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I) Basic Life values. 1. No addiction to drinking, drugs, smoking, cutting, or other self destructive behavior 2. Atheist, Agnostic, or other secular identity 3. Ideally, vegetarian, or at least doesn't eat meat very often 4. No "dangerous fun" that involves serious risk of injury or illegal activities 5. Appreciates life planning, living frugally, saving the for the future, ect 6. Democrat if American, or would vote Democrat if from somewhere else 7. Healthy sense of self esteem - not arrogant or self-loathing II) Lifestyle. Interests and Intellectual Abilities 1. More of an introvert than an extrovert 2. Enjoys reading 3. At least somewhat similar taste in food, movies, and music 4. Likes cooking or would like to learn 5. Is creative in some way 6. Prefers reason and evidence based thinking to concepts like superstition, luck, and spirituality 7. An intellectual in the classic sense of the word 8. Enjoys some video or computer games 9. Doesn't allow others (family, friends, ect) to control them 10. Some similar intellectual interests, such as: history, chess, politics, science, psychology, sociology 11. More of a night owl than an early bird 12. Does not want a dog or horse as a pet. Cats are great 13. Does not describe herself with the phrase "Just want to have fun" or "love to go with the flow no matter what" 14. She does not care about traditions, and she doesn't (within reason) care what other people think about her, or me III) Concerning the relationship 1. Believes in monogamy, commitment, and fidelity 2. Wants to learn and grow as a person continuously. 3. Believes honesty is always the best policy, even at the expense of courtesy 4. Good communication with me, and loves having long conversations 5. Is my lover and my best friend 6. Romantic, and unafraid to show it. Goes out of her way to do thoughtful and kind things 7. Is nice and respectful to my family 8. Prioritizes the relationship in the same way that I do. She has a certain "us against the world" attitude. 9. Prefers not to "fight" when we have a disagreement. Does not get violent or hurl insults when angry 10. Does not use manipulation, guilt, or other "tricks" to "win" disagreements 11. Always keeps promises 12. Similar sense of humor 13. Feels and expresses love in a warm, passionate way 14. Would comfort me if I was crying, instead of laugh 15. Willing to honestly admit mistakes IV) Concerning the roles in the relationship romantically 1. Comfortable "taking the lead in the dance of love," in the literal and symbolic sense 2. Sees the fact that I am gentle, sensitive, and emotional as good thing 3. Prefers erotic literature to porn 4. Thinks I am attractive physically 5. Is attractive physically to me 6. Loves cuddling, in sexual and non sexual situations 7. Enjoys bathing together 8. Loves kissing and is a good kisser 9. Likes the fact that I have a high sex drive 10. Comfortable holding hands and kissing in public on occasion
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