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FluffandCrunch

Class of 2017 (Part Two)

Jul 27th, 2012
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  1. I quickly apologize to Miki for leaving, telling her that I'll catch up with her later on in the party. I go after Kenji to try and explain the situation. Knowing what he knows, what I've told him in private conversation at Manly Picnic, what Miki said is probably not going to be taken in the best light.
  2.  
  3. I bump into a few others at the party, but do my best to deflect conversation as politely as I can, continuing my search. I find Takeshi and Molly, the two of them talking. By talking I mean Takeshi is leaning against the wall, standing uncomfortably close to Molly while she tries her best to resist his clumsy advances, his confidence spurred on by one too many glasses of wine.
  4.  
  5. Neither of them has seen Kenji and Takeshi gives me a 'move along' look that tells me my presence is cramping his style. I leave the pair of them to their privacy, much to Molly's chagrin.
  6.  
  7. Finding myself lost among the party-goers, I halt my efforts to find Kenji, taking a few seconds to calmly breathe. I'm not running, but I'm nervous and my heart is pounding in my chest. I gulp down some air, close my eyes, and concentrate on my heartbeat, forcing it to slow down.
  8.  
  9. It'll be fine, I'll just find Kenji and explain everything to him.
  10.  
  11. Yeah right, that should work.
  12.  
  13. I'll just explain all that stuff I said about Hanako while drunk wasn't a big deal. That I haven't actually fallen in love with my Wife's best friend. I'll tell him that I couldn't possibly be having an affair with her. Even if I was, it's okay, because Lilly is totally cool with that. In fact, we're in an open relationship! Isn't that great?
  14.  
  15. A voice from behind me jars me out of my frenzied thoughts before I can continue my internal panic.
  16.  
  17. "There's the reason I was forced into early retirement," it says.
  18.  
  19. I turn around to face a pair of men coming out of the party towards me.
  20.  
  21. The first is tall and lanky, dressed in an old suit with a day's worth of growth on his face, a spider web of gray hair around the sides of his head and many deep lines around the edges of his eyes.
  22.  
  23. The second is a sharp looking man in a stylish-cut tuxedo, a suave and debonair bearing with a bright and eager smile on his face, a youthful and energetic presence to him.
  24.  
  25. It's the second man who responds to the observation of the first.
  26.  
  27. "Little bastard made my job a living hell! Every day, another episode. Kid caught a look at a pretty girl, down he went! I can't tell you how much of a pain this guy was."
  28.  
  29. Momentarily distracted from my search for Kenji, I find myself faced with Mutou and Nurse, the two men walking towards me.
  30.  
  31. I'm stunned by Mutou's appearance and his attendance here, the years since we last met in person clear on his face.
  32.  
  33. The two men reach me and Nurse gives a playful slap to Mutou's chest.
  34.  
  35. "Hey, Hisao, look who I caught trying to bum a cigarette in the parking lot."
  36.  
  37. Mutou shrugs, his slim shoulders dipping nervously. "I never really liked these parties the Foundation threw, even when I was working for them. But when they send you an invitation, it isn't a summons you lightly turn down. When Caesar calls, after all."
  38.  
  39. Mutou smiles, a warmer and more open gesture than I remember it being before. "How are you doing, Nakai? It's good to see you again."
  40.  
  41. I blink a couple of times, trying to catch up with my thoughts.
  42.  
  43. Mutou looks...old!
  44.  
  45. The grey in his hair is shocking to me and the lines on his face are from age, not the tired, worn look I remember from school. I know I haven't seen him in a few years, but the change is both startling and unsettling for me.
  46.  
  47. This isn't the awkward, nervous wreck I remember from when I was younger. Though he looks older, I can't help but notice the brightness in his eyes that was never there before, the way he stands straighter and holds himself. He may have aged, but he looks somehow younger!
  48.  
  49. I laugh and grab him by the shoulders, hugging my old teacher fondly, the man who helped me choose my life's work. For his part, he jerks somewhat, surprised by the gesture, but after a few moments, Mutou laughs back and gives me several hard pats on the back, the warm strikes smoothing over any awkwardness between us. We break apart and he looks taken aback, though still smiling.
  50.  
  51. "Damn," I say to him. "Mutou, it's been years!"
  52. "It's good to see you, Nakai. You look good!"
  53. "So do you! You look, you look great! You look...good! Happy!"
  54.  
  55. Mutou smiles, rubbing the back of his head. "Yeah, I guess I am."
  56.  
  57. "How has your work been? What about your research, how did you get the time away? For that matter, what are you doing here? Can you be away from your projects this long? How long are you going to be here?"
  58.  
  59. "Whoa, whoa!" he says, his arms up to slow me down. "Give me a second! Take a breather and let me answer one at a time."
  60.  
  61. "Sorry," I say, "I'm just floored to see you!"
  62. "Oh, come on, Nakai, we've correspond plenty of times."
  63. "Letters are one thing or reading about you in a magazine article, but seeing you face to face? We haven't met since...well, since you got me my job at Yamaku!"
  64.  
  65. Mutou looks a little nervous. "I didn't get you your job, Nakai, you did that all on your own."
  66. "You wrote me the letter of referral that got it for me!"
  67. "A formality, nothing more. The talent that impressed them was all your own. Being a former student helped more than I ever did. I doubt the Foundation even paid attention to what I wrote."
  68. I shake my head. "You can say that all you want, but it doesn't make it true. I have you to thank for this, Mutou."
  69. Mutou laughs and shrugs helplessly. "Well, if you say so."
  70. "I do say so."
  71.  
  72. I turn towards Nurse and give him a firm shake of the hand. "Sorry to ignore you there, Nurse."
  73. He smiles broadly, a wink in his eyes. "Me? Come on, you see me all the time at work, I'm sure by now you're sick of looking at this face! It's not every day you get to meet a celebrity like Mutou here!"
