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- That house seemed to be a constant in my life.
- I planned a small party, a few friends with one goal.
- Get high for the first time and don't let family find out.
- The needed items gathered and friends arrived.
- The fun was in full swing, for now.
- As I lifted my head and exhaled the large cloud I saw headlights.
- My aunt and uncle, why were THEY here? Why now?
- I scrambled the troops to hide the evidence of the wild night.
- A cornucopia of glass and flowers shoved in a plastic bag in the closet.
- A friend's Parakeet hidden away in the pantry.
- Family flooded the house as 5 teens tried to play cool.
- Squawks erupted from the pantry and we knew we were found out.
- As if a small bird could uncover our plans.
- Not thinking of the light fog in the air, the smell, and the panicked reactions of us 5.
- Nothing came out of it.
- No one was harmed or in trouble.
- Only one stayed behind to help clean.
- I didn't know her and she didn't know me.
- How did she get here?
- Those questions melted away as we cleaned.
- A natural friendship blossoming in the midst of a teenage disaster.
- Something about her grabbed my soul and never let go.
- "My name is ...... by the way."
- My mind still locks the memories away.
- Days passed and I saw more and more of her and we grew closer and closer.
- The hold she had on my soul grew tighter and tighter until sometimes I swear it hurt.
- It was 5 months later that she kissed me under the porch light as I stumbled for words.
- She ran home embarassed and time stood still.
- All my problems faded.
- We joked about it the next day and told eachother how we felt.
- Soon our love began to grow like a spark in a dry California forest.
- I had found the one and nothing could go wrong.
- Two years went by and our connection had grown so strong.
- We would make the joke that we often finished eachother's...
- "Sandwiches!", she jested. It never got old to me.
- Then, as if waiting in silence since we met, roaring out of the shadows it happened.
- A horrific deed done in the name of fate that tore us apart.
- Even now my mind won't let me remember the cataclysm.
- Only the fight that followed.
- She cried.
- I stood in awe of how quickly perfection can be ripped from you.
- I can't remember how long it was between the waves that it sent through our lives.
- Her dad kicked her out.
- I offered for her to stay with me but it was if I had done something wrong.
- I don't know.
- I felt an anger brewing inside her as the words crossed her lips.
- "This would have never happened if I hadn't met you."
- "I hate you."
- Every joint in my body locked and I was thrown out of time.
- The pain of lost love was unfathomable.
- It hurt.
- I cried.
- She was gone from my life and there was nothing I could do.
- So, I went on living still with the shards of a shattered past in my mind.
- I tried to extract the memories by burning everything that reminded me of her.
- I had nothing left.
- I don't know how long had passed.
- Possibly forever.
- I lost track of the days as I stumbled through life a empty shell among the fallout.
- Everywhere I went I saw her.
- She was never really there.
- Life was an endless march in solitude.
- One morning as I awoke I was not filled with the same dread as usual.
- There was a small feeling inside of me that something good was to happen.
- I had not felt this way in years so I protected this light so it wouldn't fade.
- It was my only warmth in a cold lonely world.
- As I walked into that place again I was haunted by her face in the crowd.
- She sat with a friend never noticing me in the distance.
- Was this really her or was what I felt earlier the spark of insanity that threw me overboard?
- This phantom didn't fade.
- I stood staring as the memories slowly returned.
- I don't know how long I was there.
- Suddenly my trance was broken by her friend pointing me out.
- I had seen this all before, I stare, get pointed out, I get disgusted looks.
- Not this time.
- As the figure turned to face me I realized that this was no apparition.
- Her eyes locked with mine.
- Disbelief from both sides.
- Slowly she stood.
- Never losing eye contact she slowly made her way to me.
- As she met me in the middle of this crowded room she gently touched my cheek.
- Her hand made a connection and every memory that I tried for years to erase flooded back.
- I relived the past in an instant as I felt my heart strain.
- Only one feeling remained, that love like two armies hellbent on annihilation.
- As the tears rushed down my cheeks I said to her,
- "I.......waited....."
- She wrapped me in a full embrace and through her crys I heard a soft voice,
- "I still love you"
- As the last word passed her lips and entered my mind,
- I woke up.
- I had lost her again.
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