Work Place Horror

I’m a communications specialist for a local business. I’ll admit I’m an anime and a yaoi fan but I’m not a crazy fangirl.  I used to be a weeaboo when I was younger, but thank God, I’ve mellowed into the normal range. Within a week of my hire date I met a young man, I’ll call him D.

 

D was a hambeast and a weeaboo of the worst kind. I never saw him cleaned up. I swear you could have rung grease from his hair and he hardly ever shaved. He was a major fanboy for DBZ and Helsing. When one of our mutual friends let it slip that I loved anime, too, it was horrible. He was always right there when I turned around talking non-stop about DBZ complete with horrible, loud, sound effects and their accompanying hand motions.

 

D would walk around corners spouting bad Japanese and ask me to finish lines from anime in Japanese. When I told him that not only did I not know how to say the lines in Japanese, but wouldn’t say them even if I did, he got upset and tried to get me to repeat after him. I finally, after the threat of violence, got it through to him that we are not in Japan and we speak English here.

 

The worst part of it all is that D has the hots for me. He would constantly make sexual comments, some times coming around the corner singing “You just made me jizz in my pants” as he made his way to my desk, in a public hallway. He would ask me out several times a week. I always explained that I wasn’t interested and wouldn’t want to ruin our friendship. Each time he would beg me to tell him why.

 

I was getting pretty put out with him by now. His constant DBZ talk was getting on my nerves and I sure didn’t want to date him. I figured that like most of my male friends, he might be put off by the fact that I enjoy yaoi. I brought it up one day in the middle of one of his DBZ talks. Yeah, it didn’t work quite like I thought it would. He just smiled and said he’d watched a little due to one of his old girlfriends.  He said he didn’t really care for it but he’d put up with because he liked yuri.

 

D then began asking me what yuri I’d seen. Oh Lord. I explained to him that yes, I’ve seen a few. Some were good, some weren’t, but I just don’t care for yuri that much. Now please, no one start spouting about typical yaoi fans dissing yuri, like D did.  I’m not dissing it. I just personally don’t care for it. I have no problems with lesbians. I have several lesbian friends. Of course D, the huge perv that he is, asked could we all have a sleep over because he wouldn’t mind watching my friends together, even more so because they’re a threesome. Ugh…A little respect for them would be nice. They are not together for anyone other than themselves to get their rocks off. That was one long conversation I won’t even go into.

 

D would put anime and manga before all else. He was evicted from two apartment buildings because he used his rent money for stuff at our local anime/manga/comic shop. He bounced checks for his utilities and couldn’t even get a car because he was always buying new stuff.

 

D would always come to my desk and moan because it was 95+ degrees outside and he had to walk to work and had to buy a gallon of water just to rinse off because they shut off his power and water. I’ve told him so many times to budget his pay and make sure he pays his bills before he even looks at manga and anime but he just wouldn’t listen.

 

After turning him down for a date so many times he finally demanded I tell him why I wouldn’t go out with him, in detail. I feel kind of bad because he keeps going down the list (yes, he wrote it down) checking off the things as he “fixes” them. He’s cleaned himself up. He actually looks nice now. He’s started paying his bills, going so far as to bring me his receipts so he can prove he’s doing better. He just got his first car and he’s started taking college courses. He is still a weeaboo, even after stopping with his constant DBZ chatter.  He plans to move to Japan and teach English to the Japanese and he wants me to go with him so we can live happily in anime heaven. Lord help me, but I have no intention of dating him, much less moving in with him.