  74.  
  75. Mutou fidgets in his suit, habitually adjusting his sleeves. "I'm hardly a celebrity...."
  76.  
  77. "Barely," I point out. "I've been keeping up with your work, at least what I can find out about it. It's hard enough to keep track of you, but your letters and articles don't shed much light on exactly what you've been doing. Care to share with the rest of the class?"
  78.  
  79. Mutou smirks, looking away from the two of us. "You know I can't share much, Nakai. Government work, corporate research and development, you know how it is."
  80.  
  81. Nurse nudges him in the side. "Top secret stuff, huh? Have to kill us if you told us, right?"
  82.  
  83. Mutou rolls his eyes. "It's not top secret, although I may be leaving the country for a while."
  84.  
  85. My ears perk up when I hear that. "Oh? Because of work?"
  86. Mutou gets very circumspect. "Maybe," he states flatly.
  87. "Come on, give me something!"
  88.  
  89. Mutou fidgets nervously again. "Well, I may be headed to Europe for a few years."
  90.  
  91. "Do I see the Alpine slopes of Switzerland in your future? Perhaps a modest little compound in Geneva?"
  92.  
  93. "Knock it off, Nakai...."
  94.  
  95. "You're killing me, Mutou, say something!"
  96.  
  97. He looks nervously around. "Well, do you have a poster of the Periodic table in your classroom?"
  98.  
  99. "Of course."
  100.  
  101. Mutou grins. "You might need to get a new one in the next few years."
  102.  
  103. "Mutou, you rock star!" Nurse exclaims.
  104. "I am not a rock star...."
  105. "You're probably the closest thing you nerds get to one!" Nurse laughs.
  106.  
  107. "Come on!" I plead, "Tell me something! It must be fascinating!"
  108.  
  109. Mutou nods and for a moment I see his eyes light up. "You wouldn't believe how fascinating. If I could show you some of the work I've been doing, it would change everything you thought you knew. The lab I work in, Hisao, is phenomenal! I need something and I get it immediately. No scrambling for funding, no pleading for the next grant, just research, every day, more work. I never have down time, there's always something new to work on, some new test to run or theory to prove. I'm working with the greatest minds in the world! I feel like an ant in the land of giants!"
  110.  
  111. I'm smiling right alongside him to see his excitement. Even his slip of calling me by my first name is indicative of how swept away he's become with his work. "I'm glad everything worked out for you, Mutou. Without you, I don't know where I would be right now."
  112.  
  113. "Nakai, you're the one I should be thanking. I was dying at Yamaku. The job was good, it paid well, but I was suffocating here, I had no room to grow. But with you, you...."
  114.  
  115. He stops, trying to figure out exactly what to say. He shifts and shuffles, nervously pulling at his tie.
  116.  
  117. "I've never been good with words, Nakai, so I'll just say it as straight forward as I can; you reminded me of myself. And when you pushed yourself after you came to Yamaku, it reminded me of all the times I made compromises in my life. So seeing you, I guess it made me reevaluate the place I was in. It made me take a risk. So, yeah, I just want to say thanks. You think I got you your job, but you helped me get my life back. So, yeah...there, I said it."
  118.  
  119. He's not looking at me directly anymore, his attention focused safely elsewhere.
  120.  
  121. I'm touched, but I feel a little sorry for the man, so I just nod. "It's cool, boss."
  122.  
  123. He nods back appreciatively.
  124.  
  125. I turn back towards Nurse who has been watching and smiling to himself the entire time. "Nurse, you look good, as always, you sly devil."
  126. "You don't look so bad yourself, Hisao. A little word of advice; you need to keep your clothes separate from Lilly's; I think you're wearing her skirt."
  127. "It's a kilt, piss off."
  128. "Ooh, touchy about the skirt, are we?"
  129. "I'll have you know I've gotten several compliments tonight on my formal wear," I note with some pride.
  130.  
  131. "And what does Lilly think of it?" he questions.
  132.  
  133. I glare at Nurse. "Never mind what my wife thinks."
  134.  
  135. Mutou chuckles. "How are you and Lilly doing? Your last letter didn't say much."
  136.  
  137. "We're...okay."
  138.  
  139. Nurse looks about to say something, but I keep talking to cut him off. Even after all these years, he's still a little too free for my liking when it comes to sharing personal information.
  140.  
  141. It's not that I don't want Mutou to know about our trouble having a child, I've made mention of it in our letters back and forth, but I don't want to share it in this atmosphere, with people well within earshot of us.
  142.  
  143. "We're doing fine. A little trouble, I mentioned that last time. But we're doing better."
  144.  
  145. Mutou nods, backing off from the subject tactfully. Nurse does likewise. It's not something I really want to talk about right now and they can tell.
  146.  
  147. "So, Nurse," I say to smooth over the conversation, "how are you doing? All alone here?"
  148.  
  149. He shakes his head. "No, not at all. Emi's here, of course."
  150. "Where has she been? I haven't seen her yet tonight."
  151. "Last I saw she was at the desert table."
  152. "Oh," I lament, "she's going to be a pain the next few days."
  153. "You're telling me," Nurse adds.
  154. I wince. "Is she still giving you trouble?"
  155. Nurse shrugs. "Yeah, she is."
  156.  
  157. Mutou looks back and forth between us. "Trouble? What do you mean?"
  158.  
  159. I hesitate, looking at Nurse for his cue. He shrugs again, giving up the point. "Emi and I haven't been on the best of terms lately."
  160. "What did you do?" Mutou asks.
  161. "Why do you assume it's my fault?" Nurse says, sounding a little offended.
