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eleneimich

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May 22nd, 2015
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  1. One of my men was younger than the others. His name was Lak, and he was about fifteen, only a little taller than me, dark-haired, wiry, and strong. He seemed a little brighter than the usual Zhid. Not that Zhid were stupid.
  2.  
  3. Most of them were intelligent and powerful. But if you were to think of them like metal, you'd say the Zhid were made of iron, not silver. Maybe it was because they never thought of anything but hatred, battle, and death.
  4.  
  5. That's all they need, Parven had told me. That's how they serve you.
  6.  
  7. By the second month of my command, we were taking long marches into the red cliffs that were the southern boundary of our encampment. We practiced disappearing into caves and niches and the long, narrow shadows, climbed impossibly steep tracks carrying heavy packs of water and food, and survived for days at a time with no sound and no movement and only the most minimal sustenance. Of course I had to do all these things with my troops, and I could not complain lest they think me weak.
  8.  
  9. Lak and I always climbed together, for we were lighter and so had an easier time scrambling over rocks and crevasses. One day we got to the top of a rocky ridge while the rest of the men were still out of sight below us. The day was murderously hot, and when I reached for my waterskin, I found it empty, a ragged rip in the side. I had not allowed a water stop for several hours. My mouth felt like iron, and my head throbbed, but I could see no remedy. I was the commander. I could show no weakness.
  10.  
  11. Lak was panting and red-faced. As he pulled out his own water skin, he glanced at mine, and his eyes grew wide. "Your water, sir."
  12.  
  13. "Unfortunate," I said, looking off in another direction- any direction but his bulging waterskin.
  14.  
  15. "But it will be hours until we reach the camp."
  16.  
  17. "It is the way it is."
  18.  
  19. "If you would honor me…" He pushed his waterskin into my hands, nodding his head ever so slightly down the hill. No one was in sight. It would be only moments until the others came into view, and I was already feeling desperate at the thought of the long, hot afternoon. I said nothing, but nodded in return and took a sip of the warm, stale liquid that tasted as good as anything I'd ever drunk before. I was amazed. I had never seen a Zhid share anything. This is dangerous, whispered Parven. You know it.
  20.  
  21. If I don't take it, I'll risk collapsing in front of them, I thought, maintaining silence with Lak. He'll not tell anyone.
  22.  
  23. Lak was the only one of my men that ever smiled. He smiled on that morning when I shared his water and again a few days later when he was sparring with me and got in a decent lick that left me in the dirt on my backside.
  24.  
  25. "A commander does not spar with his troops," said Kovrack, his small mouth set hard, his empty eyes glaring at Lak as the soldier walked away.
  26.  
  27. "I choose to do so, in this case," I said. "I don't want to lose practice while I'm in the field. None of your practice slaves are the right size, and Lak needs the work, too. I can't let him be lax just because he's small."
  28.  
  29. Kovrack and Parven were both annoyed with me. But it was the most enjoyable practice I'd had since I'd come to Zhev'Na. Because Lak was a soldier, he was allowed to wear leather practice armor when we sparred, so I was unlikely to damage him severely. The work was good for both of us, and we steadily improved.
  30.  
  31. Things were going well. The move to the desert had been all to the good.
  32.  
  33. "Young Lord," called Kovrack one morning as we were doing our dawn exercises. "I clocked your men running yesterday. They were not near fast enough."
  34.  
  35. "They've been dragging all week," I said, spinning on my heel and launching my knife at a wooden post halfway down the hill. The blade dug deep, right at the mark. And I was drawing it twice as fast as I could when I first came to the desert. "I plan to run them double time this morning."
  36.  
  37. When I walked down the rise for morning inspection, I told my troop what I intended. But our morning sword practice took much longer than I had calculated, and so the sun was almost at the zenith by the time we were ready to run. "I suppose I'll have to run them this evening instead," I said to Kovrack, who had come down to watch. To run in the midday sun could be deadly.
  38.  
