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- (Author's note: I have up until now accidentally used wrong quotation marks and reversed the way talking takes place in greentexting - this has been fixed.)
- Chapter 7
- >Day Glug-Glug-Glug in Equestria.
- >You are bipedalling it down on a dirt road with the peculiar bat-pony trotting alongside you. It hadn’t taken much time to gather your belongings in a bag-pouch, and sling it across your torso, fastening and securing the pouch to yourself.
- >It was mostly just a bag of water filled canteens, some quickly gathered berries and nuts from the outer rim of the forest –and with those in hand you had started to walk down south from your house, as the instructions on the scroll had ordered you to.
- >You glanced down towards Arid Star. Her wings were tucked in safely and she was humming lightly in a happy tune.
- >Did she ever stop making any sounds? Urgh.
- >You rinse your left ear with your pinkie finger before you speak up to break the increasingly awkward tension you felt. You were sentenced to spend a far longer time with her, and you didn’t know anything about this world. So in this scenario, she was the superior one of the two of you.
- “So, Arid Star. Do you know anything about this ‘Appleloosa’ that we’re going to?”
- >”Nope!”
- >Or maybe she wasn’t.
- >she cooed happily, increasing the volume of her humming as she swung her tail to the beat of her own noises.
- >Whelp - that was one big load of no-fucking-use-at-all. You sigh with a breath stinking of disappointment.
- >You were two clueless idiots on an adventure, and you weren’t really sure why you were having it in the first place.
- >The scenery around you had slowly begun to change from the lush-green look that you knew and had started to become more and more dried out. The grass at the edges of the dirt road you were walking on was colored in a faded yellow – There weren’t any trees about either anymore. Only a few bushes with a severe lack of leaves accompanied the hallowed grass.
- >All this place needed now was the typical tumblewe- oh wait no, it’s right there, bustling across the road.
- >You wish you wore a duster-coat.
- >Proceeding with her humming, Arid Star shoots off into the sky without warning, leaving your heart fumbling about in your chest. She hovered gently up in the cloudless sky, her eyes scouting near the land that you were walking on.
- >Suddenly she started to dash down towards the ground with sudden speed, her silted eyes fixated upon a target that was making a ruckus in the dying grass.
- >A loud crash could be heard, and a whining you were all too familiar with by now followed shortly after. With a resigned huff, you went off-road to check up on your travel-m8.
- >A rabbit hopped nonchalantly between your legs, wearing a pair of aviator shades.
- >Wut? No matter.
- >Lo and behold, there she lied. A snout deeply pressed into the ground, bits and pieces of dirt covering her coat – the mane frizzled up to the max. You couldn’t help but laugh at the state of her; she looked so very adorkable like that.
- >’Anooon, it got away!’ she mumbled with a trembling voice, simply lying there in the dirt.
- >You knew what this meant. Either she’d be sullen for a little while, which you didn’t mind that much – It made her make fewer noises and you would be able to enjoy the quiet sensation.
- >”ANOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON WHY DID IT GET AWAY! IT’S NOT FAIR! I WAS TOTALLY FASTER THAN IT, AND I SAW IT BEFORE IT SAW ME! IT’S NOT FAIR, NOT FAIR!”
- >.. Or she’d throw a hissy fit, and be even louder than usual. You groaned slightly as you went down on one of your knees, and helped her back up on her hooves.
- “You’ll get it next time. Come up now – I’m guessing we still have a ways to go before we’re there.”
- >She relented with a stuck out tongue as she flew up in the air again, her quartz eyes filled with determination. You had to give her props for trying.
- ..
- >The sun was really starting to get to you, making you tug at the neck of your suit’s neck to let what little breeze that was around here onto your bare skin.
- >You were sure that the Alicorn was responsible for making your life even harder by doing this, but in retrospective you should’ve expected as much when you were going out towards a frontier.
- >The grass was now completely gone. Everything around you was brimming in a deep orange except for the few cactuses that littered the ground.
- >You take a hand down into your pouch and retrieve one of the water canteens, and with the flick of a wrist you uncork it and let the base liquid flow down your throat, savoring the mildly cold sensation that courses through your innards.
