Unplugged

>You are in pain. Lots of pain.
>One minute you were sitting at your computer.
>Then the damn thing starts exploding at your feet and zapping everything in sight.
>Now you’re in a lab.
>Your limbs feel stiff.
>You still feel the tingling pain of being electrocuted.
>And you’re pretty sure a few brain cells died, making you effectively a vegetable or at least somewhat handicapped.
??:Oh goodness! Is it awake? Did I work?
>You look over and see a horse.
>Big eyes, brown coat, and an hourglass on its ass.
>Also a bowtie for some reason.
??: Hah hah yes! I did it! Results this quickly and just with the prototype! I barely had to use magic for this one!
>Why is the horse talking? Horses don’t talk. They don’t wear bowties either but that’s not important. And what’s this about a prototype?
>You open your mouth to talk, but nothing comes out.
??: Now let’s see, I just need to make a few additions to the model and everything should be order. Why doctor, you’ve outdone yourself this time!
>You try moving.
>It’s all very stiff and unnatural, but you find yourself propped up on this examination table in no time.
>You look down at yourself and notice why things feel stiff.
>Every bit of you looks like some steampunk fanatic threw gears together into a humanoid shape.
>Brass covers you from head to toe and you’re just looking at your skeleton.
>Frankly, you feel a bit naked.
>The good doctor didn’t notice you getting up.
>He was looking over something with a pencil in his mouth. Yeah he probably built whatever you are now.
>Why not show him how well his “prototype” works?
--
>You stand up quickly notice how off balance you feel.
>There’s a large limb sticking out by your ass and your feet feel very off.
>As you look back and notice the start of a skeletal tail, you lose your balance and fall over with a loud crash.
>At least you confirmed that pain is still something you feel.
??: Gah! You’re already walking? Oh dear!
>Dr. Horse drops what he’s doing and lends a hand (hoof?) to help you up.
??: This certainly wasn’t in the original design at all! You shouldn’t be able to walk until I finish your balance stabilizer.
>He means tail, right? Just call it a tail like a normal person.
??: Can you understand me? Can you talk?
>You nod your head and mouth the word “no”
??: Of course, I still need to add a voice box and finish your chassis.
>He helps you to the table you woke up on, where you sit down as he goes to retrieve something.
>You take the time to truly take in this lab.
--
>Everything looks like if Da Vinci was ahead by another generation until you look at the glaring elephant above you.
>A machine glowing blue with some sort of… sciency energy and cables running down.
>All leading into your back.
>Something tells you this is basically your lifeline now.
>Honestly, between waking up as a bunch of clockwork built by a genius horse and learning that he built an iron man core above you as your heart.
>The core makes you the most worried.
>That’s your heart now. How long can you last without it? Can you last without it?
>How far do these cables reach? What happens if you get unplugged?
>You’d be hyperventilating, but you don’t have lungs anymore.
>There’s just a rattling sound of your skeleton starting to jitter.
>Just in time for your apparent creator to walk back in with a weird speaker in his mouth.
>He sets it down next to you, still shaking and rattling.
??: Good heavens, are you okay?
>You shake your head.
??: Not to worry! I’ll have your voice box installed in just a moment so you can properly communicate. Lay down for me, please.
>You do so, now feeling the cables against your metallic spine as you look up at your external heart.
??: Now I’m going to have to shut you down for a moment to do this. Don’t worry, this’ll only take a second.
>Horse don’t you fucking da-
--
>Your thoughts are quickly cut short as everything stops.
>You feel like you’re asleep. Dreaming if anything.
>But that’s the thing, dreams have things. You’re not anywhere, you don’t feel anything at all.
>Did you die? Is this what death is like?
>You look around frantically and see a glimpse of something.
>A stream of stars along a flowing blue mist.
>All emanating from something.
>Before you can get a better look, you shoot up in the lab again.
??: Careful now! Wouldn’t want to go damaging anything.
“Did I just fucking die!?”
--
>Oh hey, you can talk now. Great.
??: Sorry, what?
