Dadonequus Discord Part 239

Erf1111 Aug 21st, 2016 (edited) 318 Never
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  2. (Author's Note: this is a small crossover done in the world of
  3. >you come out from behind the open door now that the coast was clear.
  4. "No, there was that time when she tried to seal me...but seriously, what just happened?"
  5. >Discord turned to face you, with a arrogant smirk on his face "Simple, I finally trounced Twilight down to her very core. Who would have thought that all I had to do to win was tell her her week with you only made things worse..which is funny because it did actually do that." He chuckles to himself
  6. "I guess,'re pretty petty Discord. You couldn't let the whole thing go, huh?"
  7. >You weren't saying it as a way to sound like a lecture, you weren't even surprised, you just kept it casual.
  8. >"Of course not! Aside from it being fun, she almost ruined everything...well" Discord turned to look towards the horizon as he puts his arms to his hips. "That should finally put an end to her trying to "Better" you." He let's out a victory laugh.
  9. "Yeaaahh....ok. Really, I don't know how to feel about this. In fact, I feel myself leaning actually"
  10. >That's what you found surprising
  11. "I mean, I guess I should feel bad that you made Twilight crap herself. But, geez. She's just so fucking nosy, I'm actually hoping this gets her to stop. I like her as a friend, that's fine're right about the chimera. I would have turned him into fucking stew if I had the horn. Was Twilight always like this? I don't even remember"
  12. >"Oh, she can be. Twilight is the type of pony who would try to force you to have other friends if she thought a friend you had was no good. Really, I question the decision to make HER the princess of friendship."
  13. "I you think Fluttershy will be ok?"
  14. >"Pffft!" Discord waved his arm out "She'll be fine. Twilight will get over it. And everything will go on as normal with the added benefit of her finally leaving you alone with how you act. She should have realized her ways would never apply to a human"
  15. >Wut? you raise an eyebrow
  16. "She didn't even know I'm a human"
  18. >Discord turns over to you and rolls his eyes "A pointless detail Anon, because as you heard. The cutie mark is what actually mattered. And only a human such as yourself would be able to attain it. The rest is superfluous."
  19. >Ok, you understood what he meant now. But there was still one more thing in your mind.
  20. "I get it, ok. Still, I'm surprised you actually won that though. Twilight didn't even really fight you. If I was her, I would have mentioned the time when I got sent to the hospital....the first time"
  21. >Discord waggled his talon left and right at you as he smirked "Ahhh, but that would be pointless. You were in the safe town of Ponyville...which admittingly isn't actually too safe...but safe enough. And then add in the fact that it was the decision of two fathers to make a punishment befitting your little outburst. So that would mean I was doing my job correctly. Nopony could guess what would happen, but. When it did happen. You successfully repelled the danger and saved the young filly. No argument to be had there. And she can't use that Glitter pony, you did where six ponies failed. A amazing feat indeed. In other words, although I don't care for it too much, you've taken the idea of chaos and twisted it for the purpose of good and justice....ehhhh, not exactly the best use but good enough to use against Twilight. So..really. I have you to thank for this victory." Discord bows. "Good show, my son..hehehehe"
  22. >Ehhh, you didn't much care for the fact he won. Nor could you truly drudge up any care for what happened to Twilight. Just a small amount of guilt hovered over you.'d get over it. There was still the problem with Chrysalis floating in your mind. And the captain being around Applebloom. The only thing that was actually relieving today was that for once, FOR ONCE, apple filly was mature. And then there was...
  23. "Yeah yeah, whatever. So what now? What happened to that thing you were working on anyway?"
  25. >Discord became excited by the mention of it "OOHHHhhohohoho, funny you mention that actually. I did have it ready for tomorrow. Buuuuut, I'm in such a good mood. I wouldn't mind showing you my greatest work now! You are curious...aren't you?"
  26. >You were
  27. "I am, and I did say I'd help with whatever it is. But, it can't take too long. Especially since you said I'd be sleeping over at Fluttershy's tonight."
  28. >"Ohhh, it won't take too long. And besides, I promise you this will be interesting." Discord snaps his talons, opening a portal into some sort of space like void. "But, before we depart. Do you have any actually hangups about what just happened?"
