Glimglam doth Flimflam the Green Man(2)

>Day Evil Con Carne in Equestria.
>You are Anon.
>Your body, your bulwark against the vile Illithid-in-ponyform….
>Is a jar.
>Your sworn nemesis has placed your sludge-form in a jar.
>Even painted a suit and smiley face on it to spite you.
>Oh how you hate her.
>Now she has taken you hostage.
>Something she calls “a Fun-Day Outing.”
>Truly she is some sort inhuman monster.
>Fueled only by the purest form of sadistic hatred for all that is Good.
>A testament to her evil is that she has placed you in a magic bubble to parade her victory over you around town.
>”Hey Daisy, how’s it going?”
>”S’Alright, slow day but a good one… Whats with the jelly jar?”
>”Oh! This is Anon, he had an accident the other day and is still reconstituting.”
>LIAR!
>She somehow outwitted you and sabotaged your Sonic Agitator!
>”…I see.”
>”I’m taking him up to the hill to fly kites!”
>The pink flower horse looks uncomfortable.
>Clearly she is sympathetic to your plight.
>She will be spared in The End Times.
>”See you around, Daisy.”
>Your tormentor continues her march.

>Be Starlight Glimmer
>Today is going to be great.
>At least you hope it will be.
>Truth be told, you’re kind of worried.
>When you found Anon, he was a puddle that was shambling around his home on the edge the town.
>Lights were out, it was dusty, a bunch of nicknacks lying haphazardly about.
>The place was a disaster!
>And poor Anon was so scared and helpless…
>…
>Well, thats why you got the jar!
>And its a big jar!
>It had to be!
>Anon’s a big guy.
>Especially for you.
>Oh my, that is fun!
>Anon’s culture is so strangely appealing.
>Maybe when he’s capable of speech again you can ask where it all comes from .
>Nonetheless, today you’re gonna make it a great day.
>And you’re gonna do it with your new friend Anon.
>With kites!
>Be Anonymous.
>This hill is too green.
>Sky too blue.
>This is all sickening.
>And this jar offers you no means of escape.
>Damn thing is hermetically sealed.
>Starlight placed a kite’s spool before you, weighed down with rocks.
>Her cruelty knows no bounds.
>”So, I’ve got planned some great things today, Anon. Great things!”
>Great would be Starlight watching her world be torn asunder while you laugh madly.
>”You may have guessed, but first we’re gonna fly kites-“
>Her vile magic adjusts the trajectory of the kite.
>”-then in the afternoon, there’s this new place opening nearby I thought would be fun to try, ever heard of tartar? No idea what it is, but it sounds exotic and the Gryphon running the place seems like a nice guy.”
>Wait—what!?
>Tartar? As in raw meat?
>As in, Beef Tartar.?
>…Or Horse Tartar.
>Oh.
>Oh yes.
>Yes, this will do nicely.
>Vengeance to the tune of Sweeney Todd~
>How decadently twisted.
>”…Anyways once lunch is handled, I was thinking we’d go see a movie. Probably something sci-fi —Ooh! I just remembered that Hyper Space Hyper Wars: The Revolt of Lunaris is playing! That should be fun!”
>Damnable historical fiction.
>Lunaris was a fool to rebel, her sisters had greater numbers in both militaries and planets under their command.
>Why, even with the support of Gargamox’s Dethkallers, she lacked the means of holding the line against the loyalists, let alone take on the Cosmo Militia.
>Just a one-sided conflict that ended in billions of ponies calling her a Martyr.
>Fools.
>All of them.
>Now Tyrannia on the other hand-
>”…Can’t say I like the new lore, though. The fact they tried to make it out like Tyrannia was secretly doing all her atrocities in the name of marekind is incredibly dumb. I mean, she was in league with demons! Space Demons! Demons don’t care about things like unity and friendship, just hurting ponies…”
>The knowledge that the writers of HSHW would do something like that to your favorite faction leader just—!
>Wait, is Glimmer crying?
>”…You know Anon, sometimes I feel like Twilight and her friends don’t actually trust or like me.”
>You bubble in confusion.
>Also because just regained the means of gas-processing.
>”Like, they only interact with me or hang around me just to keep an eye on me. As if I’m gonna go back to brainwashing ponies or messing with time again.”
>She’s actually crying.
>Over feeling that her friends are her wardens.
>…
>What kind of insecure, self-persecuting, weirdo is this horse?
>”But thats why I like you Anon. You want to be around me, you even seek me out when I feel down and make me feel better… You really care about me.”
>You are Anonymous.
>You are frothing with so much anger at the idea that Starlight has misinterpreted your assassination attempts as ‘friendliness.’
>The pressure of the gas you were generating causes the jar’s lid to explode.
>A hand, your hand, pushes forth from the slime and grasps at the cold air.

>Be Glimmy
>You are shocked to see Anon’s jar suddenly burst open.
>Especially since there is now a partially formed, green hand grasping around violently!
>How could this happen?
>Why did this happen?
>Could it…?
>Could it be because of what you said?
>Was your confession of appreciation the catalyst needed to push Anon to speed up his recovery?
>If that’s the case then…
>Wow!
>Friendship really is magic!
>You’re tearing up from the beauty of it all~!
>You grab the jar and hug it.
“Keep going Anon! Let my love fuel your healing!”
>The goo that once was an alien stallion from another dimension bubbles more vigorously and the hand raises as an arm grows from the sludge.
>It reaches over the rim of the jar starts stroking your mane.
>Sure it’s a little slimy, but he’s petting you!
>HE’S PETTING YOU~!
>Oh its so wonderfully romantic~!
>Today is the best day ever.
>You spilled your heart out to Anon and he responded with physical affection!
>Though a part of you is concerned it might just’ve been him trying out his new limb.
>…
>Nah, those were totally intentional pettings and chin scratchies.
>Doki-doki is at maximum~!
>He still going t

>Be Rage-Slime
>KILL
>MAIM
>TORTURE
>KIIIIILLLL

>Be the Happiest Little Pony known as Starlight Glimmer

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_eiwpZS3Vqg

>You went on a whirlwind adventure of fun with Anon.
>First, you went to the Tartar place.
>It was nice, your meal was this kinda tough jelly that wasn’t very sweet but definitely tasted good.
>Kept getting weird looks from passerbys, but it was okay because you liked it.
>Anon cleaned his plate and generated eyes.
>You kinda wish you used acrylic paint instead of permanent ink on his jar.
>You can’t remove the drawn on eyes.
>Continuing down the list, next you two went to the theatre.
>The movie was just as bad as you thought, fortunately it was saved by wardrobe malfunctions and acting more wooden than Flutterhy’s Cabin.
>A bad film can still be a hilarious film, especially when the lead’s breastplate kept popping off whenever the gestures got too enthusiastic.
>Apparently, Anon does not handle bad movies well.
>He kept throwing popcorn at the screen and at you.
>Then again, the foals in the next row were very appreciative of the snack-rain.
>Why are you second guessing this altruist alien?
>He’s so selfless and kind.
>You don’t deserve him.
>Next, the two of you went to a chocolatier shop!
>Okay, it was just Sugarcube Corner.
>But it was Chocolate Day!
>Chocolate things all over the place!
>Pinkie, for whatever reason, had covered herself in chocolate.
>Something about no wrong way to fantasize, Celestia forbid you learn what that means.
>Regardless, you and Anon picked up a case of assorted chocolates.
>Being the gentlestallion that he is, Anon carried the box back to the castle.