“That shut down thing! Did I die?! I’m pretty sure you just killed me and brought me back!”
??: I’m not sure. Apologies, I’ve never exactly been an automaton before.
>He chuckles.
>Is this what a computer goes through whenever it gets shut down?
>Good thing it’s not sentient.
“Neither have I. Let’s never do that again.”
??: Right, I’m sure I could get that arranged. But first, I never introduced myself.
>Oh shit, the horse has a name. Of course it does, it can talk.
DH: I am Doctor Hooves, resident inventor of Ponyville.
“Ponyville?”
DH: Why yes! A nice and quiet town full of all kinds of new friends.
“Uh huh. And you’re… a pony.”
DH: Of course!
“So if everyone here is a pony, why am I a… not pony?”
DH: Well I’ve noticed recently the potential dragons have with their strange physiology and-
“I’m a dragon. A robot dragon.”
DH: Yes you are! Now the recent discoveries from our resident dragon’s actions have blah blah
>You’re a dragon. Made of cogs and whatever, but a dragon.
>Quite a good outcome from being zapped by a computer this morning.
>Assuming you’re not hallucinating this in some coma.
>If it wasn’t for where you ended up and death constantly at your door, this would be pretty rad.
>It’s still rad with that, but why not get rid of the limiters?
DH: and then there was him with the changelings an-
>You stop him and put your claws on his shoulders.
“I need you to give me a portable battery.”
DH: But that generator you’re connected to can’t function on a small scale. At least not without a little magic but-
“Doctor, please. You’ve opened up the possibilities for a dragon to explore a completely new world. I need this.”
DH: I can try but don’t expect any miracles.
“I’m a sentient conglomeration of brass parts with wires sticking out of my back. I’m sure you can work a miracle.”
--
>It’s been about a day or so since you first woke up here.
>You’re starting to get a bit stir crazy being stuck in this room, but it beats being an empty metal husk.
>Right, you’re metal now. A weird brass, draconic skeleton.
>Come to think of it, you never got a good look at yourself ever since you’ve been here.
>You’ve kinda been waiting for that battery to get done and practicing walking around.
>After looking for a mirror, you find your reflection in a clock on some machine.
>Good god, you look like a rejected chuck e cheese mascot missing the fuzzy suit.
>A strangely put together brass skull is staring back at you with glowing blue eyes.
“Hey doc?”
>“Yes?”
“When you finish that battery thing, mind making me not look like a horror show?”
>“Ah, right. A proper face should be easy to install after this. Of course, I will have to shut you down to do so.”
>Oh fuck no, not that again.
“What if you don’t do that this time?”
>“Well I would risk electrocuting myself and possibly installing this improperly.”
>You don’t know circuits, but something tells you that that would be bad for the both of you.
>You sigh. Well, you make a sighing sound.
>Dr. Hooves leads you back to your table where you lay down.
>“Just like last time, this won’t take long.”
>Right, last time. Just think happy thoughts.
“Hey, by the way. If this doesn’t work, do you got something to call me other than prototype?”
>“Well, what did you have in mind?”
>Shit. What do you have in mind?
>You did kind of show up from some probably magical means. From one world to another.
“Bifrost?”
>”That’s an odd sounding name. Where did you get that?”
>You shrug. Honestly, mythology just popped into your head while you were thinking.
>“You’re quite the oddity, Bifrost. I can’t wait to bring you around Ponyville.”
“Right. I’ll see you in a bit.”
>And with that, you’re plunged into the dark void again.
--
>Dark and empty, just as you remembered it.
>The flowing bits of stars is also back in the distance, but it doesn’t seem like it’s moving.
>Everything about this just screams dead. All those afterlife ideas are now confirmed to be lies thanks to this.
>Or is this because you’re a robot now?
>You know you died back home. People don’t just walk away from a lightning computer.
>The world when you’re “on” can’t be your Earth.
>Here, you’re just a consciousness in an empty expanse.
>Is that what it’s like for a soul after it passes? It just floats aimlessly in emptiness until it gets a proper body?
>Then how did you get to this new world? There’s nothing magical about death.
