-- explodingLeprechaun [EL] began pestering penultimateBeverage [PB] at 5:29 -- 

EL: WAHOOHOO! 
PB: AHHHH!!!! 
EL: *KABOOM* 
EL: *$PLAT* 
PB: Who be ye?! D:< 
EL: Shamrock, the exploding leprechaun. 
PB: Oh okay 
EL: Yes. 
EL: i have just covered the immediate area in leprechaun guts 
EL: this service has a $800 fee 
PB: Does that include cleaning up? 
EL: no 
PB: Then I'll pass 
EL: OR I COULD CALL OVER MY LEPRECHAUN BUDDIES 
PB: I SIGNED NO CONTRACT! 
EL: YES YOU DID 
EL: IT IS 
EL: OVER THERE 
PB: That's not even my name on it! 
EL: OH YEAH? 
PB: YEAH 
EL: OH YEAH?! 
PB: YEAH!! 
EL: OH YEAH??!! 
PB: This is silly 
EL: OH YEAH???!!! 
EL: wait 
EL: thats the wrong contract 
PB: Told you so 
EL: ok theres the right one over there 
EL: see look right on the bottom it says ginger ale 
EL: wait 
EL: that is a receipt with ginger ale spilt on it 
PB: Yes, it is 
PB: Only contract I've signed is to become the greatest blues artist in the world 
EL: ok i have like eighty pieces of paper here 
EL: and i assure you that one of them is the contract 
EL: ok so pay up 
PB: No way, you've got the wrong person 
PB: I'm not paying for YOUR mistakes! 
EL: OH, LEPRECHAUN BUDDIES 
PB: LET THEM COME! D:< 
EL: *SUDDENLY, EXPLODING LEPRECHAUNS. THOUSANDS OF THEM.* 
EL: ... 
EL: ATTAAAAAAACK 
PB: Wait! 
PB: I have Whiskey! 
EL: ... 
EL: whiskey 
PB: And I'm not afraid to use it! 
EL: ..... 
EL: WE SHALL ATTACK DESPITE THIS 
EL: THE BATTLE IS OURS 
EL: CHARGE, MEN. CHARGE FOR ALL YOUR WORTH. 
PB: I SHALL DRINK THE WHISKEY IN THE FRONT OF YOU 
PB: ALL OF IT 
EL: NOT ALL OF YOU SHALL SURVIVE, BUT THIS WILL BE A PROUD VICTORY FOR LEPRECHAUNS. 
EL: SO CHARGE, FOR THE HOMELAND. 
EL: AND EXPLODE. 
PB: BOOM! 
PB: Hmm wait 
PB: I forgot I need to finish writing this pm 
PB: Be right back 
EL: ALRIGHT 
PB: It'll take a while since it's two pm's. We ended up writing so long messages they wouldn't fit into one and they've only been growing.. <.< 
EL: jegus just how WRITING do you even have to BE just to DO something like that 
PB: I just happened :( 
EL: you did? 
PB: *It 
EL: i did not think that people could be events 
PB: I am the GRANDEST EVENT of all! It's me! 
EL: no I am! 
EL: i'm a god damn exploding leprechaun! 
PB: And I'm the goddamn BATMAN! 
PB: No wait, that was Bruce 
EL: Bruce Banner..... 
EL: *DRAMATIC ZOOM IN* 
PB: Yes 
EL: OR BRUCE WAYNE? 
PB: This question is true 
EL: ok 
EL: well 
EL: oh god 
EL: my leprechaun friends 
EL: whyyyyyy 
PB: Only one you have to blame is yourself! 
PB: You didn't even provide them above average dental! 
EL: oh god 
EL: im so sorry, fallen leprechauns 
EL: what have i done 
PB: You could collect their teeth and sell them to the toothfairy to raise a fund in their memory 
EL: *falls to knees and raises hands, yelling. the camera cuts to a bird's eye view and zooms out towards the sky while it's raining, it is tragic* 
EL: ok i will do that 
EL: problem solved 


-- aFourtytwo [AF] began pestering penultimateBeverage [PB] at 5:47 -- 

AF: YOU HAVE DEFEATED MY LEPRECHAUNS? IMPOSSIBLE! 
AF: WE MUST KUNG FU FIGHT! 
PB: WITH BANJOS 
AF: okay 
AF: banjo battle 
PB: *starts riffing some bluegrass chords in the spirit of Van Halen* 
AF: *DRAGONFORCE AND FREE BIRD EXCEPT WITH BANJOS* 
PB: CURSES! *Mark Knopfler and Jeff Freaking Beck with BANJOS* 
AF: *JIMI HINDRIX* 
AF: *YNGWEI MALMSTEEN* 
PB: *CHUCK BERRY AND BUDDY HOLLY* 
AF: *IMAGINATION MOVERS* 
PB: *DUCK WALK* 
AF: *DANCE-A-LOT ROBOT DINOSAUR DANCE* 
PB: I'm sorry, I don't think I can top robot dinosaurs. They're my one weakness! D: 
AF: *ROBOT DINOSAUR SONG* 
AF: *ROBOT DINOSAUR ANTHEM* 
PB: No wait! I can counter it.. with the power of ELTON JOHN! *CROCODILE ROCK!!!* 
AF: *SALAMANDER ROCK* 
AF: *TURTLE ROCK* 
PB: Okay, that's enough. I need to get back to writing this crazy thing 
AF: I am the victor! 
PB: It's you :( 
AF: Now, please pay the leprechaun explosion fees. 
PB: No 
AF: yesss 
PB: Oh fine fine <.< 
PB: Here's $800 of monopoly money. It's all I have. 
AF: yaaaaay 
PB: Now go and buy those blue ones 
AF: oh god i just spent it all on toys from disney world 
AF: OH WELL 
PB: D: