Once upon a time there was a wizard named smape who was snape's twin brother. Zeverous Smape. He was snape's twin brother who was mysteriously absent from the books. Also they misspelled his last name on the birth certificate. And he was in LOVE with somebody named Pilly. He was actually in love with petunia but he got her mixed up with lilly so he called her pilly. Petunia however, did not return his affections. Instead she spat on him. So smape used a charm called engorging charm/sexpelliarmustard/avada fall in love with me. And she got naked and lunged at him. However, she put her clothes back on in midair because she suddenly developed a love for fat men. "oh dear!" cried smape. "I had better go and gain weight somehow". so he visited molly weasley who is sort of a girl. Molly fed him Mario golf. BUT SHE REALIZED HER LOVE FOR MARIO GOLF AND DOVE INSIDE SMAPE TO SAVE IT. Now smape has a woman (kinda) inside him. Sufficiently fattneed, he knew what to do. He ran back to pilly who took her clothes off and lunged at his widened form. But then smape exploded and molly was freed. And that's why smape wasn't in the books THE END OR IS IT???. Pilly was distraught! "Smape, why is there sort of a woman inside you? AND MARIO GOLF!?!?" Smape, who was dead, could not explain so he didn't. THE END FOR REAL THIS TIME.