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lvl2dragontamer

[moofing intensifies]

Dec 26th, 2013
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  1. No.57313101 MOOFings Intensify
  2. >tfw slumming it with angry, redhead Scottish girl that I picked up drunk on my way home to my apartment
  3. >ANGRY SEX
  4. >ANGRY ANGRY ANGRY SEX
  5. >she slaps me around
  6. >I call her A
  7. >tfw I CAME
  8. >tfw seeing her out the door the next morning
  9. >tfw open the door and Anna is standing there, mid-knock
  10. >tfw sister sees me post sex with freaky ginger girl and the smell of cunt is fucking STEAMING out of my room
  11. >tfw the dyke smiles "Ye that A garl? Oi, anonette, fancy a threesome? I'm still feelin' randeh."
  12. >dying
  13. >dying
  14. >dying
  15. >dying
  16.  
  17.  
  18. No.57313522
  19. >Confused about sexuality whole life
  20. >Go to college
  21. >Cute redhead girl in one of my classes
  22. >She's always joking with people, surrounded by friends, 2cool4me
  23. >One day she sits by me
  24. >Notices I'm reading Ivanhoe
  25. >Is super knowledgeable about it but also just bitching about the English
  26. >Start talking about romantic era books
  27. >Holy shit there's a connection here
  28. >Class starts but we pass notes the whole time
  29. >When class ends she asks for my number
  30. >Somehow I manage to give it to her
  31.  
  32. How is something good happening to me, now I just know I'll screw something up soon.
  33.  
  34. OhgodwhatifIgaveherthewrongnumber
  35.  
  36.  
  37. No.57313593
  38. >be friends with 16 yr old redhead
  39. >not the hot kind of rehead: dirty ginger
  40. >keep her as a friend even though she's sort of gross/embarrasing because she is the only friend i've made in years
  41. >we play video games every week
  42. >she likes /b/ and 9gag
  43. >tfw 21 and hanging out with a 16 year old
  44. >one night she asks me if i want to watch bound
  45. >what the fuck we've never watched a movie together before
  46. >she pulls out a fucking blatantly lesbian film
  47. >the packaging is all crusty and filmy looking like its been watched a billion times
  48. >can't even get my mind together before she pops it in the ps3
  49. >what the fuck
  50. >can't say no, sit as far away as possible which isn't very possible due to my twin bed
  51. >movie starts. it's terrible and a fucking camrip with low audio quality
  52. >why.jpeg
  53. >feel her hand on my thigh out of fucking nowhere
  54. >"ah know ye have a thing fur redheads"
  55. >ask her what shes talking about
  56. >'i saw tha pics on yar computer. you dint have tae say anything, yah dirrrty lesbian"
  57. >she means my huge redhead lesbian folder of girls who look like my sister
  58. >fuckinghelp.jpeg
  59. >excuse myself to the bathroom
  60. >realise it just looks like i went to freshen up
  61. >realise i might have to fuck this soulless ginger girl tonight while she screams EET MAH MOOF over and over
  62. >realise its what i deserve for having these deranged thoughts about my sister
  63.  
  64.  
  65. No.57314197
  66. OH GOD I FUCKED UP BIG TIME ROBOTS
  67.  
  68. >be me
  69. >walking home from class
  70. >here cat calls from behind me
  71. >must be one of those sluts wearing skinny jeans
  72. >two Chad McThundercocks come up to me
  73. >ohshit.png
  74. >they invite me to this party
  75. >y-you too....
  76. >get home
  77. >tell sister A about it
  78. >she gets excited
  79. >'Oh, Anonette you should go! It'll be a great way to meet new people.'
  80. >love her when she gets like this
  81. >reluctantly go
  82. >this party sucks
  83. >it's too warm
  84. >the musics too loud....
  85. >do nothing but drink all night
  86. >getting ready to head home when someone says
  87. >'OI CUTIE WER YE GOIN?'
