pascal kammer

Pascal Kammer

Ryou Takeshi

 

Real Name        Pascal Kammer

Birthday         March 04, 19 years old

Address  Germany, Am Burgplatz 2, Püttlingen, 66346

Email    kammerp@web.de

Job      Proud NEET

Mobile   +(49)017639367136

Voicemail        "add me right away, sir, you will not regret it."

I'm a pretty weird and random person, but I occasionally enjoy any sort of smalltalk, so if you're feeling lucky or might be thinking "Who's that incredibly handsome fellow over there?", add me right away, sir, you will not regret it.

Ever see a guy at work or school who sends off creepy vibes, and you say to yourself "man, I know that guy rapes children"? This is that guy.

 

When he's not jerking off to anime, furry or child porn, showing his dick off on webcam or just being an internet celebrity, he likes to write how shit his life is and how unmotivated he is to change it and generally just about being a loser.

 

He also likes to hit on young girls and trannies and to make tweets every 10 seconds about animu, little kids or his shitty life and he is extremely desperate, desperate enough to beg people to add him back even if they don't like him. And watch out, to this guy, the internet is serious business.

 

Did I mention he also browses 9gag?

 

Contents [hide]

1 Profiles

2 Famous Quotes

2.1 Twitter

2.2 This is me. My name is Pascal Kammer.

2.3 Nothing out of the norm

2.4 Time to get a life again

2.5 It doesn’t matter how fast you’re going if you’re running against a wall.

2.6 Welcome to my new blog!

[edit] Profiles

Twitter: https://twitter.com/#!/TakeshiRyou

 

Online GF: https://twitter.com/#!/TakeshiRirisar

 

Tumblr: http://takatakatakeshi.tumblr.com/

 

His site: http://ryounia.com/wordpress/

 

Steam: http://steamcommunity.com/profiles/76561198000458245

 

[edit] Famous Quotes

[edit]Twitter

Whenever I say "I'm going to bed." there's at least one person somewhere that makes a sexual joke about sleeping with me.

Why do people never want to touch me when I ask them to?

I wish my girlfriend was online. Been meaning to talk to her for the past 4 hours.

@Mezzuchi How much for your body?

Some pictures are too cute to fap to.

I'm so going to tweet about it if I had sex with my girlfriend.

correction: cyber with e-girlfriend

 

@CoronaRadiata0 I've seen enough Hentai to know where this is going

Being horny at work still isn't a good idea.

I'm not fucked up in the head, I'm special.

I want to make sexual jokes to strangers but they might think I'm fucked up in the head

If only I was a girl, too, then maybe people would love me as much as @Stalkae.

Some people should learn to stay out of other people's business. Like, for real.

3 hour calls with my girlfriend because I can.

Wouldn't surprise me if I'm single again, soon.

Me: "Time to get sexy?" My Girlfriend: "Hell yes."

Since you people are apparently way too shy to admit how fucking amazing I am, I'll just drop the livestream link here.

I'm going to slap everyone's ass if I ever hear someone say "Maybe get a job?" after I tell them I haven't gotten a job in 2 years again.

I didn't think some friends of mine would actually come in this handy when it boils down to meeting someone from the internet.

So, my girlfriend plays games, watches Doctor Who, knows memes, watches anime, is perverted and looks absolutely adorable. That's cool.

I guess I have a girlfriend now.

Should I like the fact that a girl likes the fact that I have tasted my own sperm?

Whenever I try to pickup a girl it never seems to work. "Do you want to be my waifu?" seems to be outdated.

Do you hear this, internet police? I am not really asking boys on the internet for their penis size, it is only for comedic relief!

My dentist is really fucking hot. She's a geeky redhead woman in her thirties, and boy do I want to have her.

[edit]This is me. My name is Pascal Kammer.

