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Zombies and sex, and whatnot.

By: a guest on Jul 19th, 2012  |  syntax: None  |  size: 1.31 KB  |  views: 48  |  expires: Never
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  1. Once upon a time their were just tons of fucking zombies. Like seriously, every-fucking-where. And given humanities track record of fucking anything that is anything, its only natural to assume that at some point, a man would ruthlessly tie down a she-zombie, and fuck it senseless. Well, if you thought that, not only would you be a pervert, you'd also be correct.
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  3.         This particular incident involves a young guy around the age of 23. One day, tired of masturbating to the thought of getting some sick, slick, zombie bonin' on, he decided he would go up and get him some real sweet zombpoon. After spending quite a long time tying down his undead rape victim to be, over the arm of an old chair found in an old house, he started getting all kinds of freaky up on that unholy zombie snatch. Afterwards, he got terrible, terrible dickrash, and died an agonizing death.
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  5.         Yeah, a little bit anti-climactic, but the dude was fucking an unliving, walking pile of infected human tissue. Might as well of put his dick in a murdered Las Vegas dumpster hooker. The moral of the story is, if you're trying to survive the apocalypse, don't try and have sex with the entity that is directly causing the aforementioned apocalypse.
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  7. I mean, independence day didn't have a Jeff Goldblum/Alien buttsex scene, and that was for a good damn reason.