  29. >you shake your head. No, it'd be fine.
  30. "Nope, Twilight should leave me alone about wanting to make me, erm..Can't think of a name for it right now. But I'm just glad that this should be the final nail in the coffin. I just feel that maybe I should check up on her once after we're done so she doesn't feel too bad. I'm not a heartless monster you know, I still care"
  31. >"ehhh, you do what you feel is right. As long as you know what is what, then I don't care what you do. Now then, step inside...and prepare for the most fun you'll ever have....ever"
  32. >You start to walk through the portal
  33. "Ever huh? If you say so, I trust you Discord. As wrong as that sounds, I trust you"
  35. >You almost felt a little bad just walking into this. It was like, it just happened. And then it was done with. You were sure it'd be brought up later. But for now, Discord seemed pretty excited for this. You expected a trick or a trap as you stepped through into the starry void. But instead, you are met with a few floating doors.
  36. "....uhhhhh, what's with the doors? Are we in the dr...oh shit"
  37. >You smirked, this couldn't be..could it?
  38. "Discord, are we gonna fuck with pony dreams? That's fucking awesome! And...wait! Wait...fuck...we can't do this. Luna would know"
  39. >Discord gave you a gentle pat on the head as he stepped forward to present the doors "As cowardly as that sounds, it's also nothing you need to worry about. These aren't the doors of pony dreams. These my dear Anon.." Discord flies up, producing explosions and fireworks "ARE DOORS TO OTHER DIMENSIONS!"
  40. >W-woah
  41. "What?! Really? ohhh, shit. Are you saying we're gonna fuck around in other Equestrias? Wait...wouldn't the other versions of you get pissed about that?I figured they wouldn't want others doing chaos on their turf and taking the credit"
  42. >"Ahhh, but again, it's nothing to worry about. These doors were created by some foolish ponies from the dimension we split off from. It seems they were messing with a time spell one too many times. And created these doors which lead to different futures. Normally impossible to access, I nabbed hold of them before they became forever lost. And now, you can choose one and forge a fun little adventure While I watch from the sidelines. That's the plan. What do you think?"
  44. >wut?
  45. >Not only did this sound dangerous. But it sounds like the ones who even created these doors was Starlight...and possibly Twilight. Was that the season finale? Twilight jumping futures? No way she could have seen all of these through. It wouldn't fit the runtime. And even then, what futures are we talking about?
  46. "Woah woah woah. Hold on, so what you're saying is you're going to send me in one of these doors to fend for myself while you watch like it's some television show?"
  47. >Discord nodded "Exactly, Doing it myself would be boring since I'm already so powerful. But you Anon are not, and yet have the knowledge required to possibly survive any of these doors. In fact, thats where the fun comes in. You choose a random door, solve it's issue, then come back and we'll call it a day. It won't even take long. Time in this realm moves at a different rate than our Equestria. We'll be done in time for dinner. Doesn't that sound amazing? Think of it! The mystery, the adventure, the intrigue! ohhhhh, how could you not want to give it a go?"
  48. >....that was pretty convincing...but still.
  49. "That does sound cool, but..what about the horn? what if there's too many dangers for me to handle in one day?"
  50. >"Ahhhh...mmnn" Discord looked a little troubled about that himself "That is a little troublesome. For you see the horn would be a lot weaker due to being away from it's source. And I'd still only give you a once per day charge. But...if you do come close to eradication...well, I can't help with that either. It would take me some time to get you pulled out. But come on Anon....Fuuuunnnn!" Discord presents the doors again, chuckling nervously.
  51. >......dammit
  52. "Alright, alright. That sounds incredibly dangerous. But fine, I doubt whatever is behind those doors is THAT dangerous anyway and I am super interested. But, just in case....I need a partner"
  54. >"That, I don't mind. Especially since I'm going to assume you mean your dear dear "sister" " Discord didn't seem hesitant at all about that. He even grinned.
  55. >And you nodded
  56. "Exactly, the closer she sticks to me the better. Plus, she'd be able to help me fight off whatever danger we might run in...PLUS...I need to talk to her about this whole sleepover thing. I gotta know what she's up to and she's not going to be able to run away when she realizes I'd be the only way back to our Equestria. So, you're gonna make that happen?"