I don’t normally like to beg for money, and I don’t usually bring it on Tumblr either, but since this is really desperate and people kept telling me to raise awareness, here I stand. My mother and I have been living in this small apartment for quite a while now, it’s not necessarily big, but it’s alright. So the prize for our apartment is 400€ plus additional money for gas and electricity and the usual stuff you have, my mother makes 300€ herself because she just won’t get any better work at her place. As you can see, this money system doesn’t work out. I’ve been trying to find a job and/or apprenticeship since July 2010 and have still not been able to find anything. The Federal Employment Office of Germany pays us additional money, because we would not be able to manage otherwise. This is normal here.

 

Problem is, it’s not enough. I know we get about 300€ additionally, which may cover the base costs, but by far doesn’t cover all the rest that we pay monthly. This usually worked out pretty well, but ever since I’ve gotten into a program of the FEO, instead of 300€ we only get 200€. This does not suffice. My uncle was usually the amazing guy to sometimes cover a bit of it, but due to some trouble we ran in, and through logic alone, this couldn’t last forever. So right now, basically, we’re on the verge of being thrown out. I’ve talked with my mother, and of course she doesn’t really want to broadcast it, nor does she want to beg others for help, but I’m not idly sitting here, waiting for us to get a new home (if we’re able to afford one, at that.) My beg now is really simple. We need about 100€ additionally, probably monthly by now but that’s a concern for later. Fact is, that right now, we need this money by the end of the month. I’ve opened up donations on my blog, I’ve told people on Twitter (I will link those at the end of the post) and now I’m asking Tumblr. If you have a spare dollar or two, I would greatly appreciate it.

 

Right here are pictures of our current home. It’s not much, but we manage. The cat you see is Sandy. A friend of my mother found her outside, almost dying, but she couldn’t take her of her so we took her. She’s healthy again, as you can see (she’s fat), but we’ll probably also need to give her away. She’d need to get check by the vet, too, but we could never afford that either. This isn’t of the highest priority now, though.

 

My blog is located here. It’s not up to date because life is pretty hectic right now. The donation box is on the right side, or can be found right here.

 

If you want to talk to me directly, I can be contact at any given time through my Twitter @TakeshiRyou or just Steam and Skype which should be linked or mention somewhere. You can also always ask on Tumblr.

[edit]Nothing out of the norm

I don’t even fucking care for an introduction right now.

 

Not much happened today as usual, or rather, since I’m out of the program I have mentioned multiple times on my blog (well, on my last blog at least). Yeah, so, I’m officially unemployed now. Nothing to do with life. Completely without any intent of achieving anything, too. I’m registered for the school I have been talking about, but I’m actually considering not going there. I don’t want to, I hate it, I’d much rather just sit here at home or work. But not school, no, especially not that kind of school. I’ll see what happens until then, though.

 

I’m also stopping with this so called “new style of writing”, not like I had much chance to test it anyway, but certain people (see comments last post) have really stolen me any sort of motivation in what I had in mind, so fuck that.

 

I have a girlfriend now, yeah. Been going on about how I’d “get to that later” last post, but I never got around to, so I’ll just do it here. Her name’s Lisa, she’s 15, and we’ve been going out for almost a month. She has Twitter, too, and in case you follow me you will probably have noticed that I mentioned her a couple of times. She’s also linked in my profile. She mostly tweets in German, though, which is a shame because I’d like her to converse with others, but nobody is going to follow her unless she sticks with English. Speaking about her, I’m also going to meet her. That’s right, I will be visiting Austria at the 6th of June, which is going to take me about 10 hours and also a lot of money, but she’s paying half of it, which is really kind and somewhat needed because I’m a poor piece of shit. She’s great, a little naive here and there, but so am I. And we all know I’m fucking amazing.

 

Not really, no. I’m rather pathetic if you think about it. Most of my troubles are caused by myself in one way or the other. I know I shouldn’t compare myself to others, but when I think about what they achieved in the same amount of time, it’s just sad. Speaking of friends, I learned a lot of facts about some of them. Facts that I’m really not willing to discuss here, although I would love to. But I think the fact that they have willingly shared private information of their lives with me makes it clear that I shouldn’t just give out that information to the next person I happen to walk across.

