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- 07:15 p.m. - ♣: I just found out that all monotheist religions are in fact the same
- 07:15 p.m. - ♣: And that the bibles has two jesuses
- HiHeiwa¼ is now Online.
- 07:16 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: Really?
- 07:16 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: Cool.
- 07:16 p.m. - ♣: yeah
- 07:16 p.m. - ♣: You see
- 07:16 p.m. - ♣: Once upon a time there were the Egyptians
- 07:16 p.m. - ♣: They liked the sun
- 07:16 p.m. - ♣: So they worshipped the sun and called it Horus
- 07:17 p.m. - ♣: in Egyptian mythology, Horus was born of a virgin on december 25th and was followed by three kings.
- 07:18 p.m. - ♣: He was a teacher at the age of 12 and was baptized at the age of 30
- 07:18 p.m. - ♣: Furthermore he was crucified and three days later resurrected
- 07:18 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: Haha what
- 07:18 p.m. - ♣: And there's a lot of religions that go this way
- 07:18 p.m. - ♣: But the best part is
- 07:19 p.m. - ♣: It happened twice in the bible
- 07:19 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: Win
- 07:19 p.m. - ♣: You see
- 07:20 p.m. - ♣: Jesus and the jesus before him, named Joseph, were personifications of the sun
- 07:20 p.m. - ♣: A mistranslation of God's sun.
- 07:20 p.m. - ♣: Which became God's son
- 07:21 p.m. - ♣: Actually I should just link you to the videos
- 07:22 p.m. - ♣: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3k49dDCSFnk&feature=related
- 07:22 p.m. - ♣: Conclusion?
- 07:22 p.m. - ♣: Religion is the best thing ever
- 07:22 p.m. - ♣: If you know the story behind it all
- 07:23 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: Hehe
- 07:24 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: Well
- 07:24 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: There was one thing I was taught in my old school
- 07:24 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: When Jesus died on the cross
- 07:25 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: He made it so that he got a "black mark" instead of us when we sinned
- 07:25 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: Which basically means he gets the punishment
- 07:25 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: So surely, no-one goes to Hell
- 07:25 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: except Jesus
- 07:25 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: And because we were taught that, according to the Holy Trinity
- 07:25 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: God = Jesus
- 07:25 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: The only person in Hell
- 07:25 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: is God
- 07:26 p.m. - ♣: Actually
- 07:26 p.m. - ♣: Everyone worships satan
- 07:26 p.m. - ♣: You see
- 07:26 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: Coo'
- 07:27 p.m. - ♣: The entire story of the sun god is about Horus and Set, who do battle every twelve hours
- 07:27 p.m. - ♣: so in this case, Jesus vs. Satan all day erry day
- 07:27 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: Sweet
- 07:27 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: God vs Satan every twelve hours
- 07:27 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: How do people keep missing it?
- 07:28 p.m. - ♣: Well
- 07:28 p.m. - ♣: Religion
- 07:28 p.m. - ♣: is just a word for belief
- 07:28 p.m. - ♣: The roots however
- 07:28 p.m. - ♣: Lie in astronomy
- 07:28 p.m. - ♣: All of it
- 07:28 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: True dat
- 07:28 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: Well, in everything generally
- 07:28 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: "There's lightning out there"
- 07:28 p.m. - ♣: Actually the best bit is
- 07:29 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: "MUST BE SOME GIANT HUMAN IN THE SKY WIT A BEARD"
- 07:29 p.m. - ♣: There's been multiple messiahs
- 07:29 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: "Dude your wife cheated on you again"
- 07:29 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: "GOD'S WIIIIIIIIIIIILL!"
- 07:29 p.m. - ♣: There was the bull dude who we know nothing of
- 07:29 p.m. - ♣: And then there was Moses, who was the deity of I think Aeris
- 07:30 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: Well, he wasn't a Messiah
- 07:30 p.m. - ♣: He was
- 07:30 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: He was a prophet
- 07:30 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: To christians that is
- 07:30 p.m. - ♣: Kayfine
- 07:30 p.m. - ♣: Prophet
- 07:30 p.m. - ♣: Anyway
- 07:30 p.m. - ♣: Best part
- 07:30 p.m. - ♣: when he ascended the mountain with the tablet with the ten commandments
- 07:30 p.m. - ♣: Best thing
- 07:30 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: >Eat a weird mushroom
- 07:30 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: >Think a burning bush is talking to you
- 07:30 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: >???
