Micheal Opehus was throwing ayet another stupid imperial guarsd man by the throsat when the glimmer of a thousand gaybens caught his eye. He lookd overd and wsa that the gaping dick of episdoe ninethougsand was on the ohorizen. He popped a massive wingpobybonger and flew towards it sstiffley .


Once he got there and wiped his shoes ta the door mat, a rock feell from heaven and killed him on the spot.


Two hundred years later , Opehys’ great great great great great grand dauson was doing balck flips obn the moon liek a boos whan the evil tynaranids came and said “NO FUCK YOUR BLACK FLIPS” and killed him but not really with a bite on the daick.


He woke up back on the planet gnap gnap rawrg where his great great great grweat great fgrand fucker was had died. He wa s sad but not really about this immutable fact before he got up and dusted off his power armour from fallout becauae he was a good and cool space mariesn so he got the cool armour from the fallout 3 box vocxverjen ...cover.


Seing nothin g was wrong, he frolicked through rthe dead pants that were still thrrwe from Micheal Opehus killin gall rthe stupod grauds man. Some blood god t on his cyber bolocks cannon and he explodad but rnot really and swpooshed back to the futrue in euqaentrai VI which was like ten thousand years later where noon was really midnight because the stars got vbored of gtha t old bullshit and shcaneged their shit to do it so youessah.


He was all like
“Oh no what the fuck?”


But then the last tryinaid came and ate him but punctured his cyber blaster bollovkcs swords and caused a rip in the velvety fabric of time before running over and fuckig it with its massive insect black dick because he was a horney last tyranicd and had not had any bitches to fuck since like long ago.


John was all like
“You fucker are arfucking fucking time!” And stabbed the last tyranid alive with his boot.


The tyradnid had climaxed anyway and had spily t his gross load oall over time and space  so John was jsucksed in bedcause fuck yo uI need theis to co somewhar.


John appearde in Equestria with his powerarmour and ninja flame swords that were better than the emporores because he was his son adn yeah. SUDDENLY A BIG MANTICORE ADN LIKE THREE THYDRAS CAME OUT OF NOTWARE AND fucked his shit up bexcause a ursa major said to do it so he got made at the major because it waas the last booss.


John woke up in Twilight’s house with his dick in her mouth because wshe wasnted him to feel better because he was having hnightmare and she did not like tnightmares and so yes. HE cuam ed in her mouth and she licked it all up because she liked it before turning around and teleporting to the backthromm after calling hgim.


He was like
“Okay.”
And ran afgrter her but covered his ballwas with his hands baecause his awesome gay fallut armour whas has been gone for ever and his swords broke in tmouth of manticore becfause it tasted like purple.