  57. >"Your wish is my command Anon" Discord chuckles evilly
  58. "Good...also, can you make sure she thinks that you forced her into it? I don't need to hear her bitch the entire trip about how it was my fault"
  59. >"Double done, besides. I do like taking the blame sometimes. Besides, it'll be more fun this way if she thinks she's along for the ride by my own design. Anything else?"
  60. >There was one more thing, beside the doors....there was a window.
  61. "Yeah, what's with the window?"
  62. >"Oh that? quite the oddity actually" Discord sounded unsure "It just sprang up, from what I can gather however, it's a pathway into an Equestria where..similar to this one...I had brought a human over. But, I have no idea what that actually entails"
  64. "WOAH WHAT?!"
  65. >You start stepping towards the window, now this sounded great.
  66. >"Anon, what are you doing? I wouldn't recommend going through there"
  68. >You were tapping at the window, then start to slowly open it.
  69. "Relax man, I gotta see what's through here. Another human? How could I not check that shit out? I'll just pop in, take a look, see how shitty his life is compared to mine, pop back out and then we'll do the door thing. It won't take long."
  70. >Discord sighed, and started rubbing his temples with his talons "...Alright...don't say I didn't warn you"
  71. >Whatever, what the fuck did he know? You knew humans...YOU WERE ONE.
  72. >hehehe, this was gonna be cool. Fuck worrying about Twilight. This was Anon time. you'd worry about it afterwards.
  73. >You step through the window and......plop on your face.
  74. "Ngh..D-D-..mnnghhh"
  75. >You get up, in a grump. Goddammit...what the fuck! Already your good mood was starting to spoil.
  76. "W-where even am I?"
  77. >You look around, and realized you were in the hallways of Canterlot Castle. And looking upon the window, it still had a soft glow. The portal still must be open.
  78. "Huh..."
  79. >And nothing looked different
  80. "....boring so far...and why here? Fuck, how am I supposed to get to Ponyville from here?"
  82. >And as you looked around. You realized something else. The entire thought zapped your mind like lightning. Making you dart behind a pillar and hide.
  83. "...Shit...they also don't know me here either. If I get caught.....oohh god. That'd be a lot to explain"
  84. >You hid behind that pillar, contemplating your next move. And as you did, you heard a cute form of humming coming from around the bend.
  85. "..hmm?"
  86. >It was....a bat filly? Those exist?...well..yeah...they'd be part of Luna's guard set...but a filly? just wandering the castle? She was a cute grey filly with purple bat wings. Golden eyes and blonde mane. and cute sock hooves to go along with her grey coat.
  87. "Huh....that's adorable...also.."
  88. >That was your ticket. Just go up to her, talk to her, make friends and then get out of the castle unscathed while being able to enter the castle without a problem to get back through the portal. She might even have info on the human.
  89. >You wait for her to pass, and then slowly start to step up to her. And noticed something odd. She had some tech on her. looked like some sort of walkie talkie radio.
  90. >You then call out to her
  91. "Hey! Hold on a second. Can I talk to you?"
  93. >The bat filly's ear stiffen up. And she turns to look at you. the moment she does. She beams to you a sickingly sweet smile "Anon!"
  94. >oh...god......
  95. "H-huh?"
  96. >"Anon! Hey!....wait" She tilted her head, massively confused "I thought you were in Ponyville, how'd you get back here so fast....and why?"
  97. >.......ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS?! IT WAS YOU?! IT'S ANOTHER YOU?!...or was it someone with the same name? and same...oh god...this could either be good or bad.
  98. "Uhmmm...I...just couldn't stay away?"
  99. >Now she seemed really confused "That's weird, your moms didn't mention it to my mom...and what's with that dopey style with your mane?"
  100. >Dopey?!..and moms?
  101. "...what's wrong with my mane? It's always been this way!"
  102. >You snapped back
  103. >Which seemed to startle her
  104. >"Hey, I was just saying. And....what's up with your voice. It sounds kinda different."
  105. >Different?
  106. "Uhhmm...s-sore throat?"