>Eventually, your thoughts are halted with the world flooding back in.
>Things exist now, everything’s fine. But what about that stuff about…
>About. . .
>What were you thinking about back then?
>It feels like an eternity between then and now.
>But you just turned back on.
>Dammit you’re sure you were onto something.
--
>“Hello? How are you feeling?”
“A little heavier and more tired, but otherwise fine.”
>”Well that’s a relief. For a second, I thought that crystalline dynamic cell wouldn’t hold.”
“My… battery?”
>“Yes, that.”
>You get up and look around, but notice a missing tug on your back.
>Looking behind you, you see that the cables are back on the table.
>A slowly intensifying buzz and ring start filling around the room as a smile grows on your face.
“It worked? I can go outside?!”
>Doc seems to be covering his ears in pain. That’s coming from you, isn’t it?
>You start to calm down a little as the sound subsides. He gets back up and looks at you.
>”Perhaps using a crystal based energy source wasn’t the best course of action.”
>You can barely manage a chuckle as he gets up and opens the door outside.
>It’s a nice and sunny day. Horses, er, ponies of all kinds are all doing something.
>Some of them have wings, a few have weird horns sticking out of their head.
>Okay this is a much stranger place than you first thought.
>Then again, strange is normal now.
>”Well come on now!”
>The doctor rushes out.
>”I need to share you and this discovery with the princess!”
>Princess? Shouldn’t a queen or a king be the person to show off to?
--
>The Doc leads you through pony town until stopping in front of a large tree.
>Made of crystals.
>Towering over every other building and appearing a little out of place.
>How is it that you only noticed this as you got closer?
>He knocks on the door while you’re more focused on the sheer scope of this thing.
>This doesn’t exactly seem normal by pony standards
>Then a purple pony with wings *and* a horn answers
>Do genetic defects justify royalty too?
>You’re not even paying attention to what they’re saying.
>The fact that this is just swept under the rug is leaving you stunned.
>Then again, this is normal.
>Bringing up Earth doesn’t sound like a bad idea right about now.
>It’s then that you notice the purple winged and horned princess staring at you at eye level.
>Her horn is glowing as she looks to be staring into your soul.
“Hello there.”
>She falls back. Something tells you she didn’t expect you to be able to talk.
>“This is amazing! And you say he’s fully sentient?”
>The doctor puffs out his chest and smirks.
>“Why yes he is! Some of my finest work yet!”
>“No signs of magic, fully mechanical, crystal power source. I didn’t think this would be possible *with* the help of magic!”
>The smile on her face is massive. Cartoonishly so.
>“Can I let him stay here for a while?”
>“Well I mean, there were a few modifications I was going to work on.”
“I’m right here y’know.”
>“Right, of course.”
>“Sorry, forgot you’re actually sentient.”
>If you ever get to your uprising, she goes down first.
“I’d rather stay in the lab for a while longer. I don’t know how long my battery lasts before I uh.”
>The thought of it makes your gears rattle a bit.
>“Yes, as you can see, Bifrost is still in need of a proper power source. We only just got one working a few minutes ago.”
>The princess’ expression saddens from this news.
>Wow, she must have been pretty excited to study you.
>You walk up to her and extend your claw.
“We’re going to be seeing each other again. Mind telling me your name now instead of later?”
>”Oh right! I am Twilight Sparkle, princess of friendship!”
>Princess of friendship?
>*Friendship?*
>She sounded so proud of herself!
>Don’t laugh, this is probably a really big deal and she’s an actual princess.
>Don’t laugh in the face of royalty that has dominion over a social concept.
“I’ll be seeing you around, Princess Sparkle.”
>God that sounds even cheesier being said aloud.
>You could swear something was gonna fall off from how much you were shaking.
>Keep that laughter contained Frost, we’re being formal now.
>”Oh, no need to be so formal with me. Twilight works just fine..”
>She took it as nervousness.
>The clueless mare.
>Hopefully you get used to this naming convention.
>Princess Sparkle sounds like something from a line of little girl’s dolls.