  88. >turn around and see this red head qt3.14
  89. >pretty sure it's the alcohol but she looks just like my sister A
  90. >she starts talking to me
  91. >i nod my head in response because the alcohol is starting to get to me
  92. >she looks more and more like A
  93. >she starts stroking my hair
  94. >fuckingshit.tif
  95. >she takes me to a room
  96. >starts kissing me
  97. >kiss gets passionate
  98. >i moan 'Oh A~!' silently
  99. >she goes down on me
  100. >starts licking me....there
  101. >moan A's name even louder until I cum
  102. >realize what i just did and who i was thinking about
  103. >imsofuckedup.avi
  104. >lay in the afterglow reflecting on what just happened
  105. >before i know it she grabs my head down to her crotch saying 'ALRIGHTY LASS I'S TIME FOR YOU TO EET MAH MOOF'
  106. >next thing i know im tonguing red hairy 'moof'
  107. >she keeps repeating 'EET MAH MOOFEET MAH MOOFEET MAH MOOF'
  108. >cant breath
  109. >on the brink of tears
  110. >she's finally finished
  111. >'OH LASS, YOU KNOW HOW TO MOUISTIN A HAGGIS '
  112. >get dressed
  113. >run home as fast as i can
  114. >sister A is at the door to greet me
  115. >'Anonette! How was your party?'
  116. >f-fine....just leave me alone
  117. >get to my room
  118. >trying to hold back the tears
  119. >pick a long red hair out from my teeth
  120. >start crying harder than ive ever cried before
  121.  
  122. NOT ONLY DID AM I IN LOVE WITH MY SISTER BUT IVE WASTED MY FIRST ON SOME CURLY HAIRED HAGGIS SMELLING DYKE!!!
  123.  
  124.  
  125. No.57314255
  126. /r9kelsa and merida continued
  127.  
  128. >been in the bathroom for about ten minutes
  129. >decide to come out and tell her i'm not interested as firmly as possible because she's had trouble taking a hint before blaming it on her assburgers
  130. >open door
  131. >she's completely naked
  132. >cannot even think
  133. >"me wee minx acting all coy"
  134. >what the fuck does that even mean?!
  135. >look at her body, realise it is actually kind of hot
  136. >tight in all the right places and aside from the overwhelming excess of freckles and the face, i'm starting to get wet
  137. >maybe i can have sex with her?
  138. >decide i can close my eyes and let her eat me out, thinking its A. might be able to get through this night alive.
  139. >tell her i'll do it
  140. >no such luck
  141. >shoves me down into her pubes
  142. >fucking MILLIONS of them oh god
  143. >red as the earth
  144. >'meh bint buscuit is getting randy elsa"
  145. >Mind is blank in a sea of terror
  146. >she pushes my face down into the abyss and rubs it around
  147. >i'm eating pussy and having sex for the first time and its with an insane ginger girl
  148. >not my sister
  149. >what i fucking deserve for this silent hell that i live on earth
  150. >feel something in teeth
  151. >slowly wrap my self in a coccoon of horror
  152. >pull mouth away
  153. >a pube cluster
  154. >run into the bathroom again and don't come out
  155. >she swears at me for 15 minutes straight before leaving
  156. >lost my only friend that day and still have fucking nightmares about it every day
  157.  
  158.  
  159. No.57314438
  160. >>57313522
  161.  
  162. >Days pass
  163. >Haven't heard from redhead (M) at all
  164. >Depression sets in from me missing my one chance for a friend
  165. >Class has been cancelled the past few times so I can't even see her there
  166. >Just lie in bed all the time
  167. >Sister tries to cheer me up and take me out shopping
  168. >She's on her phone a lot more than usual and laughing at it A LOT
  169. >After a few hours of this I get the courage to ask what's up, assuming it's just some asshole she's texting
  170. >She says some random girl texted her and now they're talking a lot
  171. >Slowly realize what happened
  172. >See me and my sister have almost the same phone number
  173. >Ask about who she's texting
  174. >It's M
  175. >Oh god oh god confrontation oh god what do I do
  176. >Oh...um..sis, that's um a friend I met in class and meant to give MY number too
  177. >Sister gets super red and sorry and apologizes profusely and says she immediately texts Merida my number and then puts Merida's number in my phone and makes me text her
  178. >Sister explains her name never came up because she assumed it was someone she gave her # to and forgot
  179. >Great now I'm freaking out from first text anxiety
  180. >Phone beeps "Oy ya icy bitch, why'd ye go do a cunt thing like give me a fake number :P"
  181. >Oh no she hates me
  182. >Sister calms me down and says it's a joke, text her back, make a joke, and offer to take her to lunch or something as a sorry for the fuckup.
  183. >Now we're going to get lunch and book shopping tomorrow thanks to my sister's help texting
  184. >tfw you have such a great beautiful helpful amazing sister, what would I do without her.
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