  107. >...ok, this may have not been the best idea.
  108. >"...uh-huh...and...." That's when she noticed it, and started to take caution "....did you stain your flank?"
  109. >You just blink emptily at her
  110. "........e-erm. yes? Look..erm..can you just point me to Princess Celestia and Luna..please? since we're friends?"
  111. >...but that only seemed to make her suspicious
  112. >"Princess?...I thought you hated that title stuff........hmmnnnn"
  113. >And then a voice started coming through her radio, it was hard to make out...but it struck you as odd. How the hell did she have tech. Was this a tech savvy Equestria?
  114. "......So...that was like...your dad..right?"
  115. >But she didn't respond with words, she suddenly just leaned towards you as the slit of her eyes thinned. She then began to hiss loudly at you.
  117. >Jesus fucking christ! What the fuck was up with this thing!? It was scary as shit, enough to make you step back.
  118. "W-what did I say?!"
  119. >As you stepped back, the bat filly began to step forward. She looked vicious as fucking shit.
  120. >"I can't believe I didn't realize you were a changeling! I should have noticed the moment you said thats what that stupid mane style always looked like. So what are you up to? Hmm? You better talk now or I'm going to put even more holes in you, HISSSSSSS!" She bares her fangs at you
  121. >WHAT THE FUCK MAN! THIS IS A FUCKING FILLY! Nah fuck this, bats are insane. Even the cute little ones are out for blood.
  122. "L-look, I don't want to fight ok? How about we just forget this ever happened. I'm not even a changeling. Geez, relax!"
  123. >"Liar! You can't trick me. Not like anypony wouldn't have realized you weren't Anon anyway. That's the worst disguise I've ever seen. You couldn't trick me with such a dumb looking face"
  124. >...oh come on. Everyone else thought you were adorable. Now she was just being a cunt.
  125. "Will you stop! Geez, look. Just relax ok, I'm gonna go...ok?"
  126. >"You're not going anywhere! I'm gonna find out what you're up to! And if you don't tell me. Then I'm gonna beat you up! I'll beat you up REALLY hard. And then when my mom gets you. oh yeah, you REALLY don't want that to happen. So you better fess up now if you don't wanna get hurt super bad!" She just kept approaching as you stepped back.
  127. "O-ok..Look..the truth is....HOLY CRAP IT'S QUEEN CHRYSALIS!"
  128. >you yell out as you point behind her
  129. >"Huh?" She stops to look back
  130. "Ha! Ciao you dumb stupid bat! Haha!"
  131. >You turn around and bolt towards the window.
  133. >As you are about to reach it, you make a dive.
  134. >But, right when you were about to pass through. You feel something pull you down. What's even scarier, you felt something grip your back legs as you are pulled down and slammed onto your belly.
  135. "O-ogh...Geez..what happened?...what's..with..."
  136. >You pull at your legs, but they wouldn't budge
  137. "W-what?"
  138. >You look back, to see the now arrogantly grinning bat filly. She had...WHAT THE FUCK WERE THOSE?! WERE THOSE MECHANICAL HANDS?! SHE GRABBED YOU WITH...WHERE THE FUCK DID THEY EVEN COME FROM?!
  139. >"Kekekeke~, who's dumb and stupid now?"
  140. "Where did you even get those?!"
  141. >"I'm not gonna tell you that you monster. Tell me what you're up to. Or I'm just gonna slam you over and over! And it's gonna hurt! So better talk quick!" She warns.
  142. >This crazy..fucking....bitch
  144. >You try pulling your legs away. but those mechanical hands held them damned tightly. This Anon, if he built these hands. He was pretty damn good at making them tough.
  145. "Listen, Just let me go, and we can forget this whoOOOOOOOAAAAUMPH!"
  146. >The bat filly raises you up midsentence and slams you back into the ground "Wrong answer!"
  147. "N-ngh..."
  148. >You twitch in pain
  149. "L-look, I'm not a changeling ok? I-I'm an Anon from another dimension. I can prrrrOOOOOOOOOMPH!"