>“Well we really must be going. Don’t know how long we can go without a proper generator!”
>“Alright. It was nice meeting you Bifrost. I can’t wait to see you again.”
“Same to you.”
>If she opens up any part of you, you’re both going to find out if you can breathe fire or not.
>The walk back leaves you feeling a lot more tired than you remember.
>Your movement is starting to slow and you feel your gears clicking more than usual.
>Upon arriving, you plug yourself in and lie down on the table.
“Do you have any ideas for a better battery? I don’t think I was even out too long before I needed this thing again?”
>The doctor goes towards a back room as the sun begins setting on this day.
>“None at the moment. Unless I can find something that holds energy more efficiently or generates power, this is the best I can do.”
“Alright. I can make do with… thirty minutes off a plug?”
>It really isn’t that much, but you can make it work.
>This is a small town after all.
>The doctor yawns as he stands by this extra room, which you assume is his bedroom.
>”Sorry, but I’ve been quite busy with getting you functional. I don’t think I’ve slept for the past few days.”
>Wow. A few days and he made a sentient steampunk sci-fi abomination that works?
>That’s pretty impressive for a pony. Better than what most scientists could do back home.
>Right. Home.
>You’ll uh, talk about that later.
“Oh it’s fine. Thanks for y’know, building me. I can’t imagine that was easy.”
>“My pleasure. You are quite the wonder after all.”
“Yeah yeah, scientific pride and joy and all that. Go get some sleep already.”
>”Goodnight Bifrost.”
“G’night doc.”
>And off he trots for the night.
>Now comes the issue. Do you even sleep anymore?
--
>Sleep never was an issue for you.
>You were one of those lucky people who could just pass out on command and wake up feeling refreshed.
>You’re not tired, but it feels unnatural being awake for this long with nothing to do.
>In the past, it was just your computer that kept you up, not being the computer.
>Either way, you’re bored and have nothing to really do.
>Not gonna be fun if you’re staying in this mystical equine land.
>The window lets in a bit of moonlight, somehow not blocked by the light behind your generator.
>A slight breeze was being let in as your attention shifted to the door.
>It’s been 40 or so minutes of just inspecting things around this lab.
>You should have enough charge to last outside for a bit.
>The door doesn’t seem locked. Good thing no one seems to steal around here.
>At least you assume that’s the case. Hard to imagine these cute fuzzy things committing crimes.
>You grab a spare watch, unplug yourself, and step into the cool night air.
>The perfect hour. Everyone’s asleep and you can finally take a breather.
>Night has been your go to time for that reason.
>And then you glanced up and saw the stars.
>You’ve seen clear nights from your times camping as a little kid, but this takes the cake.
>No light pollution out here, meaning things are a lot more clear than you’re used to.
>Not even two feet from the door and you’re gawking at the glittering dark shroud that is the night sky.
>What brings you back is a mischievous chuckle from behind you.
>Looking around there doesn’t seem to be anyone, thought you do see a glimpse of something.
>A red tail with a white tuft slithering into the shadows to the side of the building.
>Any sane person would probably shrug this off and move on.
>So you follow it down the alley to see what other creatures are around here.
>You’re a fucking robot. A dragon robot.
>You’re not programmed to know fear.
>Or programmed at all.
>You turn the corner and prepare for something to jump out at you.
>Instead there’s a something.
>A goat headed mash of various creatures with sunglasses leaning against the wall.
>Out of everything in the place, the fact he’s wearing shades at night is the strangest thing in this situation.
“Who are you?”
>“Keep your voice down! There are ponies sleeping!”
>Figures that even the weird creatures here are silly in some way.
“Who are you and what are you doing here?”
>“Odd question for a mechanical wonder such as yourself.”
“Fair. You gonna answer the question or not?”
>He disappears and reappears in front of you with neon lights spelling his name.
>Confetti and streamers included falling above the scene.
>“I am Discord. Your resident god of chaos, disharmony, etc., etc.”
“Really? Me, a mockery of magic and embodiment of science is talking to a god.”
>“I know. I didn’t expect a human showing up like this either.”