- >Arid Star was still fluttering about up in the sky, a jealousy awakening in you. She was up there in the cold breeze, while you were stuck down here on the ground with a seething heat.
- >Man, being a cowboy must really suck if you had to take this heat on a daily basis. Grunting, you begin to take your suit’s jacket off and wrap it around your waist, proceeding to roll the sleeves of your shirt up, the sweat pebbling forth from your forehead.
- >Was this how pancakes felt upon the pan?
- >You complentate over the life of a pancake.
- -
- >You peer over the horizon while your wings are flapping away with a steady rhythm, the cool breeze scratching gently at your coat.
- >It was an unusual feeling, flying in such an open terrain. There was barely anywhere to hide on the ground, nor up in the air - No leaves to cover you or grass to lie in.
- >But it wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. So far you hadn’t seen anything that looked dangerous to you, and if you saw something skittering on the ground, it wouldn’t be able to hide either!
- >You let out a suppressed snicker while flying lower, down towards the ground. Your eyes try to spot something to hunt, but nothing seems to come into your sight.
- >Hrm, this place was less inhabited than the forest – That wasn’t any fun at all!
- >You circle around for a while, trying to find just some sort of thing that you could play with, or even better – something you could slurp away at.
- >However, fate wasn’t on your side today it would seem. Unable to find any sort of prey, you let out a flabbergasted sigh, and start to prepare for landing
- >With a last flicker of your wings you glide down towards the ground again, landing safely beside Anon once more.
- >He looked like he was deep in thought, so you weren’t really going to disturb him – but a little tune wouldn’t hurt, right? Right?
- >Of course it wouldn’t. You start to hum again while trotting on the dirt road, this wasn’t so bad - You were in a not-so-dangerous place, and you had your juice-dispenser with you! Maybe if you were really nice, and really extra-extra-nice he wouldn’t try to put up a fight if you asked some blood for him right now!
- “Hey Anoooooon?”
- >He didn’t answer, hm – strange. What did silence mean?
- >You wanted silence to mean yes - it would suit your needs best, yes.
- >It totally was a yes.
- > With a little snicker you insert you fangs into the side of his arm and start to drag out the lovely, juicy blood of his! Yum!
- -
- >You are Anon, and something awoke you from your philosophic thoughts about pancakes.
- >It was something that hurt. You peer down to the side and find Arid Star, happily suckling away at your wrist – But rather than getting mad and holler at her which usually was the norm, an idea cracked in your head.
- >If she could be a devil, then so could you. As she suckles away, you take one of the canteens and open it with your teeth – with as sublte movement as you could handle with your free hand, you tip the canteen over and completely drench the bat-p0ny in water.
- >She squealed loudly and jumped away from you, the fangs disconnecting from your flesh. Her eyes glared at you like sharpened daggers whilst licking the last bits of blood away from her fangs.
- >You busted out with laughter while you put the empty canteen into the pouch, taking up another one to sate your increasing need of water.
- >Hm, that one was empty – You shrug, throwing it over your shoulder as you grab a new one.
- >Empty.
- >…
- >You start to take a hold of every canteen and shake them violently, but every one of them turns out to be a disappointment.
- >You were out of water, and you had just wasted the last water filled canteen you had on a prank! You grid your teeth as you stomp forward in anger
- >There wasn’t any Apple-whatever in sight. The sun was beaming high in the air and you were out of water. Your sweating intensified
- >Bury me not on the lone prairie.
- >You rubbed the bridge of your nose, starting to take off your shirt completely and put it on top of your head. You had seen action heroes in movies do that kind of stuff whenever they were out in a desert.
- >You looked fucking ridiculous, judging by the fact that Arid Star had already stopped glaring at you and were snickering endlessly.
- >”keekeekeekee wha- wha- keekee what are you doing?!” she said, trying her best to stop herself from snickering you to death.
- “Just roll with it”
- >Around now, you had been walking for so long that you started to stagger. The beaming orb on the sky was really getting to you by now. You needed shade, you needed somewhere to rest.
- >Looking at your surroundings, you scope out an enormous range of mountains. You would have to stray off the path, but at this point in your life – you didn’t really give a rats ass about that damned road.
- ‘Arid, I need to rest.’
