Hi! My name is..(huh?) My name is.. (who?)
My name is.. [scratches] Steve Jobs
Hi! My name is.. (huh?) My name is.. (what?)
My name is.. [scratches] Steve Jobs

Hi kids, do you like jaundice?
Wanna see me steal the livers from a bunch
of sick little bald kids?

Wanna get dialysis and inject antibiotics into your eyelids?
Try cid' and sell rehashes to hipsters like I did?
My brain's dead weight, I'm trying to get my catheter straight, but I can't remember what flavor of Ensure I just ate

And /g/ said "Jobs, you almost dead."
Uh-uh! "Man, the Ipad can multitask better
than the brains you still got left in your head."

Well, since age 50 I've felt myself decline, so I gave them a tablet without flash for $399

Got pissed off and locked the Iphone OS off and raged so hard I almost choked on my cinnamon applesauce

I drink a fat glass of exlax and wait for my nurse to come pull the shit out of my ass

C'mere slut (Steve wait, that's a hat rack)
I don't give a fuck, if she can move I'll have a heart attack