  162. "When I still worked here, it always was your fault. Every night we went out to get drinks, if we got in trouble, it was because of something you did."
  163. "That's not true!"
  164. "How many times did we get kicked out of a bar because you tried to use the, 'Don't worry, ma'am, I'm a Doctor,' line?"
  165.  
  166. I groan in distaste. "Why does that sound exactly like something you would do?"
  167.  
  168. It seems to piss him off because he looks perturbed. "Well, this time it isn't my fault. Come on, Hisao, back me up here!"
  169.  
  170. "It's true," I explain to Mutou, "it really isn't his fault. Nurse here wants to propose to Meiko, but Emi won't let him."
  171.  
  172. Mutou looks both surprised and pleased by the news. "Well, congratulations, Nurse!"
  173. "Don't congratulate me just yet. I still haven't even asked her."
  174. "Is Meiko here tonight too?"
  175.  
  176. Nurse nods and turns around, looking through the party. He points momentarily at a tiny group.
  177.  
  178. I look around Nurse's shoulder and Mutou does the same. I imagine we both have the same look on our faces when we find Emi's mother.
  179.  
  180. "Wow...." Mutou exclaims.
  181.  
  182. "That is a very tiny dress," I add.
  183.  
  184. Nurse is watching us watch Meiko across the party floor, a small group of men gathered around her in a swarming pack like wolves around the kill.
  185.  
  186. "That's my date!" Nurse states proudly.
  187.  
  188. Mutou turns back to Nurse, again loosening his collar. "Ms. Ibarazaki always was a very handsome woman."
  189.  
  190. I turn towards Mutou, sneaking one last look at Emi's Mom. "'Handsome'? That's what you call 'handsome'? No, Mutou, I'm handsome on a good day. This kilt is handsome. Nurse here is a very handsome man, not that I would notice. That, that is...that is more than just 'handsome'."
  191.  
  192. I look back for another gander, pondering how Ms. Ibarazaki got into that tiny black tube of silk.
  193.  
  194. Nurse has the goofiest smile on his face. "I know, right?"
  195.  
  196. "You're not married to that yet?" Mutou asks. "You'd better hurry. I don't think those gentlemen around her will wait for you to pop the question."
  197.  
  198. Nurse chuckles. "Yeah, I'm not worried. If Emi won't let me ask, then those guys don't stand a chance."
  199.  
  200. I look at Nurse and he seems just a little sad. "You really want to ask her, don't you?"
  201.  
  202. Nurse shrugs and reaches into his pocket, pulling out a tiny black box, a familiar token to any man who's been married.
  203.  
  204. "What do you think?" he says, putting it quickly back.
  205.  
  206. "Sorry, Nurse," I say. "I know how stubborn Emi can get when it comes to her Mom. Listen, you want me to talk to her sometime, maybe try and get her to ease up?"
  207.  
  208. Nurse looks panicked for a moment. "Don't do that! You try and talk to her and she'll think I sent you to butter her up!" He shrugs helplessly. "I'll figure it out in good time, I guess."
  209.  
  210. We give him nods of encouragement in the hopes that everything ends up working out all right. A waitress passes us by and dispenses several glasses to us before scurrying away.
  211.  
  212. "So, Mutou," I ask, holding a glass of wine, but not drinking, "you're the only one left. If you don't mind me asking, how has your family been?"
  213.  
  214. Mutou looks unsure, his mouth working to find the words. "Well, my son is doing fine, from what I can tell."
  215.  
  216. "Have you seen him recently?"
  217.  
  218. He pauses, then sighs. "No, not in a few years, but he says he wants to get together soon and catch up. We've talked more in the past few months than we have the last several years. My former wife isn't thrilled about that, but my son says he doesn't care what she wants anymore once he moves out of her house."
  219.  
  220. I nod, a little pained to hear that his family situation hasn't changed much since the last time he worked up the nerve to talk about his personal life with me.
  221.  
  222. "What is your son doing?"
  223.  
  224. Mutou has a little smile on his face. "Funnily enough, he seems to have his whole life planned out for himself. He wants to join the Ministry of The Environment. He wants to work in a national park, he's really into the environment and activism."
  225.  
  226. "Good for him."
  227.  
  228. He nods slightly. "Yeah, I guess it is. I just would have liked, I don't know, for my son to have gotten into something I had an interest in, maybe follow in my footsteps. Sort of like you."
  229.  
  230. I swallow the lump forming in my throat.
  231.  
  232. "Thanks, boss. But don't sound so disappointed, it sounds like your son has his own idea of what he wants to do. Remember what Theodore Roszack said?"
  233.  
  234. Mutou looks lost for a minute, then smile and nods. "I see what you mean."
  235.  
  236. Nurse doesn't follow along with us. "Help out the poor guy who only has a PHD here, why don't you?"
  237.  
  238. "Theodore Roszack said," Mutou explains, "that 'nature composes some of her loveliest poems for the microscope and the telescope.' It's something Nakai and I talked about in a few of our letters."
  239.  
  240. "And that means what exactly?"
  241.  
  242. "It means," I add, "that there is a wondrous diversity in nature and that through observation and deduction, these things can be explored and fully appreciated, that nature was mankind's first laboratory. Mutou, it sounds to me that your son is following right in your footsteps."
  243.  
  244. There's a warmth to Mutou's face when he responds. "Thank you, Nakai. I guess so."
  245.  
  246. Nurse takes his glass, swirling the wine within it a few times. "I sometimes forget that you're not just a geek, Hisao."
  247.  
  248. "Thanks, Nurse, I appreciate knowing that I'm not spiritually bankrupt."
  249.  
  250. "Spiritual, huh?" he teases. "I thought you didn't care for religion?"
  251.  