  150. >She slams you again
  151. >"Wrong answer again! It's like you enjoy being slammed to the ground or something...or maybe you're just trained to resist interrogation techniques. Y'know that won't help you against my mom right? You better start fessing up now before she gets here"
  152. >The bat filly..THIS bat filly...was really goddamn insane. Were all bat ponies so damn vicious?
  153. >And you were done playing nice...
  154. "I'm gonna slap your shIIIIIIIIIIIII"
  155. >She didn't even give you any chance this time, all she heard was "slap" and raised you up again "Geez, maybe I was wrong. Maybe you're just stupid"
  156. >She goes to slam you back to the ground. But you slip away from her grip and instead end up getting flung out the window "O-oops!"
  157. >Ha!
  158. "Seeya later Fangs! Haha!"
  159. >You wave to her as you are basked into the warm light.
  160. > you look around, you notice you weren't back in the void.
  161. >there was sky, the sun, clouds. The castle walls ahead of you, and the mountain behind you, and of course, below you was a fountain, white brick, grass.
  162. ".....She threw me through the wrong window.....huh"
  163. >And then you started plummeting
  166. >You started flailing wildly as you began to plummet.
  168. >You couldn't even get your horn on top of your face, everytime you reached for it it just vibrated away.
  170. >You still could reach for the grappling hook arm. You quickly spin and reach into your saddle bag and sift through it until you nab it and put it on.
  171. "Ha Ha!"
  172. >You laugh as you raise your leg triumphantly
  173. "Now...All I gottaFHHGTHGHGG"
  174. >As you began to aim, you actually had no more time to react as you plummet right into the fountain. Hard enough that your entire body was in pain. You just hung there for a moment...underwater.
  175. >This was it....the end of a saga. You were going to die here....
  176. >You just started to drift....nearing darkness.
  177. >That is, until you could hear the bat filly's voice, but only barely.
  178. >No....fuck this.
  179. >You open your weren't going to fucking lose to a goddamn filly.
  180. >Holding the last of your breath. You sift through your bag while underwater and find an appropriate weapon.
  181. >A small box of unmeltable ice cream, this must have been the lunch Discord poofed into your bag...perfect.
  182. >You slowly raise your head out of the water and spot your target. She was looking around for you. Her ears were turning every which way. Looking for a sound.
  183. >As you raise your head out, you prepared to toss the box.
  185. >But the bat filly was quick. She turned towards you and pointed at you with alarm "Found you! You noisy morSDFDSFSD".
  186. >You didn't even hesitate, you hurled the box right at her before she could react. Smearing ice cream all over her face. Making her wobble and whine "Ahhh! It's so cold!"
  187. >That wasn't the only thing that was cold.
  188. >You jump out of the water and rush right at her. Making a jumping turn to buck her right at her side, sending her flying backwards.
  189. "Gotcha!"
  190. >you snicker as you see her flying back...but your grin quickly drops as she managed you catch herself in mid air. How?! HOW?! That cheap shot should have knocked her down!
  191. >And...o-oh god....the ice cream on her face was..melting?! Her fury was so was melting the unmeltable ice cream.
  193. "Good geez! What the hell is wrong wiOH CRAP!"
  194. >You dive to the left as she swoops in, fangs bared. As soon as she misses, she hisses and turns towards you. "STAY STILL!"
  196. >She just relentlessly keeps swooping at you. With you nearing getting hit with each dodge. You couldn't do this forever. And she was as angry as well...a fucking bat.
  197. >You tried going for your horn again, but the moment you took a second to try to get it on your face. She swooped in at near sonic speeds and tackled you, and started trying to bite at your face.
  199. >"REEEEEEEEEEEEE!" She hissed, she was full on berserk.
  200. >You had to dodge your head as she leaned in for each bite. Each closer to your face or neck. This wasn't at all like your erotica where a bat person would gently nibble on you. this was full on Dracula!
  201. >After a few more dodges, you manage to get your back legs under her and push her off. She was still standing however. Just sliding back as she gazed at you with vicious eyes. Breathing hard. She was calming down, but not by much. "Ngh....grrrrr.....MNNN?!"
  202. >You weren't even going to give her a chance to strike again. You move in and try using your own moves. Doing jabs and punches were difficult, but you worked them into your bucks. Unfortunately for you, this fucking filly must have some soldier blood in her or something. real high end stuff. She was dodging all your attacks as she looked for an opening. You did your best not to give her one.