- >You blurt out as you start to walk off the path. Arid Star raises an eyebrow at you, but follows suit.
- >She doesn’t appear to be sweating at all – and she has been both flying and wearing a coat of fur for the entire time.
- >Fucking ponies, how do they work?
- >A short while after you were at the foot of the towering mountain range, and you slowly started to look for some sort of shade you could nestle yourself in for an hour or two – so that you could allow your body to cool down.
- >Sadly, the sun was on your side of the mountain, and not the opposite – making the shade next to nonexistent. Fucking fate was out to gob you.
- >You refused to die by the hand of Celestia’s third tit. No, you had to keep going – surely there’d be some sort of enclave, or cove, or a massive fucking train-tunnel.
- >You blink.
- >In front of you was an entrance to a massive train-tunnel, looking down you see some old, dusty train tracks.
- >In the corner of your mind, something told you that this was a bad idea. Yet, this was your only chance to escape that blasted sun for some time.
- >You’d just go a little bit in, sit by the entrance or something.
- >It wasn’t like you had to go all the way in and possibly get wrecked by an incoming train.
- >”A CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAVE!”
- >With all but a woosh, Arid Star flies straight into the tunnel with a loud screech, her body disappearing into the darkness.
- >The Horse-Bird-Narwhal’s demand comes to mind.
- “ARID STAR, WAIT UP!”
- -
- >Oh boy had you missed this already! As much as the open air was a nice change of scenery, it really didn’t beat the feel of a cave enshrouded in darkness. In here you were safe and sound from the dangers of the outside world.
- >Wait, weren’t you forgetting someone?
- >Nah!
- >Your eyes see through the darkness with a clear and somber vision. You twirl around in your natural environment, doing summersaults and twirls in the air like a total badass! You had completely forgotten how awesome you were!
- >You let yourself hang down from the roof while inhaling the musk, dusted air inside the cave – your chest puffing out proudly.
- >A salamander was skittering about the ground. You could hear its blood echoing throughout the cave.
- >Now you really felt like you were forgetting someone.
- >Oh wait! Your Juice-Dispenser – Anon!
- >You quickly detach from the rocky roof and flap your way back towards the way you came from. You spot Anon resting halfway in, his back against the walls of the cave.
- “Anon, are you okay?”
- >He was wheezing and coughing heavily for air – It probably didn’t help that the air in here was specked with dust.
- >”I – I am fine Arid” he said before letting out another hacking cough.
- >Hrmpf, you didn’t like when Anon lied to you. You were sure that frowny faces made the blood taste sourer.
- >It would probably be for the best if you got him out to the fresh air again. You wanted to enjoy this cave, sure – but you wouldn’t give it up for free, self-sustaining food.
- >You started to shove lightly at Anon with the tip of your nose.
- “Let’s get outside again Anon!”
- >Anon was not responding – He wasn’t coughing anymore either.
- >Shoving harder will surely fix this!
- “Aaaaanooooon!”
- >He still wasn’t moving, nor responding – In fact you don’t think he was breathing anym-
- >Oh no! Anon!
- >Juice-Dispenser!
- >Blood!
- >You quickly try to bite at his shirt, forgetting that it’s planted neatly on top of his head. Silly Anon, why would you do that!!
- >In your panic you try your best to scoot under him and get him up on your back. You are more or less successful with your intention.
- >He is lying across of your wings, rather than on top of you – You felt like a pack-pony, hrmpf!
- >Also, your wings felt irritably sensitive with anon over them.
- >Regardless, beggars couldn’t be choosers. With a steady push you start to gallop back to the entrance that you came from, following the train-tracks.
- >Then, the roaring in your ears started, making you screech in agony.
- -
- >You are Sire Metalbucket McGawyer the second – Proud member of the Line 6000 express route. Slayer of many hours and the defender of saving time.
- >You are a train.
- >CHOO-CHOO MOTHERFUCKER.
- >BETTER STAY OUT OF MY WAY, OR YOU’RE GON’ GET #REKTED
- >WHT’CHU GONNA DO ‘BOUT MY MAD SKILLS HUH?!
- >I’LL 360 NO-SCOPE WRECK YOU.
- -
- >You blink your eyes once, twice, thrice.