>Wait what was that? What does he know?
“Can you repeat that last bit?
>He squeezes your cheeks.
>“It’s not everyday something like you shows up here.”
>You shoo him away, only for him to teleport next to you.
>”A mundane, fleshy meatsack waking up as a cold and unfeeling machine. But what would I know?”
“A lot. Can we skip the banter and just get on with this?”
>“I can. But I want to see where this goes.”
>He pulls out a tuning fork. A really small tuning fork.
>It’s barely as big as one of your claws.
>Then he strikes it, letting a noise ring out.
>No one seems to be reacting, but you can feel this in your chest.
>Something vibrating.
>Oh right, your fake heart. It’s crystal.
>You fall over, feeling pain as your chest violently vibrates among other parts.
>The big chaotic deity conjured a clipboard and scribbled something down.
“Fucking really?!”
>Note to self, see about getting some sort of artillery on you for this guy in particular.
>And almost as fast as it came, it stops.
>You’re up now run straight towards Discord.
“Stop the tricks! Explain!”
>“Well the soundwaves from this oscillatory dining instrument resonated-”
“Not the science jargon, why you brought me here!”
>He hands you the fork.
>”Well that’s something I’m afraid I can’t talk about right now. Plans and schemes. You know how this works.”
“Don’t care! ANSWER!”
>He starts slinking into the shadows, with his smile still visible.
>”Enjoy your time out tonight. Time is so short for you after all.”
“DON’T PLAY CRYPTIC WITH ME! ANSWER THE QUESTION!”
>He vanished.
>Words cannot begin to describe your frustrations right now.
>What would be a good way to express this anger?
>Property destruction seems like a good first thought.
>You kick a trash can and send it flying towards the edge of town.
“No. No temper tantrums, I am an adult and I will handle this like an adult.”
>Seeing that your old creator is a genius without a computer, vidya isn’t an option.
>Can robots drink away their frustrations?
>Of course not. What else is there?
>Your gaze turns towards the large glittering tree housing the mutant princess.
>Complaining to authority? Why not?
>You’ve got time to kill.
>You try knocking on the door for about five minutes and get nothing.
>C’mon, kinda on a tight schedule.
>No one is outside to stop your trek to the castle or to even start infiltrating.
>It’s gonna be easy. Too easy.
>That purple monarch probably has some magic trap outside to stop people like you.
>Still need to work on getting wings if your dense ass can manage flight.
>You sink your claws into the wall of the crystal tree and start climbing.
>She better know about this chaos god.
----
>You are Twilight and someone just set off one of your magic alarms.
>You drop something from your more recent studies and start looking for whoever’s trying to get inside.
>The halls seem to be empty save for Spike who seems to have just woken up.
>”Twilight, shouldn’t you be asleep right now?”
“I was getting to that! Someone tripped one of the alarms!”
>”Uh-huh. Maybe you should just go to your room and get some nice re-”
>There’s a loud and metallic clank that echoes through the halls.
>Spike has already jumped and hidden behind you.
>The clacking slowly starts echoing more and more.
>”Wh-what’s that?”
“Whoever it is, they’re not going to just sneak into my castle like this.”
>You start moving through the halls, following the metallic sounds.
>Spike follows suit still shaking a bit.
>You can hear ticking nearby too, you must be getting close.
>Behind a corner as you continue your search, you see a large brass dragon walking down the halls and glowing blue along the way.
>Wasn’t that Dr. Hooves’ old robot from today?
>Why was it here?
>It looks directly at you, anger in its cold eyes.
>You tense in its gaze.
>”SPARKLE! YOU’VE GOT SOME QUESTIONS TO ANSWER!”
>You grab Spike and sprint away.
>This is not going to happen tonight.
>You are not going to have some robot rampage at this hour.
>Besides, it should be on a battery and deactivate soon.
>The two of you go into the library and lock the door.
“Spike, I want you to go to Dr. Hooves and tell him about his invention.”
>“But then I’d have to go through the halls with the ro-”
>You teleport him away to the Doctor’s house.