  39. Kovrack curled his lip the way he always did when he thought I was being weak or stupid. "Indeed you will not, my lord. You told them they would run double time this morning. You cannot back down from your word. The news of your softness would travel throughout the entire camp by nightfall."
  40.  
  41. I looked around the cluster of tents. Several of the older men were already lounging in the shade of their tents, assuming I wouldn't make them run. They were the same warriors who never seemed to draw blood when they fought each other and looked sullen when I insisted they clean and polish their weapons every night. They were on the verge of not taking me seriously. I nodded to Kovrack. I understood.
  42.  
  43. "All of you malingerers, up. Now! Run!"
  44.  
  45. I ran them two hours in the desert noonday. At the end of the first hour they were dripping and panting. When they passed by the place where I stood watching them with my hands clasped behind my back, I didn't change my expression or say anything. They ran on. A half-hour more and they were laboring. One soldier dropped to his knees, holding his belly, about two hundred paces from where I stood watching. Cramps.
  46.  
  47. I was tempted to stop the exercise, but Kovrack was beside me, glaring, just waiting for me to show how weak I was. And Lord Parven was inside, whispering. You know what to do, young Lord. He is worthless if he cannot follow your commands. He knows it, too. A soldier has pride, or he will turn traitor when battle is hard. The warriors of Zhev'Na do not live if they do not obey.
  48.  
  49. I drew my sword and walked across the cracked ground to where the soldier had slumped over. It was Lak. I had a full waterskin at my belt, but it might as well have been at Comigor for all the good it could do him. I touched the point of my sword to his neck. "Run," I said.
  50.  
  51. His breath came in harsh gulps, and he didn't look up.
  52.  
  53. I pressed just enough harder to break the skin. "Run," I said again. I willed him to run; every muscle in my body begged him to get up. Slowly, he pushed himself up and staggered forward through the heat shimmer.
  54.  
  55. Only nine of the soldiers returned. The oldest one collapsed and died fifty paces from the end. Lak returned with the others, falling on the ground and grabbing for his waterskin.
  56.  
  57. What should you do? asked Parven. Has he obeyed your command completely?
  58.  
  59. He didn't have to tell me. I already knew what I had to do, even though I hated it. "Hold, Lak," I said. "You haven't finished the course."
  60.  
  61. Lak gaped at me stupidly, holding his middle, bent double with cramps.
  62.  
  63. "You were told to run double time, but you spent a quarter of an hour on the ground until I persuaded you to continue. You'll not drink with your obedient comrades until you've done what I told you." I kicked his waterskin out of his hand. A look of such hatred blossomed on his face that I drew my sword. "Run," I said.
  64.  
  65. He stood up and stumbled away. "Neto, clock him a quarter of an hour." I turned away and watched the other men drinking and wiping their faces. It seemed like a year until the other soldier gave the call. With a loud thud Lak collapsed behind me.
  66.  
  67. Well done. Parven was still with me. But you know you are not finished. He defied you. You had to tell him twice.
  68.  
  69. Lak lay on his back in the dirt. One of the other soldiers was dribbling water in his mouth. He coughed it up several times until his cramps eased enough to let him hold a little of it. I stood over him and watched him heave. He was weak. I could read it in his face, and he didn't think I could. He wasn't afraid of me at all.
  70.  
  71. And he must be. He defies you with his lack of fear. What will he do when you tell him to die for you? Will you have to tell him twice?
  72.  
  73. "Bind him," I said. "Ten lashes. Five for making me say it twice, and five for thinking I wouldn't notice that he shortened the time."
  74.  
  75. Lak started to protest, but I raised my hand. "One word… one whimper… one cry, and there will be ten more… and ten more after that."
  76.  
  77. I laid on the first two stripes myself, as a symbol of my authority, and then gave the whip to one of the other men who could do a better job of it. When it was done, I returned to my tent and had my slave bring water to wash off the blood and flesh that had spattered on me.
  78.  
  79. The Lords were pleased: It was necessary… Not pleasant… Perhaps now he will live to serve you… You learn the hardships of command…
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