- >For a second you are convinced that you have turned blind – That Arid Star had decided to use your eyes as a place to rest her fangs.
- >All you saw was white. Blinding, white light.
- >Your ears felt like they were listening to the Omaha Beach scene in Saving Private Ryan. Every sound felt hollow and dimmed.
- >”aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa”. “Chooooo-choooooooo”.
- >”AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH”
- >”CHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-CHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO”
- >HOLY JESUS FUCK THAT ISN’T JUST WHITE LIGHT THAT’S A FUCKING TRAIN WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON YOU’RE RESTING ON TOP OF ARID STAR AND SHE’S GALOPPING FOR BOTH OF YOUR LIVES
- >WHY ISN’T SHE USING HER WINGS!?
- >OH WAIT, YOU’RE LYING ON TOP OF THEM.
- >Arid Star must have felt you shuffling about above her as she ran, because she started to yell out rather than screaming.
- >”ANON, GET OFF MY WINGS!”
- >You fumbled about on top of the small pony, partly scared to death that this was to be your final moment, and partly surprised that she could carry you.
- >Dem muscles.
- >You barely manage to get off her wings before she dashes off into the air, flapping franticly with all her might – You can hear that she is clearly crying in fear as the train slowly catches up with the both of you.
- >You are too scared to cry, you are simply clinging to Arid Star for your dear live. You prayed to any sort of god that could possibly exist in this world for some sort of miracle to happen.
- >But you’d really rather die, than praying to a goddess in this world.
- >But wait, there! Squeezing your eyes you manage to make out a light at the end of the tunnel.
- >You knew this would end in two ways.
- >Either, you would see the light at the end of the tunnel.
- >Or, you would see the light at the end of the tunnel.
- >You were hoping for the former.
- >It all felt like it was going in slow motion – You could do nothing, you were powerless. All you could do was put your faith in Arid Star and her ability to fly fast.
- >Huh, that was a new one.
- -
- >You are Arid StarFLYFASTERIKNOWYOUCANDOITARIDSTARBELIEVEINYOURSELF.
- >BELIEVE BELIEVE BELIEVE BELIEVE BELIEVE BELIEVE BELIEVE.
- >As the damp, fresh smell of the outside hits you the train is right behind you – You could almost feel the steel trunk of the train with the tip of your tail.
- >You yelp out one last time before you cast yourself to the side, crashing down towards the ground with anon fumbling down off you.
- >You were safe from the typical run-away-from-the-train scene! You barely managed to steer your own, tumbling self away from a collection of cacti.
- >Anon wasn’t so lucky, his body collided straight into a cactus – Making him holler in pain as the needles stuck themselves into his flesh.
- >Hmh. You thought he would’ve got used to being stung by now.
- >After you manage to relocate your heart and your bearings (Huh, still a desert – who would’ve thought.) you make your way over towards Anon, stuck in the cactus.
- >He is bleeding slightly from the pierced flesh, your precious juice mixing with the grimy sand beneath your hooves.
- >Mmmmmmmmmmm.. Blood.
- >No! You have to help Anon! Oh! Maybe he’ll reward you for saving his hide!
- >You totally deserved extra servings from him tonight!
- “Are you okay this time, Anon?”
- >”Ngh……I am.. Fine..” He manages to mumble as he painfully removes the hugging cactus from himself – His bare torso is mixed with blood, sweat and dust, shining in the midst of the sun.
- >Your heart skipped a beat. Huh, you thought you had located it already.
- >Deciding to cast a glance across the horizon once more, you find a bustling little city at the far end of the train tracks.
- >Maybe that was the Pear/banana/apple/loosa thing you had tried to find all along!
- “Anon, look over there! It’s a city!”
- >He quickly looked the way that you were pointing, a curled and small smile forming on face.
- >Oh you so deserved extra servings!
- -
- >Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Fucking cacti.
- >You were starting to understand why Arid hated greens.
- >It was like Sonic had sprayed his love all over your chest and afterwards bolted away at the speed of sound, with places to go – following a rainbow.
- >However you were finally about to reach that damned city!
- >Civilization awaited you, prancing ever so lightly towards the city. You needed water, even if you had to brush somep0nys mane in order to get what you wanted.
