Yandumb Wurm Antics

A lot shorter than I expected/wanted it to be. Probably just gonna be "funny" ideas that are poorly executed. Might have more in the future

	The drip of water was the only sound that could be heard until Anon awoke. With a start and a few groans, he rubbed his head, recovering from what he felt like was a concussion. He took a quick look at his surroundings to find himself in what appeared to be normal looking but unfamiliar basement. Unable to discern fine details through his currently blurred vision, he could still make out a variety of objects to his right, like a number of syringes and aphrodisiacs as well as a calendar of… ovulation.
	However, even with his head feeling like a split melon, he could guess to whom the basement belonged to. A split second later, his guess was confirmed to be true. As his blurred vision finally came into focus, he saw the face of his all too familiar captor slightly off to his left, with an empty grin and eyes whose depths seemed endless staring back at him. Seeing her long, dusty black hair triggered his short term memory as he remembered getting head butted by her on his way back from the store. For the second time this week. “Ugh, Whitney, what’s going on… this time?”
	“Kukuku, I’ve finally got you trapped now, my love,” she cooed, slowly and deliberately as if she had rehearsed. In fact, she probably DID rehearse this. “You were so vulnerable out there that I just had to do something to protect you.”
	“Like kidnap me and hide me away under here?” Anon caustically inquired. A quick and enthusiastic series of nods was her reply.
	“In here, we’ll be all alone. No one will be able to bother us in our love, my dear Anon,” she exclaimed. “But just to make sure you won’t escape my love, I made sure to tie myself up so you can’t get away. It’ll be our own little world.”
	‘Alright, this is like her sixth attempt at keeping me, it shouldn’t be too hard to get out-‘ “Wait, you tied… yourself up?” Another series of quick and enthusiastic nods followed. Dumbfounded, Anon looked down at himself to find that he had merely been sat in a chair by her. "So… to keep ME here, you tied YOURSELF up?”
	“Yup, so don’t even try to esca- HEY, what are you doing!?” she frantically shouted as Anon rose from his chair with a rather disappointed look on his face.
	“Whitney, for the next few minutes I want you to look over your plan. I have to go make dinner.” Plus she wouldn’t be disabled for long after she remembers she can probably just break out of any bindings she foolishly placed on herself.
	“W-wait, how did you do it?! Give me a hint at least!” she begged as she comically hopped around with her tail sweeping the entire floor.
And the week just started, too.

Dinner
	Luckily Whitney was kind enough to carry Anon’s groceries after he was incapacitated. Taking his bags, he quickly exited Whitney’s home and crossed the street into his own. It wouldn’t be too long before she was over for dinner, but he had enough time to take a shower. As he showered, he heard the expected entrance of Whitney who made sounds towards the kitchen.
	“Oh no, is she going to try and cook again?” Anon openly wondered as he began to rush his shower. Dried and dressed, he quickly entered the kitchen to find a rather sad looking Whitney holding a knife. Even her normally wagging tail was drooping now. “What’s with the long face, Whitney?” Anon asked while cautiously approaching her.
	“Well after I messed up my proposal earlier I wanted to cook to make up for it,” she sputtered out. “But I can’t even cut myself right!”
	“What? Why would you need to cut yourself… to cook?” Anon asked.
	“I wanted to put part of myself into the batter mix so we could be one… but… but…”
	“But what?”
	“My wrist scales are too hard for me to cut!”
	After hearing this, Anon quickly examined the scales on her wrist to see noticeable scuff marks from his kitchen knife, which was now, no doubt, dull and useless. He wasn’t entirely sure if he was supposed to feel bad for the crazy girl in front of him or terrified of what she what she wanted to do. However, he could only say the first thing that came to mind. “Wow, your scales are pretty tough. I’ve heard that wurms were durable but this is beyond what I thought. You probably could protect me with that,” Anon said with a chuckle.
	Whitney began to visibly cheer up at the compliment. “R-really?” she excitedly asked, clasping her clawed hands near her face, knife still in hand to create a rather terrifying and beautiful pose.”
	“Yea, no doubt. Tell you what, go ahead and sit down and I’ll go ahead and make your favorite tempura for you.” With that, she excitedly slithered off to the dining room table, knocking over a small desk in the process. With a sigh, Anon could only say one thing: “What a yandumb wurm.”