  252. "It's not that I don't care for it, I simply refuse to talk about it. Lilly's Father left me with a very bad taste in my mouth when it comes to religion. I don't like talking about it with friends and I don't talk about politics or money with anyone. Why do you think I dislike the Foundation so much?"
  253.  
  254. "They pay the bills," Nurse points out.
  255.  
  256. "Don't remind me," I moan, taking my first sip of wine for the night.
  257.  
  258. "Well, better change that attitude real fast, right? You're the one on the hot seat later."
  259.  
  260. "You know about that, huh?"
  261.  
  262. "Oh yeah, I'm looking forward to what you have in store for the bosses."
  263.  
  264. "The Foundation asked you to do something, Nakai?" Mutou cuts in.
  265.  
  266. "No," I groan, "it was Shizune and Misha."
  267.  
  268. Mutou winces. "Those girls, are they still bothering you?"
  269.  
  270. "Every day of my life!" I gripe. "They are the eagle to my Prometheus, the rock to my Sisyphus! I have dreams that I'm Orestes pursued by mute and pink haired Furies!"
  271.  
  272. "That's enough mythology for one night!" Mutou pleads. "Just don't do anything that will get you in trouble."
  273.  
  274. I reach into the pocket of my jacket and show them a small thumb drive which I twist in the air menacingly.
  275.  
  276. "Oh, I'm gonna get in plenty of trouble, but it'll be well worth it. I've got a little surprise planned for Shizune. Not only will she never see it coming, but I'll finally be able to say I got one over on her."
  277.  
  278. They both look worried and I try to alleviate their concerns. "Calm down, guys, I'm not going to do something stupid. Just a little dramatics that will get her attention."
  279.  
  280. I realize I've gotten carried away talking with the two of them and have forgotten what I had originally been looking for. "By the way, did either of you guys see Kenji running around?"
  281.  
  282. Mutou shakes his head. "Kenji Setou? No, I haven't seen him. Is he actually here?"
  283.  
  284. "Yeah, I was looking for him. Nurse, you seen Kenji?"
  285.  
  286. "Nah," Nurse says, "I haven't seen the spaz either. Why are you looking for four-eyes?"
  287.  
  288. "I need to talk to him about something right away. Listen, I'm sorry, guys, but I have to get going."
  289.  
  290. "That's all right, Nakai. It was good to see you again."
  291.  
  292. "I'll make it up to you, boss. How long are you in town?"
  293.  
  294. "For the next week or so."
  295.  
  296. I turn to Nurse. "Want to set up a card game? Have a couple hands and some drinks?"
  297.  
  298. Nurse nods eagerly. "Sounds great! Invite Kenji, he's got a good tell!"
  299.  
  300. "Mutou, are you up for a game?" I ask.
  301.  
  302. "I could go for a few hands between friends."
  303.  
  304. "Great! I'll find you guys later and we'll work it out."
  305.  
  306. I turn to walk away, but look back towards Mutou.
  307.  
  308. "It was really nice to see you again, Sir."
  309.  
  310. "Don't worry, Hisao, we'll talk more shop later. And knock it off with that 'Sir' stuff."
  311.  
  312. "You're the boss."
  313.  
  314. ----------------------------------------
  315.  
  316. My search ends up being fruitless, Kenji is nowhere to be seen. I'm amazed by how hard it is to play hide-and-go-seek with a half blind target.
  317.  
  318. Stressed out and about to give up, I find myself back at the bar, nervously gripping a fresh glass of wine.
  319. I said I wasn't going to drink tonight, but it seems I've already broken that promise to myself. I can already feel my cheeks getting warm and the alcohol is starting to make me feel pretty good despite my predicament
  320.  
  321. The buzzing conversations continue all around me, and I rub my temples to try and get the pounding headache beginning to worm its way into my brain to cease.
  322.  
  323. I don't even know what I'm going to say when I finally catch up to Kenji. I'm not even sure what he's thinking right now.
  324.  
  325. It can't be anything good, that's for sure.
  326.  
  327. A hand is placed on my shoulder and I turn around to find Miki attached to it. "Hey, there. You okay?"
  328.  
  329. I smile and wave her concern off. "Yeah, I'm fine. Sorry I ran off like that earlier."
  330.  
  331. Miki shrugs. "It's all right."
  332.  
  333. She looks a little nervous, a new attitude for the girl who's always so bright and confident. "Did you talk to Kenji yet? He seemed pretty shook up...."
  334.  
  335. "No, I couldn't find him. Got a little sidetracked, but I haven't been able to catch up too him."
  336.  
  337. Miki rubs the end of her arm, a nervous tell I recall from years ago.
  338.  
  339. "Listen, Kenji running off, it wasn't my fault was it? I mean, I didn't even know you were married, it was just flirting between old friends, right? I know I get carried away some times, but I didn't mean anything by it. I'm sorry if I caused a problem between the two of you."
  340.  
  341. "No, Miki, it really wasn't anything you did. Kenji and I, well, we have some stuff to talk about."
  342.  
  343. "I tried to find him after you disappeared. Two people can cover more ground, right? I caught a glimpse of him and I think I figured out what may be bugging him."
  344.  
  345. A stab of panic runs through my chest and my heart picks up a higher tempo. "Oh, what's that?"
  346.  
  347. Miki turns around, then looks confused when she finds the space behind her empty. She huffs a bit before turning back towards me. "I'll be right back."
  348.  
  349. She walks to a nearby tree and talks to someone behind it for a few moments. She has a cute look of frustration before reaching with one hand and dragging the person out from hiding.
  350.  
  351. This is an unexpected turn of events, I think to myself.
  352.  
  353. Long red hair, green eyes, cute freckles, intellectual glasses; more than enough to send Kenji running for the hills.
  354.  