- >Wait, this was going to be the first time you’d visit a town in this world (beside the very first day you were planted into this world)
- >How should you approach? Did they have set standards? Specific ways of going about certain things? Would you have to sniff their plot as a greeting?
- >You felt spaghetti producing in the small holes the cactuses had made in you, but you confidently slurped it all back into yourself. No, you were going to march into that city – get your water and do whatever that deplorable sheriff wanted from you.
- >As Arid Star and yourself entered the frontier village.
- >As a bipedal Alien and a predatory pony entered the frontier village.
- >Well, the p0nies stared at you with frightened eyes. You couldn’t help but feel like the bad guy at the end of a western movie, walking towards the one-on-one duel with the town’s sheriff
- >If only Arid Star’s fur had been black and edgy.
- >A small foal bustled out from under a carriage. As he fell before you, he stared up at you with enormous, teary eyes
- >”A-A-Are you a M-M-Monster?” he quivered in fear.
- >Well shit, how were you going to make the first impression in this town?
- >You kneeled down as you whispered towards the filly.
- “What the fuck did you just say to me you little foal? I’ll have you know I wa-“
- >Arid Star kicks you nonchalantly on your injured chest, making you wheeze and cough like a sissy.
- “I mean of course not!”
- >The foal blinked widely towards you, the teary eyes drying up as the little guy realized he wasn’t going to have his back gobbled up.
- >”So Y-You won’t G-Gobble me?” he said wearily.
- >You remember yourself in a cave not many days ago. What the fuck nostalgia?
- “No, I won’t.”
- >The foal still didn’t really move, he just kept on asking
- >”What are you? Where did you come from? Are you a minotaur? Why don’t you have any fur? Is that filly your Marefriend? Why don’t you have any fur?
- >God, you hated kids.
- >You Are Sheriff Silverstar, and who in Celestia’s name is bustling around on your frontier?
- >Donning your hat, you went outside of the saloon where you had just enjoyed a simple apple-cider until a damsel in distress had cried about how two monsters had entered the town.
- >Nop0ny was going to rustle this city jimmies while you had a say in it! Slowly you made your way to the entrance of the ci- what in tarnation were you looking at?
- >An injured monkey, with dried blood upon his chest was squatting down and talking to one of town’s residents, a foal no less! What was a monkey doing out here?
- >Looking further upon the scenario, you realized that he was far too tall to be a monkey, nor did he have any tail or fur to accompany with.
- >Indstead he was wearing some sort of fabric around his lower half, and an appendage on his head – very strange indeed!
- >Beside the bipedal creature stood a P0ny with wings – So a Pegasi.
- >No, wait – as you went closer, you noticed how there were no feathers on her wings – rather it looked like it was made out of some leathery texture.
- >You hadn’t ever seen a pegasi with leather wings, then again – you never knew with those damned pegasi.
- >Maybe it was in to have leather-wings somewhere in Cloudsdale or some other fancy-schmancy town.
- >You unsheathed your pie from your pie-holster, not a single fuck given.
- >Ever since the buffalo incident, you had been wearing one of those – Not because you distrusted the buffaloes, but because you weren’t about to see another incident like that happen if you could stop it before it would occur.
- >Ihaveseensomeshit.jpg
- “And just wha’ in Equestria did’ya think yer’ doin’, you creature you.”
- -
- >Way to make a good impression, Anon.
- >You had simply wished to strangle the kid in your thoughts – you weren’t actually going to do it.
- >Yet fate already punished you by putting Somep0ny on your ass.
- >An eye fell upon his badge, making you realize just what he was – A Sheriff.
- >Finally! Time to figure out just what in the world that damned Alicorn wanted you to do out here!
- “I am the Human that Celestia sent out here, surely you must’ve heard about it.”
- >A pie flew straight into your face.
- >It was an apple pie.
- >Someone just wasted good, delicious apple pie on your face.
- >Who in their right mind would do such a terrible act?!
- >”you listen here little boy’o. I ain’t heard none ‘bout any ‘hooman’, and I don’ believe for even a’ second that y’ know Princess Celestia”
- >..Really, fucking really?
- End Chapter 7
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