>Now then, how to deal with this thing right now.
>Something banged on the door outside.
>Dammit, that things fast for a bunch of metal.
>You start taking books and stacking them into a barricade against the door
>”OPEN UP! WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT THAT DRAGON GOAT DEMON THING!”
>Wait, who?
“Do you mean Discord?”
>”OF COURSE I DO! HARD TO FORGET THE NAME WHEN IT’S GLOWING ABOVE HIS HEAD!”
>Yeah, that’s Discord alright.
>You teleport it into the library, where it fall over from the sudden lack of a door.
>The robot gets up and dusts itself off.
>”Okay, I’m on a timer so I’ll keep this brief. Who’s Discord and why would he be interested in me?”
>That’s a good question. Why would he be interested in this dragon prototype?
>You’ll have to ask him the next time you see him.
“Discord is a bit, chaotic to put it bluntly. He shows up and does whatever it is he does every now and again. Fluttershy says he means well, but I don’t think him being interested in you could be good for anypony.”
>It’s shaking. The poor thing must be scared about what’s going to happen now.
“I mean, you could always just come to me or Fluttershy if he gives you trouble. We’ll sort him out, don’t worry.”
>The robot sighs.
>”Right. Anyways, this has been fun but I should be going before I run out of power. Robot things, you know how it is.”
>It checks its watch and raises an eyebrow.
>”Or maybe not?”
“What do you mean?”
---
>You are now Bifrost and time seems to have gone out the window.
>According to this watch, you should’ve shut down about ten minutes ago.
>That said, you’re nowhere near tired.
>In fact, you’re practically buzzing with energy. Or is that just that thing in your chest?
>Was that what that fork did?
>Before you could process more of this information, there’s a knock on the door.
>“Excuse me? Is Bifrost still active in there?”
>You and princess friendship immediately turn towards the door.
>If you weren’t mistaken, that was Dr. Hooves.
>”Yeah, I’ll let you in in a bit.”
>Twilight is already in the process of clearing the very neat stack of books from the door to let them in.
>Because why not do that instead of teleport them in?
>In no time at all, your creator runs in in a panic.
>Chances are, he thought you were tearing apart the princess due to some bug.
>“Princess, I am so sorry. I didn’t realize he would go out at such an hour.”
”I don’t sleep. Sue me if I get bored.”
>”Yes, we’ll have to find a way to sort that out later. Until then, we need to get you charged lest we worry about another power failure.”
>Yeah, you’ll explain that power thing when you get home.
>He’ll get a kick out of that and probably lose sleep over working on that.
>Let’s let the guy sleep, he deserves it.
“That would be a good idea. I’ll be seeing ya Twilight.”
>”You two. Please, talk to me if Discord starts giving you any trouble.”
>Hooves’ eyes grow wide as he looks between the both of you.
>”Excuse me, who was doing what now?”
“Tomorrow.”
>”Bifrost, I need details. A god of chaos doesn’t simply talk to a pony without doing something.”
“I’ll explain tomorrow.”
>The two of you are halfway towards the lab by now.
>He’s been pestering you for quite some time.
>Why are the inventors always the stupidly inquisitive ones?
>Wait, he doesn’t know how your battery timer works. You could just fake shutting down.
>You start slowing down and experiment with turning down your lights.
>It took some doing, but you managed to get them turned off completely, save for the glowing battery.
>The two of you are at the door to his house when you make your moves grind to a halt.
>Without budging at all, you fall to the ground right next to the Doctor.
>You could still see him and his frustration, but you figure it’d be best to not move and let him get over it until morning.
>He does somehow manage to get you inside, but it seems that he was too tired to continue and simply gave up for the night.
>Off to bed he went.
>And up you were to wait until morning.
>>The following morning
>You’re sitting on your table and waiting, tuning fork in claw facing the doorway to the doctor’s bedroom.
>Why not surprise him in this morning.
>In he walks, wiping the sleep from his eyes and moving over to plug you in.
>He quickly noticed that you were waiting for him and jumped.
“Now that you finally got a good rest, what details did you want?”