 

I’ve been playing so much Diablo III, holy shit. The purchase of the game itself was sort of “Oh screw it, what the hell”, because I honestly didn’t believe it would drag me in so hard. I mean, the beta was fun, don’t get me wrong, but the game didn’t seem to be that amazing at first. The story is pretty cool and solid, and makes for quite a fun experience. I’d say you play at least 10 hours with one character. That’s a solid experience, given that it was a lot of fun. But of course that’s not what the game is about. There’s tons of achievements, and aside from that, at least 4 other characters with unique spells and abilities that you have yet to explore and experience. And on top of that, there’s multiple difficulties that make the game more challenging the longer you play it. I’m currently level 56 with my Demon Hunter on Hell difficulty. Level 60 is the max level, and once I reach that it’s time for Inferno difficulty. The fact that normal monsters easily hit half your health per attack on Hell makes it pretty scary when I think about how hard Inferno is going to be. My secondary character is the Monk, currently residing on level 32, Nightmare Difficulty. I’m excited to test out the rest.

 

I was actually hoping to type more, but that’s really all there is to say about my current situation. I’m not really depressed (at least not more than usual), and I’m having fun playing games for the time being. I think it’s all okay as long as I can just live my life without giving much of a fuck. Let’s see how long it takes for life to catch up again. Oh, right. A song. Here you go. This song really helps to let my mind drift away, I find. It’s a song that’s not completely full of action and really relaxed. I like it. A lot.

[edit]Time to get a life again

Sup guys. There’s not actually a whole lot on my mind right now, but it’s been quite a while and I figured while I’m currently waiting for the Guild Wars 2 beta to start and still have some time to kill, I might as well use this chance to write about what the hell happened in my live recently.

 

My depression is sort of over again, I went and submitted my registration to that one school I’m probably going to because so far I still haven’t found any work, so people have been bugging me 24/7 about continuing with school, and while that sounds clever and seem to be a somewhat smart decision, I hate it. You see, I was never a fan of school, not only because I don’t like spending several hours a day whilst not being paid a cent each week, mostly because of the fact that teachers never knew that learning for school was enough and we didn’t need additional piles of homework to do daily. Now, I never did any of my homework, like, ever, but still managed to finish school easily, I could’ve probably had a much better graduation if I gave a fuck about learning, but I never did any of that either. Learning is important, though, I was just being a lazy fuck there. Well, I’ll see how it goes, it’s not like it’ll be completely in school, half of my week will be spent in an actual company that has agreed to take me up as a trainee (of course they did that, I work for free). Generally, I still believe it’s a giant fucking waste of time, but what the hell.

 

The sky is sort of getting dark, pretty sure it’s going to rain soon.

 

Also, I was surprised that nobody commented on my new way of writing, as in, telling a rather bland and unimportant story inside of a much bigger and important story. It was a concept I came up with while writing my last blog post, and I really liked the idea, which eventually led up to the fact that I also decided to implement it in this post as well. Now, I’m not sure if I’ll do this forever, but at least for now it’s sort of a cool thing to do, so I’m guessing I’ll stick with it for some time. Speaking of sticky, I ate some Greek yogurt with almonds and honey yesterday, and it tasted surprisingly good, weird, but good.

 

Still not raining, the sun actually appeared again. Guess I misjudged the weather.

 

There have been many games I played, and a lot more I’m looking forward to, it’s mostly indie games that were recently released on Steam. The problem I have with indie games is that they’re almost always really fucking amazing to play for a cheap price, but if you wait a couple of months they’ll appear for basically free in some indie bundle scattered around the internet. So while I’m actually really anxious to go play them, I have to hold myself back for now and wait for them to appear bundled. One game I did manage to try out, though, was Last Survivor. It’s a game about a person living in some sort of monster-ridden apartment which he’s desperately trying to get out of whilst having nightmares and hallucinations. The game is completely pixelized and works as a sort of side-scrolling horror adventure. The problem these kinds of games still haven’t figured out is that games lose their atmosphere if you are able to defend yourself against these kind of beasts. The game starts out well by giving you nothing but a flashlight and some rotten meat to attract monsters and forces you to sneak past them by paying close attention to the lighting, since they don’t see you in the dark. It has some really scary moments, but once you get the gun, the game loses a lot of difficulty, and I never actually felt myself in need of ammo, since the game happily provides it en masse. I can’t really recommend it, but it’s a neat game that you should definitely look into if you have time.