  355. "H-hello, Hisao," the woman says, waving shyly.
  356.  
  357. I laugh a little nervously. "Hello, Yuuko. I'm surprised to see you here."
  358.  
  359. She lets loose a little sound of surprise and shock. "I-I'm supposed to be here! I mean, I was invited, I promise! I have my invitation right here!" She begins to frantically dig into her purse trying to find the proof she belongs.
  360.  
  361. I try to calm her down. "Yuuko, I wasn't doubting you belonged here, I already met a few of the old faculty. I was just saying I wasn't expecting to see you tonight."
  362.  
  363. "Well," she stammers, "I wasn't really a member of the faculty, really. I was, more like, just an intern, sort of."
  364.  
  365. I smile lightly to try and put her at ease. "If anyone deserves an invitation to tonight, Yuuko, it would be you. You did more work than most of the teachers at Yamaku ever did."
  366.  
  367. She shrugs helplessly, seemingly uncomfortable with my compliment. "I don't think that's true." She smiles shyly. "But thanks for saying it, anyway."
  368.  
  369. She still looks a bit uneasy, shuffling from side to side and tugging at her dress, aware of just how out of place she looks with all the glamor around. Her dress is pretty, if a bit plain, just a black evening gown that could be worn to any number of occasions that require a bit more demanding dress code. Other than a pair of simple, teardrop earrings, she doesn't have any jewelry on either.
  370.  
  371. I try to relieve the tension a bit, seeing Miki give me a little encouraging nod to get me to say something. "So, Yuuko, how have you been? I'm surprised to see you in Japan, last I heard you were living in Greece."
  372.  
  373. She shrugs again. "I've been okay, I guess. I did some work at a museum while I was in Europe." She looks downcast. "It was terrible!"
  374.  
  375. "It couldn't have been that bad!" Miki says, trying to cheer her up.
  376.  
  377. "Do you know what they had me do there?"
  378.  
  379. "What?" I ask.
  380.  
  381. Yuuko drops her eyes and whispers despondently. "They put me in charge of their library...."
  382.  
  383. Miki's eyes go wide and for a moment she looks somewhere half-way between laughing and wrapping a sympathetic hug around Yuuko.
  384.  
  385. "You did do some work you enjoyed, right?" I test.
  386.  
  387. Yuuko thinks about it for a minute. "Well, I spent a few summers at a couple dig sites in Athens."
  388.  
  389. There's a hint of a smile blooming on her face now, a touching expression that melts the awkward cocoon around her. "It was fun. I really enjoyed my time doing that."
  390.  
  391. "Well, it sounds like you have a knack for field work, then. If that's the case, what are you doing back in Japan?"
  392.  
  393. Again, she shrugs, a habitual expression for her, every use an unnecessary apology. "I only wanted a few years experience in the field and abroad. I always planned on coming back to Japan. I'm in the middle of jobs right now."
  394.  
  395. "Well, have you given any thought to teaching? I could put a good word in for you here at Yamaku."
  396.  
  397. Yuuko's eyes go wide and she has a panicked look that crosses her face. "No! Please, no!"
  398.  
  399. She stammers and stutters, trying to find a more reasonable explanation. "Sorry! I'm sorry! I mean, I appreciate it, Hisao, I really do, but...working here again, I don't think I would like that. I don't think I could handle it! It would feel like I was going backwards, even if I was a teacher and not a librarian. Anyway, I'm having an interview with the museum in the city and it looks promising."
  400.  
  401. "Glad to hear, Yuuko. Either way, I know a few people who work at there as well. I'd be happy to talk to them for you there as well if you'd like."
  402.  
  403. She smiles again, genuinely appreciative. "Thank you, Hisao."
  404.  
  405. Her smile vanishes.
  406.  
  407. "What's wrong?" I ask.
  408.  
  409. Her eyes dart away and looks towards nothing I can see. "Have...have you seen Kenji?"
  410.  
  411. I suppress the hiss of disappointment under my breath. "I did earlier, Yuuko, but not recently. I'm sorry."
  412.  
  413. Miki has a sad look on her face, her eyes filled with sympathy for Yuuko "I went out near the parking lot and I found Yuuko there. Kenji was there, as well."
  414.  
  415. Yuuko looks away and tugs nervously at the strap of her little purse. "I wanted to say 'hello'. We hadn't seen each other in so long, I thought maybe we could catch up...."
  416.  
  417. "Kenji looked like someone had ran him over with a train," Miki adds. "When I showed up, he used me as a distraction. He screamed, did this weird sort of backwards roll-crawl somersault thing and the next thing I know he's hopped a security fence and ran into the school!"
  418.  
  419. "He ran off again, huh?" I say. "You said he went into Yamaku?"
  420.  
  421. Miki nods in affirmation.
  422.  
  423. The whole school should be locked up for the party. No wonder I didn't find him, I was looking in the wrongs places.
  424.  
  425. Realization hits me and I know exactly where to find Kenji.
  426.  
  427. "Would you excuse me, I think I know where he's hiding."
  428.  
  429. I turn to leave but Yuuko grabs my arm and stops me. "Hisao!"
  430.  
  431. I turn back to her and she flinches away. "Sorry! I didn't mean to grab you, I'm sorry!"
  432.  
  433. "Yuuko, it's okay. What is it?"
  434.  
  435. She fidgets for a while. "Could you tell him, tell him that I...really, really want to see him again, please?"
  436.  
  437. A twinge builds up in my chest. "Yeah, I will, Yuuko. I'll tell him."
  438.  
  439. She smiles again, a painful expression to see. "Thank you, Hisao...."
  440.  
  441. Yuuko walks away, holding tightly to her purse, her head down.
  442.  
  443. Miki looks displeased, hand on her hip. She growls when Yuuko is out of hearing range.
  444.  
