One day, the Respectful and Nodding Tom Brevoort was jelqing his dick and shoveling slice after slice of pizza into his greasy foodhole. For Tom, the jelqing process was extremely painful due to starting from a near-microscopic size. He was taking X-TEND kickin' honey hot mustard homestyle ranch bluegrass horsey white sriracha smoky creamy easy breezy beautiful sauce-flavored Male Enhancement pills and tearing his member apart every day, brutally ripping the flesh and letting it heal, over and over again using a device that looked like a Spanish Inquisition jar opener. The agony was almost unbearable, but boy would it be worth it when he finally got up to his goal - 3 inches.

Then, all of a sudden, right in the middle of his agonizing jelq session, Steve Ditko slammed open the door to his room. The heavy wooden door fell with such force that the handle smashed through the drywall and even knocked over a few of his statushits. Stately 12" Resin Sam Alexander went flying through the glass case and shattered on the floor into thousands of pieces as if someone had run him through a paper shredder! Before he could sweep up the pieces and cry, Steve Ditko looked him right in his Costco Wholesale eyeglasses. Ditko must have been at least 8" tall and physically literally dripping with sweat that ran off his Deviantart muscle fetish body and pooled on the ground in a puddle soaking the shattered Sam Alexander in his skin juice. Steve Ditko got all up in Tom's face and said:

"What you think of as pain is only a shadow. Pain has a face. Allow me to show it to you. Tom Brevoort, I AM PAIN."

"Wait, isn't that from a movie?" Tom Brevoort thought to himself. But before he could say it out loud, Steve Ditko was slapping him back and forth at inhuman speed, at one point breaking the sound barrier and causing a sonic boom. It was a good thing, too. Tom Brevoort was briefly deafened by this so he couldn't hear Steve Ditko shrieking incoherently at him. One thing, though - Ditko was looking him right in the pupils, reaching through his very soul and channeling pure unfiltered hatred directly into his mind, almost as if he was telepathically screaming the worst insults you could imagine that sounded straight out of an HBO Original Series and injecting all kinds of cruel and unusual almost surreal or nightmare-like mental torture concentration camp Abu Ghraib punishments into his brain, such as forcing him to read Empowered.

That knocked Tom down a notch, but not enough to satisfy Ditko's physical need to inflict pain upon him. So while he thought of new and agonizing ways to torture Tom Brevoort, he repeatedly kicked him in his chubby greasy neck and screamed, not about anything in particular, just an eardrum-piercing cry at about 104 decibels. At this point, Tom was completely broken, shaking on the ground in tears at the very idea that anyone could dislike or hate him. "B-BUT I THOUGHT ANGRY FANS MEANT SALES! THEY'RE FANS, NOT JUST LOOTCRATE AND PEOPLE WHO WRITE NEWS WEBSITES! THEY LOVE ME!!!" Steve Ditko just laughed, grabbed Tom firmly by the throat, threw him into the air and punched & kicked his flabby hairy body over and over again, looking like Shang-Chi playing that one babysitter game with a deflated balloon.

Then after his little game was over, Ditko unzipped Brevoort's khaki shorts to reveal his freshly X-TENDed member. Steve Ditko clamped the jelqing device onto Tom Brevoort and started squeezing and pulling way too hard. Tom Brevoort was having a complete mental breakdown, no longer lucid, the sheer agony filling his mind and invading his every thought. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!", he cried as Steve Ditko jelqed too hard and completely tore off his penis, resulting in full crotchile annihilation. The hot groinblood splashed on Ditko's indifference face and all over Tom Brevoort's screaming red face and getting in his nose eyes and mouth. "WHAT THE FUCK!!!! WHAT THE FUCK!!!!! YOU TORE OFF MY FUCKING DICK!!!!!!!!! WHAAAAAAAAAAT??" Steve Ditko just laughed again and threw cut-up pieces of an issue of ROM all over him that stuck to his sweat and blood.

Steve Ditko then broke a bunch of his statushits, ate the rest of his pizza, and left making sure to lock the door behind him & throw away the key.  The end