- 07:30 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: >Prophet!
- 07:31 p.m. - ♣: New age happened
- 07:31 p.m. - ♣: When Moses came down
- 07:31 p.m. - ♣: People were still worshipping the bull in what religious nuts think is a fake religion
- 07:31 p.m. - ♣: it wasn't.
- 07:31 p.m. - ♣: Honk.
- 07:31 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: Durrhurr
- 07:31 p.m. - ♣: Y'see
- 07:32 p.m. - ♣: The sun passes a constellation every 2150 years
- 07:33 p.m. - ♣: That day, the sun had passed the tauros and reached aeris
- 07:33 p.m. - ♣: so they had to reinvent religion
- 07:33 p.m. - ♣: So Moses gets pissed and he's like "Kill yourself in the name of the sun"
- 07:33 p.m. - ♣: Everybody died.
- 07:33 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: :V
- 07:34 p.m. - ♣: Oh yeah,
- 07:34 p.m. - ♣: Jesus is two fish
- 07:34 p.m. - ♣: He is the prophet of pisces
- 07:34 p.m. - ♣: And the bible hints to this a lot.
- 07:34 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: Religion sure is complicated
- 07:34 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: And silly
- 07:34 p.m. - ♣: Hence the jesus fish
- 07:34 p.m. - ♣: Now here comes the best part.
- 07:35 p.m. - ♣: In approximately 149 years
- 07:35 p.m. - ♣: There will be a new prophet
- 07:35 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: Welp.
- 07:35 p.m. - ♣: Jesus announced that he will be an aquarius.
- 07:35 p.m. - ♣: Honk.
- 07:36 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: Eridan: The Prophet?
- 07:36 p.m. - ♣: Also the apocalypse? Bullshit.
- 07:36 p.m. - ♣: It was a mistranslation
- 07:36 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: "Wwe all need to wworship the hipster god"
- 07:36 p.m. - ♣: instead of world, it was supposed to say 'Aeon'
- 07:36 p.m. - ♣: which means age
- 07:36 p.m. - ♣: so basically
- 07:36 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: End of an age
- 07:36 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: :T
- 07:36 p.m. - ♣: Yes.
- 07:36 p.m. - ♣: The age of pisces
- 07:37 p.m. - ♣: So this means
- 07:38 p.m. - ♣: That Homestuck is dumb and completely incorrect
- 07:38 p.m. - ♣: 0/10 andsoforth
- 07:39 p.m. - ♣: except when you start thinking
- 07:39 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: Wait what's it incorrect about?
- 07:39 p.m. - ♣: Y'see
- 07:39 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: I dun geddit
- 07:39 p.m. - ♣: I stop thinking when I explain things
- 07:40 p.m. - ♣: I jsut gave it some thought and was like 'OH FUCK I JUST REALIZED'
- 07:40 p.m. - ♣: so here goes
- 07:40 p.m. - ♣: OH FUCK I JUST REALIZED
- 07:40 p.m. - ♣: FEFERI IS IN FACT LIKE JESUS
- 07:40 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: True dat
- 07:40 p.m. - ♣: How 'bout this
- 07:40 p.m. - ♣: She hangs out with gods
- 07:40 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: Bringing about peace and shiz
- 07:40 p.m. - ♣: And wants people to accept them
- 07:40 p.m. - ♣: instead, she dies.
- 07:40 p.m. - HiHeiwa¼: Died
- 07:40 p.m. - ♣: The end.
- 07:41 p.m. - ♣: So basically
- 07:41 p.m. - ♣: Historical in-joke
- 07:41 p.m. - ♣: Eridan is
- 07:41 p.m. - ♣ sunglasses
- 07:41 p.m. - ♣: New age
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