  445. "Kenji is a moron!"
  446.  
  447. "Yeah," I add. "He sure is."
  448.  
  449. I turn to leave and Miki follows after. We leave the party, heading to the nearest door into the school, locked tight for the evening's festivities, the halls and classrooms off limits to non-faculty. I fish a key out of my pocket and unlock the door.
  450.  
  451. Miki makes a move to follow after me, but I halt her. "Sorry, Miki, only school employees are allowed inside after hours."
  452.  
  453. "Bullshit!" she responds. "If you think I'm letting Kenji get away with this, you're as stupid as he is!"
  454.  
  455. "Miki, this is something I have to talk to Kenji alone about."
  456.  
  457. Miki gives me a hard look, her eyes set into angry and fighting readiness. "What's the deal with the two of you guys? This isn't just about Yuuko, is it? What's going on here, Hisao, I don't like being left out of things!"
  458.  
  459. "Nothing is going on, Miki."
  460.  
  461. "Liar!"
  462.  
  463. I wince and she sees it, suspicion growing on her face. "This doesn't have anything to do with me and you flirting, does it? What are you guys, secret queer or something?"
  464.  
  465. "Absolutely not, God damn, Miki! Don't say something like that!"
  466.  
  467. She chews her words for a while, her face growing concerned. She hesitates, her voice lowering. "Is it what I said about you and Hanako?"
  468.  
  469. Panic again stabs through my chest.
  470.  
  471. "It is, isn't it?" she continues.
  472.  
  473. Miki locks eyes with me, like she's trying to see through to the back of my skull. She takes a half step away from me and her shoulders go tense. "What are you doing, Hisao? What's going on between you and Hanako?"
  474.  
  475. I grind my teeth and shut the door behind me, facing Miki head on. "It's not what you're thinking, I can tell you that! And it's not what Kenji is thinking either, okay? Just drop it, please!"
  476.  
  477. Miki doesn't look like she believes me. She lowers her voice to a hiss even though we're alone here. "Is something going on between you and Hanako?"
  478.  
  479. Somehow I'm relived by her outright asking me in the way she does. I take a step closer to Miki and she hesitates for a moment, looking like she might run. There's something in her eyes that tells me my answer means a lot more to her than it should, her idea of the type of person I am being shaken by the accusation or the merest suggestion of any wrongdoing on my part.
  480.  
  481. "No," I say. "I would never do that to Lilly. I love her more than anything in the world, Miki. Lilly is...Lilly is my everything, all right? Hanako and I are not doing anything Lilly wouldn't approve of. She's our best friend and there is absolutely nothing shameful going on between me and her. I can't say anything more, I'm sorry. You'll just have to trust that what I'm telling you is the truth."
  482.  
  483. Everything I'm saying is true and I believe it. I may be concerned about it, but I am not ashamed of what Lilly and I have with Hanako.
  484.  
  485. Miki locks eyes with me, her cute little mouth set in a grim line. The two of us stand against the other, squared off, like two fighters about to go ten rounds. The tension makes me want to sweat and my heart pounds dangerously loud in my chest.
  486.  
  487. Without preamble, Miki sighs and smiles. "Good! Because if there was something going on, Hisao, I would be very disappointed in you and I'd have to kick your ass! I like to think there are still a few decent men out there in the world and that you're one of them."
  488.  
  489. She puts her hand on her hip, a look of real and sincere concern on her face. "If you need to talk to Kenji alone, fine, I'll butt out. Just...try and get him to talk to Yuuko, okay? It would mean a lot to her, you know?"
  490.  
  491. "I will, Miki, I'll try."
  492.  
  493. "Good! Don't you dare let me down!"
  494.  
  495. Miki turns to walk away, looking back at me over her shoulder. "If you'll excuse me, I'm going to see if any of these rich, old guys on the Yamaku Foundation want to see how the student body has matured over the years."
  496.  
  497. She starts to saunter away, a little curl to her hip movements.
  498.  
  499. "Hey, Miki!" I call to her before she gets too far.
  500.  
  501. She turns to face me. "What is it? You're burning valuable drinking time!"
  502.  
  503. I smile. "When are you going to drop the tomboy-party girl act? It's getting old."
  504.  
  505. Miki blinks a few times, stunned. She smiles back at me, a little sadly. "So am I, Hisao. And as long as I have to," she says. "A girl has to protect herself, right?"
  506.  
  507. "Well, don't guard yourself too much," I tell her. "I'd like to hear you end up being happy."
  508.  
  509. Her smile is very sad now. "So would I, Hisao."
  510.  
  511. She stops for a moment and then takes a few steps back towards me, putting her hand on my face and kissing me on the cheek. "You're a great guy, Hisao. Lilly is lucky to have a man like you in her life."
  512.  
  513. I never imagined I'd end up hearing sincerity like that from her and it makes me feel embarrassed, far more than the kiss could make me feel.
  514.  
  515. "Thank you, Miki. You take care of yourself, okay?"
  516.  
  517. "I always do."
  518.  
  519. She winks, the mask coming back on in an instant. "And don't forget to make Kenji talk to Yuuko!"
  520.  
  521. I nod. "Don't worry, Miki. I'll get Kenji down off this roof even if it kills me."
  522.  
  523. ----------------------------------------
  524.  
  525. I hope I'm wrong. Maybe Kenji doesn't suspect anything, maybe he didn't put two and two together. I mean, he was acting pretty weird during our conversation with Miki.
  526.  
  527. He thought he had heard something, a voice. Maybe he overheard Yuuko and that's why he bolted.
  528.  
  529. It's a more manageable scenario for me at least than explaining what Lilly, Hanako and myself have gotten into. All he needs is for me to talk him down, maybe I can even convince him to talk with Yuuko, that it would be good for him.
