fmhty

June 23rd, 2011

12:08 pm

 

Remember in elementary school when it was such a big deal on who you like? You’ll always have that one kid that says EW ALYSSA LIKES HIM, ALYSSA LIKES HIM! And you’re just on the urge of crying but you don’t since you want to look strong?

 

Well, I’m opposite of that. When I was little, anybody who came up to me and made fun of who I liked, I would basically slap them across the face. So that is why I was never made fun of. I’m not a tom boy. I mean you could consider me as it, since I hang with all boys and tougher than most girls would act.

 

But that’s my personality. Nobody can change it, no matter what they say or try to do.

 

Yeah, I dress up occasionally with jeans and a descent cute shirt. But I’m not the preppy girl who wears clothes that are more expensive than my car.

 

“Butler, pass me the red bull.” I said pulling my hand out behind me as my other hand was controlling my person on call of duty. My eyes were glued to the TV trying my entirely best to beat Justin.

 

I felt my hand grab the cold red bull. I opened it while concentrating on the game. “You’re welcome…” He mumbled a bit annoyed.

 

I rolled my eyes and ignored him. “Lys, you’re throwing bombs like everywhere, chill.” Justin joked.

 

“I throw whatever I want.” I laughed taking a sip of my drink.

 

As we played for another minute, finally Justin came out of nowhere killing me getting exactly one more kill than me. He got up throwing his arms in the air. “BOO YA!”

 

“Screw this! I’m going to make some Mac and cheese, who wants some?” I asked giving them exactly three seconds to answer.

 

They all raised their hands, all five. I groaned and ran up the stairs. As I put the macaroni in the pot I heard someone running up the stairs. I was about to turn around to yell at them considering I told them many times to ask before they go upstairs. Instead I kept my mouth shut since it was Justin.

 

He closed the door behind him and walked over to the stool in the middle of the kitchen taking a seat. He took one of the strawberries out of the bowl my mom had left on the counter, plopping it in his mouth. “Hey.” He said plainly.

 

“Hi…” I said with a smirk weirded out.

 

I pulled a stool next to him sitting also grabbing a straw berry. “Are you coming with us to the baseball game?” He asked me.

 

“Obviously.” I remarked as I put the strawberry in my mouth. “Why wouldn’t I?”

 

“I don’t know. Chaz said you weren’t really excited about it…” He spoke bitterly rubbing the back of his neck.

 

Justin was definitely the best looking one from my group of boys. He was also the one I was the closest with. Not only did I talk to him like he was God, but I also treated him like he was the most special person in my life. I’m not gonna lie—he’s one of them.

 

My eyes squinted as I ate my strawberry slowly staring at him. “And you believe Chaz…” I trailed off making him sound stupid. I knew exactly what I was doing today, before the baseball game. Something none of the boys but my family knows about.

 

He stared into my eyes for a few seconds looking like he was thinking. “Yeah, bad idea.” He said snapping his fingers. I nodded eating more of the strawberries with him. “Uh, Lys, the macaroni’s over flowing.” I turned around quickly and saw that they were falling out of the pot with bubbles coming out of the pot, dripping down speedily. I quickly rushed over to the stove and closed it.

 

I sighed in relief and looked over at Justin who was laughing at me. I crossed my arms. “How am I gonna be a mom when I’m older?” I asked him.

 

He walked over to me patiently. He grabbed the wooden spoon and moved the burnt macaroni around. “Don’t know, but I feel bad for your kids. They’re gonna have to eat burnt macaroni.”

 

I hit him with towel next to me laughing as he did also. “Shut up!”

 

 

 

“I’ll see you guys later. Don’t worry, I’ll be at the game you freaks.” I assured them kicking them all out of my house.

 

Finally, Chaz turned around. “Why do we always have to leave at random times? We could all go together.”

 

“I have girl thing’s to do.” I said in his face obviously.

 

He rolled his eyes. “You? Doing girl things?” Jason joked.

 

“Yeah man. That’s weird, you’re obviously up to something.” Shane spoke out.

 

I rolled my eyes at all the boys. “Just don’t worry about me, I’m fine.” I assured them once again. They all nodded and walked towards their cars. Justin stood there not moving in front of my door.

 

“Tell me what’s going on. You haven’t been the same lately.” Justin spoke out to me honestly. He’s the one who knows everything about me. Knows when I’m lying.

 

“Nothing.” I answered back to him. He didn’t buy it.

 

“I’m your best friend Alyssa. Why do you have to lie to me? Why can’t you just tell me the truth?” He asked coming closer.

 

I began to shiver as his body lingered in front of mine. I took a deep breath and spoke, “I’m fine Justin.”

 

He glared at me with disappointment. “See you later.” He said back coldly before taking a few steps back glaring at me as he did, and turning to walk towards his car.

 

I sighed under my breath and watched him get in his car before getting back in the house. “Mom, I’m ready.” I yelled out loud.

 

 

 

July 11th, 2011

7:09 pm

 No POV:

 

She was at Justin’s house for a grill when it happened. She got up from the seat still laughing at Justin who kept missing the hamburger. After the day he begged her to tell him what’s wrong, he would ask her again when she randomly needs to be somewhere. He even tried asking her mom, but she always showed up ‘interrupting’ his conversation.

