How to become a C GOD

C is the bwst programming language ever. It is such a good programming language because it has statememts like the go-to goto statement thid this is what makes it so fun to use! I like t o programin in c and use the go to goto stamtennt when writing my col cool programings ok ? First of all C is was was awesome ok. C is fun to write programs with because first of all C is the most important programming language in the world! Every computer ises uses C because guess what C can do what nothing else can that is what makes it so special. First of all programming languages, some programming langauges that are not C are stupid because firsr of all the yare not C ok. EXcept for FORTRAN which is not a bad programmers language either? So why is C the greatest programming language every made? First of all C is not just a programming language it is THE Porgmgraimming language that only reela programmingers use ok. Only real programmiers us e  C becauese it is so awyesome. Secpmd pf a;; all C has the best syntax of any programming language v ever MADE ever because q j guess what every other pgroaminng language after C ( All of them) copied its siyntax because the ppl who people who wrote the GENIUSES that wrote C were so awesome and cool that they git got it ewrite the first time! and that is whzt ywh why ae everyone bcopied them . Because htey have no talents like fucking have no idea who how to make a programmering langauge because they arent smart like the person who write C! C has such a fun syntax to write C in lik e I like how it has { } brackets which makes the SCOPE byut we will talk about that later ok. So First of all C has amazing programming language features like MALLOC, like GOTO, like __ASM__, like POINTRES which are the funnets thing to do every in a programming langue pointers are the coolest thing taht was ever invented ok so first of all when pointers programming was diffrent pefor before they have pointers because it used to be that you didnt have them and you had to write your programs on TAPE! but then the coolest programming programmer in the Universe um BRIAN KERNEIGRAN and DENNIS RITCHIE invented the BEST programming language ever C !  now programming is in two parts ok so firsdt it was "BEFORE POINTERS" (which means before C because they didnt hsve that before see ok  got it ) So then AFTER C wjich was a computers rennosance in the world and the grass turned getreen which it wasnt before they had C byt then we could make the grass green after it was invented by the C got ther C GOD+S BRIAN KERN AND DENNY RITCH. Ok So why are pointers so g cool? to a HERETIC who does not progamming in C then it seems like a mystery but it will not after you finish reading my book.  OK so not olny does C have pointers and MALLOC hwich i  like I love writing malloc() when I write my code that is so much fun to use and it is suo s useful ! and peopel who wd ont understand first of all think of it like a TURING MACHINE whoch was invented by this person called alan turing who in the 50s killed himself for being gay but before that he invented turinning machines which was like a n peice of tape except it was actually a comptuer!@ ? and then when C invented MALLOC you could own parts of the tape so fred form school wouldnt bullt y you w and write all over YOUR TAPE! which is what happened before C was invented and then when I was I typed MALLoc into the cmputer and I was like WOW! that was so cool ? how about that . SO not only does it have that but it has GO-TO which is so much fun because its how your computer does anything on time? when you use go to you  your comptuer goes fadster because it is OGING TO the write answr. that you asked it fori. but stupid epople dont know how t use these htings which it why wi is why FUCKINg shitty programming lnaguages copied C!?!?! but they didnt copy the good park wehcih was using malloc and got os which is w so much fun and first ofal alo fus first of all if you use a SHITTY GAY programming lnaguage like java ? you shouldnt you should kill yourself ok first of all otehr pgroamming langueges like java-script are stupid and poopy and gay and first of all g java is gay and stupid and it was invented by this stupid giy who CPIED C? but C was copyrighted which is whay nobody programms in java except for te retarded people ok because first of all java does not have it wa does not even have GOTOs like who invented this shitty TRASH you cant even do anything and it does not even have memory management and why like why wouldn t you let people callc MALIC wow like golly gosh , like wow why would anyone use this peice of shit like when ever I write code in java script it feels like I am drinking bleach which is not fun at al. OK So whtne do t so then wh what about C +++ ? first of all C ++ is a giant RIP FO osf C it ieven uses the same CODE that C was made it whicih is not allowefd because C is copy-rgihgied? whenever you see the symbol (c) on something that means it was writtne in C which means that you cannot steal otehr people s works. even my refrigerateor as a (c) on it which is good because refrigerators keep our food cold. I would not buy something that is not made with a (C) by a C GOD . ok at thand and that brings us to the main pont of this documentatry text which is to teach YOU how ot become a a C GOD like me ok; so why if you thin kthat it is OK to write in writing TRASH like PYTHON, like JAVA SCRIPT, first of all those langauges do not even have types so they hold your hand like a little baby which aveveybody who writes in languages that do no have types is a stupd likee stupid dumb likttle babty ok first of all PYTHON is writting in C ! second onf lall if you think that any other lanauge instead of C then wh you should s kill yourself. Ok so if you are serious about programming like REAL programming and not writing in those stupid languages like rooby which is just a MEME anway. now why what some of you might be thinking is that how do I write in C ? Because my empty likfe has no meaning and I need an obsessing to fill the voicd of mediocrity that defines my C-Less life. Please tell us about POINTERS! tells us about using GO TO ! And you are very lucky beacyuse if you PLEBIANS read this far then you might be able to be save d by atonement for your herisess and sin. Yor meaningless life of blind hedonisims without a turing machime, without a MALLOC call, just in your shitty gay meme garden watering your memwes. But there is an wanser.! you mist become a C programmerr like ME! See aeveryone who writes in stupid bad languages that arentot C is just a gay baby who would no tk now how to use memset() they would just use a FOR loop instead because stupid ababy languages would make them use these stupid things yo dont NEED for loops all the time. Ok so. Whneever I see someonebod y useing an inferior HERETIC lnagugage like i dont know RUST? I just look at it adn I  Think to myself "WOW. JUST WOW. GOLLY GEE." like wow like Who does that. WHO DOES THAT. ? ? First of tall I be tt these things have what is all called OOP like "OOP" for OOPS! I FUCKED UP! IM GOING TO KILL MYSELF! but its not for that even though it should be people waouill tell you that it stanrds for Object Oriented Porgamming. What a stupid MEME . Like wow, First of all anyone whodoes this should be euthanized so that they cannot pollute our society any more.  Like gee whiz...  Golly wow .!!! if you dont understand wh ypeopole who do not udnesntand , who do not see the LIGHT SHINKING DOWN ON THEIR HEADS , shoud be rounded up and DESTROYED you are part of the problme. OK so now that you understand why C is the bst langauges every because of my masterful complelling arugments whtaht what were thought up my a by a GENIUS, by a C GOD, you nodw understand whtat kinds of MASS ive intellectual feats of wint A C GOD is capable of. In face t you are readying tsomthing that was thought up by a C GOD> .!! So now you understand just what kind of efect that wiring programsin C has on the human brain. How in on the science channel you will migth headr htat hthe human only uses 10 percent of their brains? But in a C programmer they use two HUNDERED precent of their brains because C just makes everyosmething so optimized with GO TO staments . now some people are just walking TRASH with no optineitonal to lean C and to become a C GOD but if you arw radin g this far into my novel, intom my REVELATION, you understnad, you have the will poer and inteelgencet capatcity to leanrn C/.  You might not ereailzied it buyt your head is abosrbing my brain waves which I am progjecting into this work of ART, this tome that will be passed down for generations, ofor great posteriror y . C is our fabric of excistence. The universe was written IN C . Because any dicible is capabled of abosrbing my brain waves, they wiull become a C god after reading this ein its enteriety.!1