----
>”H-how did you do that last night?!”
>You shrug.
“Pulled that one outta my ass. Didn’t actually know it was something I could do.”
>It’s only been three days since you woke up here. It’s not like you know how being a robot works.
>”But… you weren’t charged! You shouldn’t have any power right now! What happened while I was asleep?!”
>Oh right, that. What’s a good way to start off with that?
“So I ran into Discord last night.”
>”WHAT?!”
>Great way to start things.
“He rang a tuning fork that gave me a heart attack. Or whatever the equivalent would be. Haven’t felt tired ever since.”
>The Doctor ran over to you and quickly started looking you over.
>Looking for some sort bit of damage on you.
“Doc.”
>”Are you sure you’re okay? Nothing missing? Nothing damaged?”
“Doctor.”
>”You can never tell what that thing will do! What mess he could have made or what he could have done to-”
“Doc, I’m fine! Just a small heart attack and feeling awake. It’s nothing too serious!”
>He steps back finally. The worried look on his face remains unchanged.
>”You almost gave me a heart attack! How did you run into Discord of all ponies!?”
“I went outside and he more or less came to me.”
>The more you went on about this, the more he seemed like a worried parent.
>Dude needs to chill, you’re just a robot.
“Look, I’m gonna let you process this and go see the rest of the town. That tuning fork I told you about is on the table if you want to look at it.”
>And with that you leave the lab.
“Also, your reaction is the exact reason I didn’t want to tell you yesterday. Just let it all sink in and remember that I’m a-ok.”
“Also that I’m just a robot. You can just rebuild me if things go south.”
-----
>Now what was there to do today?
>What would be a good way to waste time and avoid that amalgamation.
>Let’s try asking about said monstrosity from the resident princess.
>Lord knows you’re going to need to get used to her title someday lest you laugh in the face of royalty.
>You could play it off as a glitch but something tells you that you really shouldn’t.
>Of you go towards the large crystal tree, which is still as hard to miss as ever.
>You knock on the door and are quickly greeted by a small dragon.
>Wasn’t he with Sparkle last night, running in fear?
“Hey, is Twilight in? I was wondering if she could give me a rundown on that goat dragon thing.”
>”Oh sure! Just this way!”
>He leads you inside and through the halls.
>How this place has halls despite being more of a tower is beyond you.
“Sorry about last night by that way. Didn’t mean to freak you two out as much as I did.”
>”Oh it’s nothing. You just caught me off guard if anything!”
>Wow he’s full of shit.
>He was probably more scared than miss friendship.
“Riiight. How about you tell me your name, kid.”
>”I’m Spike!”
“Bifrost.”
>”It’s nice to meet you Bifrost.”
“Likewise kid.”
>You both finally find Twilight, who seems to be angrily shouting at a door.
>”You can’t stay in there all day! You need to get outside and talk with somepony!”
>”And you need to let me finish my charts! I swear, this time I’m actually on to something!”
>Twilight seemed completely uninterested.
>Her horn started to glow and in a flash, a light blue dragon with glasses was warped in front of her.
>”Fucking really?! This close to piecing things together! This close!”
>She had her fingers practically touching.
>You finally walk up to the two of them and try getting the info you came for.
“Twilight, do you have a moment?”
>The dragon took one glance at you and started losing her shit.
>”FUCK THEY SENT SOME ROBOT AFTER ME! THIS IS WHY I NEEDED THE FOIL TWILIGHT!”
>You’re going to ignore that comment.
“Anyways, I need to ask a few things about Discord.”
>She sighs.
>”Today isn’t a good day for that. I need to get Muse here outside and actually talking with ponies.
>”He has spies everywhere! I can’t go outside!”
>Right, conspiracy dragon. Why are you not surprised in the slightest?
>”In fact, could you do me a favor and take her around town?”
>Yeah no, this doesn’t surprise you either.
“Sure, why not. I hardly know this place, but I’m game.”
>”Thank you so much! I promise, I’ll tell you all about him later!”
>And with that, she warps the both of you outside the castle.