 

He was worried, but tonight he didn’t think about what might be her problem. “Ryan go grab me another energy drink please!” She begged. They weren’t really good for her. Her doctor told her stay away considering it just makes things worse but she can’t help it. Plus the guys don’t know anything so they didn’t think it would hurt to give it her.

 

He threw one at her and she caught it, opening the can up. After drinking one drink she walked up to Justin and helped him cook the patties. She felt her heart quicken. She felt the rush come through her like it always does from drinking Red bull. This time though, it was way worse.

 

“You know, my professor said that I got only one wrong on my physics exam.” She said with a smile proudly.

He glanced over at her shocked. “Good job Lys! I’m proud of you!”

 

She giggled, something she doesn’t tend to do considering she’s not the girliest girl you would meet. “Thanks, I studied all night for it and finally got a good grade.”

 

“Looks like it was worth it.” He grinned. She nodded and began coughing and breathing oddly. He glanced over at her with her hand on her forehead. She was looking down frowning as if she’s had a headache. “You okay?” He asked worriedly trying to help her.

 

“Yeah, I’m fine.” She lied before coughing loudly again.

 

“You are not fine!” He yelled loudly. “Tell me what the hell is up right now Alyssa.” He yelled forcing her to speak.

 

“I’ll tell you, after we eat.” She promised. He wanted to know now but he could wait a little. He was still angry at her and he only nodded. “You need help?” She asked him. He nodded and handed her a plate with burgers.

 

“Thanks.” He said to her softly. He glanced over at her, she was so beautiful. She smiled.

 

She nodded at him before walking towards the table putting the plate on the table. All the boys were laughing at her weird walking.

 

She wasn’t walking straight, but she didn’t even drink alcohol. They were confused but somehow thought she was joking around like she always does.

 

Justin glanced behind him. He smiled a little but his smile soon faded as he saw her face.

 

She looked like she was in pain. He ran to her but as he did, she dropped and he caught her in his arms. The boys all ran as they stopped laughing.

 

“Alyssa!” They yelled trying to wake her up.

 

“Go call the ambulance she’s not breathing!” Justin yelled as he checked her pulse. One of the boys quickly got the phone and called 911.

 

As Justin stared at her trying every way for her to breathe, he heard Shane quickly talking on the phone panicking.

 

July 12th, 2011

8:32 am

 

Beep…Beep…Beep…

 

I got up feeling a hard aching in my chest. It felt a lot better than it usually does though. Too better…I looked around slowly seeing the same room I always go into. My mom sprung off her seat and got a glimpse of me. Her eyes were bloodshot. She looked extremely devastated.

 

“Mom?” I said with my throat feeling rough.

 

“Baby!” She screamed trying to hug me. It hurt a little I groaned softly. She quickly got off me.

 

The doctor came in seconds later with a clip board. “Look who’s awake.” He said.

 

I glanced over at him. “What happened to me?” I asked him.

 

“Well, you had a heart surgery last night. You finally got a donor after you had a heart attack at your friends-“ the doctor explained.

 

I interrupted quickly remembering, “Where’s my friends? Where’s Justin?”

 

I felt the room get silent. My mom looked away nervously. The doctor couldn’t even speak but looked down slowly. Then, something came in mind. I was utterly shocked. “Where is Justin?” I had tears in my eyes.

 

“Well Alyssa…” My mom tried to say.

 

“Where is he?” I yelled once again in tears.

 

The doctor finally started to speak. “Well, Alyssa… He had made a commitment to donate his—“

 

I busted out in tears. “So he’s gone?” I said softly.

 

They didn’t answer just watched my quietly. My mom even tried to sooth my back. “Why didn’t any of you stop him?” I asked loudly.

 

“I’m very sorry. But he really committed into doing this. He saved your life Alyssa.” The doctor explained. “If it wasn't for him, I'm afraid you would have not been here today.”

 

I kept crying. Why would he do this?

 

“We’ll leave you to calm down.” My mother spoke before putting something softly in front of me. She headed towards the door, as did the doctor.

 

After crying in my arms for minutes I finally looked in front of me. In front of my sheets was a paper.

 

Hi Lys,

Well first off, I wanted to write you this before I go in the room and be superman :)

I knew you practically my whole life and their isn’t a thing I wouldn’t do for you.

When I saw you fall, I panicked. I almost had a heart attack myself Alyssa. Anyways, I thought you would like this cause maybe it would make you at least smile? :) eh eh?

This note reminds me of the times where we fought and I would give you flowers and note for my apology since I wasn’t the guy for saying sorry. Now by the time you’ve read this, you probably just found out about the news and freaked out.

Please don’t. I did this so you could live your life. You’re in an amazing college; you are an amazing tough girl. The doctor even said he was surprised you weren’t whining about the pain you were going through. Why didn’t you tell me Alyssa? I knew the WHOLE time there was something wrong… but just know that I LOVE YOU. Probably more than a guy should love a girl. You’re not just a best friend, you’re everything to me. I would probably marry you if I had the chance. (not kidding)

And by the way, just know I’m always there, by your side. Just talk to me in your dreams and I’ll be there, I promise :)

I love you. Live your life. I promise you won’t have to go through that pain anymore.

From my heart to yours, literally,

-Justin