 

Well the sun disappeared again. I’m not quite sure, but I think the weather is trying to fuck with me.

 

I’m actually a little saddened while I’m writing this. Sure, a lot of cool things have happened recently, as in, I got more close with Sam and his friends while we were playing League, and I’ve also met a really amazing girl which is now my girlfriend (I’ll get to that later), but I just looked up my friends and realized that Shade was missing. Yeah, not sure if I mentioned it, but we had a fight because of her girlfriend and what not, which was actually fixed again, and I was happy to have her back as a friend. But I guess not. I guess she prefers to fuck me over without even telling me so. I’m not sure what I did this time to have her remove me again, since we were just starting to get close again, but it’s not the first time people make a heel-face turn and decide I’m not worth their time anymore. Speaking of which, I should try cleaning my friend list. I don’t like having so many people on it, because it’s hardly a friend list anymore, but then again half of the people are at least somewhat important to me and I feel like deleting them would hurt their feelings, so I just end up faffing about it endlessly while never actually deleting them.

 

The weather remains unchanged so far. I would actually like rain. Rain calms me down.

 

Homestuck has gotten intense lately again. So much shit is going down, it’s incredible. I’m still loving everything about it, and recent events have shown me how much I love the series as a whole again. I have had a lot of time thinking about the characters I have in my head, and how their personalities work. I’ve noticed that Brandon lacked a lot of personality, while the others where completely thought out, so I came up with a somewhat snobby personality. Usually in a good mood, and constantly going on about nobility since his parents are both members of the royal family in Great Britain. There’s also a funny joke I came up with, since there’s actual blue-blooded trolls, and blue-blooded refers to royalty in Human Society. I think overall I’m slowly making process with them. The trolls are a lot harder to fit in, since there’s so many. I’m also considering to rework Vermis’ character design. Right now she looks like a female version of Gamzee, which was sort of he point, but this doesn’t give her the chance to show her own personality. I’m still thinking about it, but for now I’ll leave it as is.

 

And the sun came out again, fuck my life. I’m done commenting on this shit.

 

Suppose that’s it for today. I’ll link another video of something I like down there now, see if you dig it or not. I’m actually quite fond of it, and consider it to be one of the most epic soundtracks there ever was.

[edit]It doesn’t matter how fast you’re going if you’re running against a wall.

I’m back! Well, technically, since I was never really gone in the first place, but even though my current blog posts may not be as frequent as they used to be, I think with this post I’m trying to convince you that I’m trying to update you more regularly .

 

Well, I’ve been steadily heading towards “No Depression Island” when my ship was suddenly hit by a meteorite that fell from the sky and crashed into the ocean. Man, what are the odds for that? Anyway, yeah, I’d like to say I’m depressed, but I’m still trying hard to stay positive here. The main thing that dragged me down really hard was when I had a talk about things with Mirodir, and he just said “Yeah, I’ll study after I finish my apprenticeship.” Yeah, that hit me bad. I mean, he’s going to study after doing something I haven’t even had the chance to start, that’s a 3 years head starts on his side! And not only him, all the others are actually doing something with their lives, while I’m just sitting in my house all day, playing games. I went to the doctor and told him everything, eventually started crying again and he said I should maybe stay home a week or two and get my mind together. He also said it wouldn’t be a bad idea to visit a psychologists, and although I’m a little scared of that, I can see the reason of it. I tried calling some, but knowing my luck, they’re all currently in vacation and it usually takes months to actually get a spot in those places.

 

Oh look, it started hailing outside.

