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Jan 23rd, 2018
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  1. A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair., My friend recently got crushed by a pile of books. but he’s only got his shelf to blame., What’s the best part about living in Switzerland? Not sure. but the flag is a big plus.,
  2. Two fish are in a tank. One turns to the other and asks “How do you drive this thing?”, Why can’t a bike stand on its own? It’s two tired.,I wrote a song about a tortilla. Well actually it’s more of a wrap.,Learn sign language. it’s very handy., I started a band called 999 Megabytes — we haven’t gotten a gig yet., My doctor told me today that I have the body of a 25 year old. Not sure how he discovered my secret so I decided to kill him and bury them both together., Just had the following conversation with my boss. Me: 'Sorry I’m not coming in today. Got chickenpox.’ Boss: 'Don’t give me that!' Me: 'I won’t. I’m not coming in., A recent study has found that women who carry a bit of extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.,
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