  530.  
  531. A shiver runs up my back.
  532.  
  533. It's scary how Yamaku can change at night. A place that should be filled with young people and their voices, the flurry of activity and the thrill of learning can be unnaturally still and silent when the sun goes down or when school is out for vacation. Since it's both at the same time, the halls have a keenly disturbing presence.
  534.  
  535. The empty spaces left behind by children always have the most 'wrong' feeling to them.
  536.  
  537. My footsteps echo as I take the old stairs two at a time to my classroom on a little detour.
  538.  
  539. Outside, I can hear the far away drone of music and voices and it only adds to my apprehension, the sounds of ghosts from far away just on the edge of hearing. A banner made by the student council flutters in the hall, telling me to enjoy my vacation.
  540.  
  541. I get the feeling I'm being watched and I stop, turning to look behind me. The hall is empty except for shadows and the moonlight streaming through the picture windows, but I can't shake the feeling I'm not alone.
  542.  
  543. "Hello?" I call out. "If it's who I think it is, I'm not in the mood for any games right now."
  544.  
  545. No answer.
  546.  
  547. I must actually be alone, I think. I'm glad for that, I don't want to deal with ghosts right now.
  548.  
  549. I turn around and find myself staring into a huge leering face that looks down upon me, eyes wide and dead, lips parted slightly in a sinister grimace.
  550.  
  551. I cry out and jump back, my heart leaping in my chest and bashing against my ribcage violently.
  552.  
  553. I push up against the wall on the opposite side of the hall, hand over my chest, gasping for air.
  554.  
  555. The face doesn't move, just continues to stare impassively within it's frame as it has for years.
  556.  
  557. I hate that stupid painting.
  558.  
  559. I feel a little sick to my stomach and I walk down the hall at a double march. I unlock the door to 3-3 and check my desk, removing from a locked drawer a flask I keep hidden under several stacks of papers, a gift from Kenji at my wedding. I think I'll be needing it for the conversation ahead. I slip it into a convenient pouch on the kilt Akira gave me.
  560.  
  561. Locking the classroom behind me, I head down the hallway, stepping only on the dark tiles as I go. It's been a while since I was last up there, but the way to the roof is still very fresh in my mind.
  562.  
  563. The abandoned stairwell is as dusty as it always has been and the lock is still broken. I know I really should report it and get the thing fixed, but I would feel guilty denying the students the opportunity to appreciate the view I enjoyed when I had my lunches on the rooftop, not to mention the possibility of the memories made up there as well.
  564.  
  565. The door screeches in protest as I open it and the cool night air rushes around me. Stars glitter above and there's a slight glow coming up to the roof from the party down below. The gravel crunches under my feet and I take a breath of night air, the chill cooling my lungs.
  566.  
  567. He's leaning against the fence, one hand loosely gripping a bottle of wine, the other laced between the chain links, two more bottles laying at his feet, one of them on it's side, empty.
  568.  
  569. "Hello, Kenji. Where did you get the wine?"
  570.  
  571. He doesn't stir when I call him, he just keeps staring down at the party below, slightly lifting the bottle is a half-hearted salute. His bow tie has been undone and hangs off his shoulders, his shirt collar unbuttoned, jacket and white opera scarf thrown carelessly onto a nearby bench.
  572.  
  573. I walk up and join him at the fence, looking down at the lights and sounds below.
  574.  
  575. "I stole it from the bar. I'm an expert in the art of stealth and escape, didn't you know that?"
  576.  
  577. "I recall. Are you having a good evening so far?"
  578.  
  579. He shrugs and lifts the bottle slightly in his limp grip. "Yeah, can't you tell?"
  580.  
  581. I unscrew the top and hold the flask out towards him. "Don't drink that girly crap. Here, have some of this."
  582.  
  583. His eyes are bleary behind the thick, coke-bottle lenses he wears. He snatches the flask from me in his free hand and draws a long drink from it.
  584.  
  585. I wince, thinking about the mixing of wine and Scotch together, an unpleasant brew I imagine. Call me a purest, but if you drink anything, don't mix it up, it ruins the experience. A splash of water can do wonders for Scotch, but anything else should be considered blasphemy.
  586.  
  587. Kenji pulls the flask from his lips and looks at it carefully. "This is the one I gave you for your wedding, right?"
  588.  
  589. "Yeah, it is."
  590.  
  591. He laughs and the sound makes me worried.
  592.  
  593. He hands it back to me and I take a swig for myself, the drink burning my throat and warming my lungs back up before stowing it once more in it's pouch.
  594.  
  595. "So, Kenji," I ask carefully, "is there anything you'd like to talk to me about?"
  596.  
  597. He shrugs, not answering, just continuing to stare down at the party, the man outside always looking in.
  598.  
  599. "Listen, I talked with Yuuko and...."
  600.  
  601. "Don't!" he hisses loudly, his whole body going tense, still looking away from me. "Don't say her name! You're not allowed to talk about her!"
  602.  
  603. I clamp my mouth shut. "Sorry. I forgot."
  604.  
  605. We go back to the silence from before.
  606.  
  607. This is not going well, I think.
  608.  
  609. "Listen, Kenji, I know how you feel, okay?"
  610.  
  611. "Do you?" he says, "do you really? How could you possibly know how I feel about this? You have your perfect little marriage and your perfect job and your perfect life. You couldn't possibly understand."
  612.  
  613. "Hey, that's not fair, you know very well that everything isn't going 'perfect' for me right now, okay? You know the trouble Lilly and I have been through, I've talked to you about this."
  614.  
  615. "Yeah," he says, taking a drag from the wine bottle, "and you found a way to take your mind off your little problem, right?"
  616.  
