Krayfish Typing Declarations

Oct 16th, 2020 (edited)
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  3. 9w1 (953)
  4. I have settled on 9w1 core, 953 tritype. Essentially, I could write out a big ass essay for this, but 9 as a core is quite fitting. The most selling aspect of this is how much of my actual motivations have connected to anger rather than fear. Anger may be my most inconsistent emotion, resembling tides in it's presence (because I tend to repress most things), however what pushes me through life is constantly being irritated with the un-ideality of life and that desire to mold the world into an ideal where I am no longer angry or frustrated with what ruins my own comfort and that of those I hold dear. Of course, as a heavily withdrawn character, much of this includes coming up with 10-billion detailed plans I'll probably never motivate myself to pursue (as is typical of 5/withdrawn triad influenced individuals, thinking is a comfort) and pretending that my problems aren't relevent enough to actual pursue.
  6. Most of my life has been characterized by the feeling that yielding to my desires and being connected to emotions was often something that was burdensome or took away from the health of those dear to me. Pretending I didn't have desires and ignoring my own emotional reactions (more so due to ridicule probably than anything else) was far easier than re-orienting myself around the fact that this mindset was drastically stupid and problematic in the long run, but something that has also caused me to become consumed and heavily motivated by rage. I've treated most of my life like a stepping stone, not fearing the future but clinging to it because I could build it and, clearly, even without my own effort things never stay the same forever. I've always expected things to go in my favor without putting in direct effort, have always been noted by myself and through feedback that I am a "positive influence" who can see the good and possibilities of most things and will willingly point those out to others in efforts to assist others and avoid dealing with my own problems. I'm excessively adaptable and, unfortunately, as much as I've tried to not be, evasive of conflict in the sense that I will always take the longest route to the end if it seems most free of obstacles I "can't" deal with and of course, to maintain my sense of comfort and a general "half connect, half disconnect" to the people in my life. This is inherently positive outlook. I'm willing to shaft myself enough to where I am no longer really a person and have no sense of identity (which I've even deflected isn't important because I know I have no clue how to build nor maintain an energy), but merged with my goals and the goals of those I love, which relates to 9s merging quality and also the attachment triad. I eat my own desires to avoid conflict and maintain the people I care about to an extreme degree, which is very fitting of unhealthy 9.
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  8. LII
  9. Forgive me for having somewhat of a half assed argument (as I still have a ways to go with understanding socionics, which is why I am open to contrary analysis from others), but while not a "perfect fit" I think LII is probably the "best fit." Ne creative I think is most likely due having an angular thinking style. One of my few talents is looking at things from a variety of perspectives (especially those unconnected to myself) and rely on that ability to build a pool of logic/models that I can work off to move through life comfortably. It's easy for me to judge consequence because I can see what potential the things around me hold and work off of that in order to judge what seems most feasible and what doesn't (and move forward when possible, though I get stuck in the thinking phase because thinking is easier than doing). Se polR is also relatively fitting as well, as I have the presence of a ghost and often disappear into thin air while existing in plain space. I'm not forceful in the slightest and, while I have been called intimidating before, when I try to use the force of my will to manipulate the environment it is often half-hazard or not taken seriously. I am a thinker at best, pushing myself into action (unless I have a goal, then there's no problem) is a struggle and often extends into long term planning, resource allocation, and manipulation in order to pursue my goals. I'm more likely to make a long and detailed plan to avoid an obstacle then plow it down myself, which is why I think my Se is shit. I relate to Ni of course, but seem to value the Ne-Si axis above that I believe.
  11. Ti dominance seems to show up in my necessity to break things down in order to do things and constantly have sets of models I can rely on to work though life. I spend a gross time creating these models by studying others like subjects and other systems I feel I must understand in order to progress through life and am nothing without these self constructed models. Many of them are models of people and emotions, as those are massive weakpoints in my life. I rely on gaining as many perspectives as possible and meshing those together in order to make my models general enough to move through to work through real life but also accurate and unbiased by myself and others (at least as much as I can, I'm no robot of course). I'm highly structured to an annoying degree and relate to the rule and structure orientation of LxI. Fe makes sense too, as I considered the possibility that I could be misordering the functions I figured I valued. I am capable of manipulating the emotional environment (mostly to reduce conflict and get people to agree with me so I can push my agenda) and, under stress/dire straights especially am pretty decent at doing that. My expression is erratic and inconsistent (to the point where people used to literally comment that I made them uneasy/peg me as a potential "school shooter" jokingly in passing because unless I'm friendly with you, random bursts of expression really catch people off guard I guess). I don't think I value Te-Fi because my Fi is literally the worst. I don't really have preferences for things and live primarily apathetically (mostly because as a child, having preferences was detrimental circumstantially). Relationships are a lost cause, as I don't prioritize them nor understand their dynamics. My behavior rarely changes between "close" and "non-close" friends because I don't pay attention to this aspect of relationships and don't generally value people enough in general (ie. attachment is pretty difficult in general, friends have asked before if I even like them).