 

While I have been talking to a somewhat-psychologist at this thing I’m going to (careful, it’s German!) I’ve never really had a talk with a real one. She, however, told me that if I’m having so much trouble figuring out what to be, and finding an apprenticeship for something I don’t even like, I should maybe try and skip the whole apprenticeship part and just work on something I like, and you know what? She kind of inspired me to really do that. The things I’d like to do most in life are probably playing games competitive and being paid through streams and what not, or writing stories and having people buy them or donate to me directly. While it’s nigh-impossible with my current computer hardware to stream in High Quality and that’s usually a thing what you need to attract a couple of people, it should be understandably hard for me to start my business as a professional gamer. I’ve written stories before, a great many, but only ever shared little. I’ve also never gotten myself too much into it because it was just a hobby that wasn’t as fun as my other hobbies. So, I figure if I’m going to stay at home for a couple of months after this thing I’m going to ends, I might as well start writing stories again. I will start anew however, I’ve got this big fantasy story in my head about a Satyr that’s sort of lost and cannot find the rest of his herd, so thus begins a journey where he meets quite some interesting other creatures. I’m also going to make it partly sexual, maybe with additional parts of the story since I’m mostly aiming for an audience of all ages, but since I will host it on furry sites, since it’s going to be a furry story (since I heard they pay really well for good stories) it will probably bring me more money to include some stuff.

 

The hail stopped, it’s now only raining.

 

Who would’ve thought I’d type that much? Hah. Well, to be honest, I probably wouldn’t even have started writing a new post if it weren’t for this “Grayles” person on Steam who told me my blog was not working (which it was!). He’s also set his profile to private, so if he’s leaving me a comment I have no way of leaving him a comment on his page, so the conversation between us is, literally, pretty one-sided.

 

I’ve had quite some drama over Twitter regarding things like pedophilia and lolicon, and I’d like to clear up some things here as well, since I’m at it (I’m not actually “at it” I just kind of had that in my mind). I’m not a lolicon. That should confuse quite some people out there, but it’s the truth. I wasn’t even aware of that myself until some people sat down with me, talked to me about the topic and all of its content and consequences. Fact is, I don’t think like the average lolicon, I act very different, and I also don’t approve with the things most pedophiles do, but feel yet strangely attracted to little girls. It’s not like I’d ever consider doing something with a little girl, I’ve only had those thoughts in my head, but when someone explained to me that it’s actually hurting the girls, no matter how you approach the subject, I rapidly changed my mind about it. I wasn’t aware that you could mentally break a girl by just having sex with her at a very young age, because certain parts of her brain will start to work different. And as for the lolicon part, we’ve combined that I’m not so much a lolicon as I just like the Unexpected™. Basically, this means I’m just attracted that things that are out of the norm, or that would not happen in real life (or are just very unlikely). This was heavily reinforced by the fact that I’m a fan of mature girls in a smaller body, which was still referred to lolicon, but had little to nothing to do with lolicon as it usually refers to little girls. And I really don’t have any interest in innocent, inexperienced little girls. But the Unexpected™ also includes things like slutty nuns, for example. Or monster girls in general. I have mentioned how I have a fetish for horns? And you know how much I dig slime girls, right? Yeah, things like that don’t exist in the real world, they’re fiction, and that’s apparently a thing I’m sexually attracted to, as weird as that sounds.

 

It’s still raining outside, but it’s getting less.

 

It wouldn’t surprise me if this is going to be the longest post I have ever written. To be honest, I’m not happy with how my blog currently looks. The outfit is real nice and all that, but using this current theme just makes it feel so restricted (which is probably because of the fact that the theme has restrictions). And I think my own site shouldn’t give me that feeling. If I want that, I could’ve just created a wordpress blog instead. On the other hand, it takes so much time changing things that I’m really way too lazy to give a fuck. I’d need to find a theme that really suits me perfectly, I’d have to tell my admin guy to install it (because I can’t just upload them automatically, since the site I’m hosting it on is being a bitch and complaining that it’s too big). There’s so much stuff to be done then, like, managing colors, creating banners, creating a header. I mean, I have a person which I could ask to get going, but then again, I don’t know how I want it to look. It should look stylish, but it should fit with the blog design. Then we have the problem again that I don’t know how my blog is going to look like since I have no theme in mind. There’s so many things that just complicate this whole ordeal where it could be so simple. Also I just recently noticed I had three comments, but my comment moderation prevented them from being displayed so I had to approve them. Kind of a neat feature, really, but I don’t think a great many spammers are going to come here and, well, spam. But you never know, I guess. Better safe than sorry.