  203. "! I'm..not..a...changeling!"
  204. >"Liar!...Liar!....Hooves on fire!....Grrrr..Maybe I should do that....Just set you on fire!...Grr......wait a second"
  205. >The bat filly remembered her "assets" and with another dodge, she slugs you right in the face with her mechanical hand. It was such a great realization for her that she actually smiled and cackled "Kekekekekeke~, I forgot I had these"
  207. >You slide backwards back into the side of the fountain as the bat filly, now ecstatic about that smashing punch, calmed herself enough to focus.
  208. "G-geez...that right hook...mnnnn..."
  209. >You slowly stand, you couldn't take her on with what you had. You could use the probably should.
  210. >She gestured the hand to make a "Come at me" motion. "I wasn't kidding, I'm really gonna pound you. Don't think you're getting off easy, I tried to be nice but you just had to be the biggest idiot in the world. You could never be as good as Anon, no matter how hard you try to look like him!"
  211. >Nah fuck it....if you waste your horn on her. You might not be able to use it to escape a bigger threat. Besides, she wanted to use gadgets? had one on right now.
  212. "Shut up! Geez, You're so annoying. I'm gonna tell you right now, I'm the best "Anon" That ever was. And I'm gonna prove it!"
  213. >She raised an eyebrow at you in disbelief "...and how are you going to do that?"
  214. "Like this!"
  215. >You raise your leg and fire the grappling hook straight at her
  216. "Think fast!"
  218. >And she did...she caught the hook.
  219. >"kekekekekeke~, hey idiot! it's not good to announce your attacks." She cackled, she was back to being in a good mood. "After I'm done with you, I'm gonna show your mangled butt to my mom. She's going to be so happy! I can't wait!"
  220. >She started to pull at the rope, FUCK!
  221. >You tried to resist, but you couldn't compete with mechanical strength. With every pull, you came closer to another knuckle sandwich. "..And look at this thing. It's so terrible. You stink at inventions too, Anon could so improve this"
  223. >You quickly flick the switch to retract the line. It jerks so hard that even the bat filly was surprised, and starts hurtling towards you headfirst. "GYYYYAAAAHH?! WHAT HAPPENED?!"
  224. >What indeed. You weren't prepared for the bat missile that was heading towards you.
  225. >And as if you could feel it in a slow motion shot. The bat filly's head slams right into yours. She flies hard enough to slam then skid off your forehead. Yelping in pain as she flies past you after impact, flipping about and slamming onto the ground. She twitches, then with a groan, stops moving.
  226. "Eyyowch! Geez...ogh....why?....why my head?..always my....huh?"
  227. >No screeching? no anger?
  228. >You look behind yourself to see the bat filly has been K.O.ed
  229. "No way...."
  230. >You walk over to her and move her onto her back. She was breathing...she looked so peaceful and adorable.
  231. >And the best part won.
  232. "HAHAHAHAHAHA! MY THICK HEAD IS FINALLY USEFUL FOR ONCE!...wait....that doesn't sound right.....ehh"
  233. >Yeah, that just made you sound stupid.
  234. >You sigh, and then look over the cute little filly. She was so fluffy and adorable. And considering her fascination with this world's Anon. She no doubt loved him....which gave you an evil idea.
  236. >You put yourself on top of her. And gently pressed your body onto hers. She groaned softly, and began to blush.
  237. >You then leaned in, and gave her a deep kiss, even pushing in your tongue. oh man...her tongue was weird. it was slim and slippery. as you pulled back. there was a trail of saliva from her mouth to yours.
  238. >you then grin, get off of her, and make a proclamation.
  240. >With that, you moved her unconscious form near the fountain and leaned her head on it's wall for others to find. You were done here. You didn't want to tangle with this bat filly's mom or this world's Anon without proper preparation....perhaps another time.
  241. "Seeya..."
  242. >You snicker, launching your grappling up towards the glowing window.
  243. >As you retract the line to raise upwards. You look down at the fallen filly. You hoped she would remember you in someway....especially that kiss...nehehehehe
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