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  13. INTP
  14. Much of the above (despite socionics and mbti being different theories with definitions only overlapping some places) could probably be used as an addition to my argument for INTP. It has come to my attention (though others debating with me and video based analysis) that I have an "imposter complex" when it comes to my Ti usage (by standard of mbti). My default stance for dealing with the world is through almost automatic analysis and generation of models. Much of my goals and weaknesses surround trying to be as "objective" and clearheaded as possible with the strong detriment of ignoring my feelings entirely and ignoring societal values such as connectivity and loyalty. My Si, while preferred and heavily relied upon, is almost exclusively used in a neurotic fashion, leading me to hyperfixate on generating structure and trying to predict the world around me through obtaining as much information as possible and using that to simulate possibilities. I enjoy and find ease in analyzing things from multiple perspectives and enjoy playing with ideas and theory to test the limits and expansive ability of ideas. When I allow myself to work off the information I have obtained from this "play," I am often more successful than when I resume my more normal, constipated and internalized prediction seeking attitude (since it is more congruent with my natural cognition, but devalued for some reason). It was mentioned how Fe is my demon and indeed, my almost neurotic analysis and patterning of people and their reactions, since is my only means of dealing with them in any form exhibits this well.
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  16. FF Ti-Si SCBP
  17. So far, the typings I have received (through live and video interview) have been FF Ti-Si SCBP, FF Ti-Ne CSPB, and MF Ti-Ni SBCP. From the get go, the double fem modality I think is fairly obvious, my De is obviously more quiet and my attention to detail and tendency to delve into that detail is also quite low (although the argument made sense for M sensing in the case of Se to be fair). I have reason to believe that I am an info dom, with sleep(S) being an active and clear part of my functioning process and both blast(B) an consume(C) being somewhat interchangeable (primarily because apathy has wacked my C and I have actively worked to not be god awful at B in efforts to get people to not dismiss my thoughts). While I now recognize Ne as a function I use in a healthy and quality fashion, it seems to come secondary to my Si in terms of default usage. My Si is clearly worse, but I place a lot of importance on prediction and organizing knowledge and my musings into models so that I can tackle "any situation" and understand as many perspectives as I can (with Ti-Ne being a secondary, but prominent mechanism of action).
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  19. sp/so
  20. I think I'm a pretty obvious sx blind by most merits. I struggle intensely and am somewhat averse to making attachments to just about anything, have a version of "enjoyable intensity" that is far below most's limits of enthuse, am deeply disconnected from desire and when initially reading sx descriptions thought they described a person who could not possibly exist. I am not "sx averse" in the sense that I enjoy intimacy, do crave thrill, and can connect with sx individuals in a way that has been satisfactory, and general can enjoy "sx" activities, I just have a much lower threshold for overwhelming than them. And of course if those sx things weren't there, I wouldn't feel lost. Sp/sx has been suggested by many friends, but I don't buy being soc blind for myself.
  22. Sp vs soc is a bit harder because I am a drastically insecure individual and I would not consider myself healthy in either instinct. Regardless, sp seems to work most in front position because I am fixated on boundaries between myself and everything else. I am very aware of my mental resources and unwilling to compromise them for most things (unless they are required to maintain some other mental or physical resource). I'm pretty consistently considered grounded, work oriented, and aloof to others. I don't have much understanding of social dynamics, but I seem considerably more open to them than soc blind individuals. I basically live in a basement by mentality and am an "alien" to my own culture because I am too lazy to become interested in others or culture's pursuits, hence why I think sp/so is most fitting. On two occasions I was suggested to be a sp blind 5, but not being that "good" at sp doesn't mean it's not the biggest focus in my life of the three instincts.
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  24. VLEF
  25. I am open to opinions on this one. I have pegged myself as 1V purely because most of my life has been dictated by having a strong sense of personal vision and desire to "resolve" the blight that has tainted my life. I am my goal, quite literally after being forced to drop this goal (for health reasons), I have become depersonalized. It took long to drop that as well just because others opinions don't matter on that. I struggle with motivation a lot without a goal and in general wouldn't consider myself an action oriented individual, but idk a better fit than V.
  27. The others orders I am unsure of. F, superficially, seems like something I don't care much about. Aesthetics? Don't care. Health? I'm sort of crap at handling that, though I am a sp dom (ie. I am going to go to bed on time, I keep track of energy reserve, etc). I did make an aesthetics blog for fun/out of boredom though? It's kind of something I don't care much about.
  29. 3E fits because I have the emotional intelligence of a dead cat. I'm consistently having a stroke over my emotions because I have few preferences and they all feel identical? I don't necessarily ask people about them though.
  31. I love hearing others perspectives on things and play too much with theory. I am "excessively open" to new ideas and trust my ability to logic through things most of the time, so long as my sources are not purely myself (for sake of objectivity). People typed me as 6 for awhile because I seemed super doubtful though, so I could be off.
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