 

It stopped raining.

 

I’m slowly running out of ideas about what to write. I don’t necessarily want to mention which games I’m playing because there isn’t really much variety to it right now. I’m seldom getting into games as much as I used to, and even then I’m just quickly and occasionally mentioning them while probably forgetting a whole lot of other stuff. One thing I have kind of told myself I’d do, though, is to implement a video of something I like in each blog post, regardless of topic. Like that, no matter how bland or boring my wall of test might sound, you can still show interest by merely watching the videos and looking at the pretty pictures I’m uploading. Like the following. That is my absolutely favorite soundtrack out of all of Homestuck’s songs.

 

 

 

I think so far, that’s it for today. As always, I’m really going to try and write more, after all, I’m trying to make it my career! Writing is lots of fun, if I think about it, but I suppose I’m just often too lazy and/or exhausted to write a post, but since I’m free right now I can maybe spend some time updating my blog, I think everyone can happily agree to that. So can I.

 

Keep ‘em peeled, people!

 

[edit]Welcome to my new blog!

I hope you have been as eagerly awaiting this very moment as much as I did! Well, even if not, it’s not like you’re going to tell me right in my face, hah!

 

Way too much happened, way, way too much. It’s been a whole bloody month! I’ve lost many, many good friends, some of which have probably been my own fault, others of which I had nothing to do with. I’ve played many games, too many to count, also too many to keep track of since I can’t remember which ones I’ve mentioned and which ones I haven’t, but it’s all too much reading and writing so I’ll just stick with “a lot”.

 

 

 

I guess life has been as unfulfilling as usual, with its puny attempts to stop me from being absolutely awesome. Oh, yes, I stopped being depressive. Well, at least I started trying! I noticed that it was mostly received negatively and dragged my friends down a lot, and if it’s one thing I can’t stand, then it’s making my friends miserable because of something I did. And Brussels sprouts. God I hate Brussels sprouts.

 

Anime, right, have I mentioned that I completed Bakemonogatari? Yes, quite a time ago, even! Oh, yes, and I’ve also finished Doctor Who. And I’ve started watching Nisemonogatari. Yes, I have been quite busy in the watching-department this time, and I do not intend to change that! Because I don’t have to, change usually occurs all by itself, haha.

 

This new blog is pretty cool, but with all advantages, there are several disadvantages at hand. For example, the whole slideshow of my pictures is nice, but it won’t let me display my blog on the front page or let me edit the favicon of my blog. I actually had to disable the front page in order to force my blog to appear on the front page. Talk about making things unnecessarily complicated for the sake of money. I also had to buy my own domain name, which also wasn’t quite the most satisfying adventure I’ve been on. It was so hard to find a seller that accepts money from PayPal even without credit card. And the whole MySQL and admin area? Yeah, fucking impossible to read. I have a cool person from Twitter that agreed to help me set this up, so I’m kinda happy that it worked out in the end. I suppose it could look better, and this layout is probably also only temporary, but for now it’ll have to stick so I’m making the best that I can out of it.

 

This is all I have to say for now, oh noes! “Wow, this asshole doesn’t post for a month and this is all he’s saying?”, I’m sorry, angry follower, I never meant to upset you in any way! In fact, you are the sole reason I’m doing this, so please bear with me! I will try to post more, I promise! I have also put a Twitter widget on the site so you can stalk me there as well, although it’s sort of weird because it keeps referring to me as “We”.

 

I love you, guys! Stay sharp!