holly: HOW CAN I BE OPTIMISTIC WHEN YOU LITERALLY MADE ME CONSIDER FUCKING KILLING MYSELF MULTIPLE TIMES BECAUSE OF THE REASONS WHY YOU COULDNT BE WITH ME
11:23 PM - Holly: IM ON NO FUCKING MEDICATION
11:23 PM - Holly: YOU KNEW THAT
11:23 PM - Holly: AND WHEN SOMETHING GOES WRONG YOU JUST RESET THE GAME AND EXPECTED SOMETHING TO FUCKING CHANGE
11:24 PM - Nathanial Kray: Holly.... Let's calm down
11:24 PM - Holly: MY EMOTIONS, PERCEPTION AND MINDSET ARE ALL FUCKED UP
11:24 PM - Holly: AND YOU WANT ME TO CHILL?
11:24 PM - Nathanial Kray: I understand your upset but getting furious will not help
11:24 PM - Nathanial Kray: No, but I'm asking you to stay calm. Not because I don't want to be yelled at. but because your better then that
11:24 PM - Nathanial Kray: Please. Just take a moment to compose yourself and we'll try to continue okay?
11:24 PM - Holly: WELL WHY DIDNT YOU TREAT ME THAT WAY?
11:24 PM - Holly: no
11:24 PM - Holly: were not continuing
11:25 PM - Holly: im so fucking done
11:25 PM - Holly: i'd rather put bricks on my ankles and sink at the bottom of a river
11:26 PM - Holly: the way that this has emotionally taxed me has fucked me up so much that i literally think you've made me a different fucking person
11:26 PM - Holly: so i'm just going to block you from everything
11:27 PM - Holly: dont try to contact me
11:27 PM - Holly: for the love of fucking god
11:27 PM - Nathanial Kray: Okay.
11:27 PM - Nathanial Kray: Before you do
11:27 PM - Nathanial Kray is now Offline.