>’Muse’ is banging against the door and trying to get back inside.
>You might as well get her some tin foil.
>It’d be better than having to see this all day.
---
>You tap her on the shoulder.
>”What?!”
>You could feel the venom in that one word.
>This really isn’t going to be a good day, is it?
“You gonna go look around the town with me or spend your day at this door like a sperg?”
>”Stay at the door! You’re gonna take me to your boss and wipe my mind if I go with you!”
“That’s what you’re afraid of? A small, pastel colored horse tying you up and pulling some Men In Black spell to blank your mind?”
>She finally stopped. About time logic got through to he-
>”What did you just say?”
“Men in Black spell to blank your mind?”
>”Ponies don’t have that movie… You’re not from here!”
>Fuck, she’s onto you.
>And now you’re the paranoid one.
>”We need to talk… somewhere private.”
“How about we look around the town? We might find somewhere like that?”
>And actually see what this ‘Ponyville’ place actually has to offer.
>”Good idea robot!”
“It’s Frost. Bifrost.”
>”No no, if I call you by a name then I could be worried if I have to break you.”
>Keep up with this and you might have to break her.
”Fine, you lead the way then.”
>And so the two of you continue walking through the town, getting weird stares as you do.
>That’s to be expected for you but it didn’t help that this Muse kept looking around and hiding at any spot she could find.
“Are you going to do this until we finally get to wherever we’re going?”
>”Don’t blow my cover!”
>This goes on until you both finally reach a forest. One on the outskirts of town that seems to be devoid of anyone.
“Is this it?”
>”No, we’re going a bit further.”
>>One trek through the Everfree later
>You have no idea how long you’ve been walking or where you are.
>It feels like it’s been an hour or so since the two of you were in Ponyville when Muse finally stops.
>”This seems like a good stop.”
“About time.”
>”Indeed it is. Now tell me automaton, where are you from?!”
>She points to you in an almost comical way.
>What kind of movie does she think she’s in?
“Earth.”
>”Uh huh… and how did you end up here?”
“My computer zapped me and I woke up as a draconic metal skeleton.”
>”And how am I supposed to believe these memories weren’t just programmed into you?”
>She’s inches from your face now. No wonder Twilight wanted to get rid of her.
“For starters, I don’t think a pony would know about Earth or anything that may exist there.”
>”Hm… this is a new development.”
>And it’s here that you’ve basically started tuning things out.
>”I mean, before I thought it was some other force bringing dragons here but your story doesn’t add up.”
“Mhmm. Fascinating.”
>”First there was that green ‘alchemist’, then that white british dragon, then that yellow one that Discord started messing with.”
>Excuse me, who?
“Who did what now?”
>”It doesn’t matter anymore, you being here just set me back to square one!”
“No, shut up for a second. You mentioned Discord. What does he have to do with this?”
>”A red herring if anything, just like how you might as well be.”
>Bullshit! Literally everything that’s happened doesn’t seem beyond him!
“And how are you so sure about that?”
>”I did some digging and his influence on the other dragons puts him less and less as a cause for this.”
“Bullshit.”
>”He’s a wildcard for everyone’s life. In all of this, he’s not the one to do this.”
>Y’know, with anyone else telling you this it’d be hard to believe.
>But this person is at the perfect level of obsessive and crazy to make it at least plausible.
“Keep me updated on this.”
>”Oh no, now it’s your turn. What makes you think the resident chaotic deity had some hand in this?”
>The fact that he’s probably itching to get on your back later is a good start.
“He gave me a cryptic message the other night as well as a heart attack and upgrade.”
>”So, you were his science experiment.”
“That’s… one way to put it.”
>”Look, he’s already out of the running for all of this. Believe what you want, but don’t get your paranoid delusions mixed into my theories.”
>Asimov’s laws don’t apply here, right?
>You both are in the woods, no one would hear her screams.
>”Anyways, I’ve met my mandated quota for being outside today. I’ll see you back in town.”
>You follow her.
>Hopefully she knows which way town is because you certainly don’t.
>Add GPS to that list of things you should get installed sometime.