  617. I wince. "You don't know what you're talking about...."
  618.  
  619. "I think I do!" he says, turning towards me, the movement sluggish and sloppy. "Or did you not mean any of that stuff you were talking about? How bout' I remind you what you said!? 'I think I'm falling in love with Hanako!', 'I think something's wrong with me!", 'How can I feel this way about our best friend?' does that ring any bells!?"
  620.  
  621. "Hey!" I shout, stepping towards him and pulling him away from the fence edge, towards the middle of the roof. "That was said in confidence! Keep your voice down, this isn't Manly Picnic! You don't talk about that stuff outside Picnic!"
  622.  
  623. "Well what are we waiting for, huh!?" he says, spreading his arms wide, sloshing the bottle of wine in his grip.
  624. "We're on the rooftop, you've got some whiskey, let's have a picnic, Hisao! Let's talk about it! The last time few times we hung out together, you told me all about you and Lilly trying to have a kid! What, did you get tired of trying and move onto Hanako?"
  625.  
  626. Heat rises in my chest and my throat burns. "You're talking out of your ass, Kenji! You're drunk and angry about...about her! This has nothing to do with me!"
  627.  
  628. He wobbles on his feet for a moment before regaining his balance. "Did you sleep with Hanako?" he shouts.
  629.  
  630. I grip my fists tightly.
  631.  
  632. I can defuse this, I know I can.
  633.  
  634. I try to respond as calmly as possible. "No, I did not."
  635.  
  636. Kenji hurls the bottle against the utility shed, smashing it against the concrete and sending red all over. "Holy shit, you did! You liar! You slept with her! What the fuck is wrong with you!?"
  637.  
  638. "Keep it down, damn it!" I hiss, "I don't want people hearing you say that!"
  639.  
  640. He goes on, ignoring me and building steam. "What is wrong with you? You...you have a perfect wife! A perfect life! And you're throwing it all away? What is wrong with you, you jerk? Do you think you'll keep your job after this? Do you ever think about anyone but yourself? What about Lilly? Hell, you're sleeping with her best friend! Hanako lives in the same house as the two of you, what is wrong with you!?"
  641.  
  642. "You don't know the whole situation!"
  643.  
  644. "What, you tripped and fell into her repeatedly!?"
  645.  
  646. "Hey!"
  647.  
  648. I grab Kenji by the collar and shake him hard. "Don't talk about Hanako like that, that isn't what happened! You wouldn't understand!"
  649.  
  650. "I understand plenty!"
  651. He shakes me off of him and staggers back. "You've had everything just handed to you on a silver platter and now that it gets a little hard you decide to take the easy option, huh? A little trouble having a kid, why not just try the next one and see how that works, you slime! You sleaze!"
  652.  
  653. That old monster of mine, my temper, bursts forth and I push Kenji hard, slamming him against the shed.
  654. "How dare you, you little bastard! I have had to fight for every day of my life knowing that I could die and it would be the last time I ever see Lilly! Don't you dare think you know what the two of us have had to go through! You know full well what I've been through, what the two of us have been through! I almost died trying to keep her! Her Father made my life a living hell! He nearly killed me! You have no right to judge me! I'm sick of you blaming everyone but yourself for your own problems! I'm sick of carrying you around!"
  655.  
  656. "I'm sick of being in your shadow!" he yells back.
  657. "Every day you walk around with your perfect life! I'm sick of being your sidekick, your comic relief! You've got a beautiful woman who loves you and you're throwing it all away and what do I have!? Nothing!"
  658.  
  659. "Who's fault is that, Kenji, huh? Mine? It's not my fault you can't stand the sound of her name! You want to be jealous of me, fine! Go ahead, I can't stop you, but don't act like your problems are my fault! Your choices are your own, not mine! You made this bed, now lie in it!"
  660.  
  661. He pushes off the shed and is in my face close enough that I can smell the wine on his breath.
  662. "You want to talk about choices? Tell me how you came to the choice to sleep with your wife's best friend!? How did you come up with that bright idea, science man!?"
  663.  
  664. "You don't know the situation!"
  665.  
  666. "Then explain it to me! You're a teacher, educate me!"
  667.  
  668. I try to put it into words, but I just don't know how to.
  669.  
  670. "You don't have anything to say?" he continues.
  671. "Figures! And you think I'm the impulsive one? What are you going to do when Lilly finds out, because you sure as hell know she'll find out sooner or later! When she learns you're cheating on her, it's over!"
  672.  
  673. "I am not cheating on Lilly, I would never do that!"
  674.  
  675. "Then what do you call sleeping with a woman who isn't your wife?"
  676.  
  677. "You wouldn't understand!"
  678.  
  679. "You keep saying that! Try me! What are you going to tell her, huh? It'll kill her! She's the most devoted woman on the planet and you're lying to her!"
  680.  
  681. "No, I'm not, she already knows!"
  682.  
  683. "What!?"
  684.  
  685. "Lilly knows, Kenji! She was there!"
  686.  
  687. "You slept with Hanako while she was in the house? She's blind, not stupid, you bastard!"
  688.  
  689. "No, you asshole, she was there! In the room! In the bed! We slept together! All of us! Together, okay? You want a picture? We love each other, you dumb fuck!"
  690.  
  691. Kenji goes still for a moment, his brain trying to process everything I just said.
  692.  
  693. I'm panting for breath, my heart screaming in my chest.
  694.  
  695. I just let loose the biggest secret in my life and I instantly regret it.
  696. I shouldn't have said that, I shouldn't have come up here. I should have let Kenji just rot all by himself.
  697.  
  698. He looks shocked and confused before he begins to react to my words.
  699.  
  700. "Oh."
  701.  
  702. His jaw sets into a hard line and his teeth grind together.
  703.  
  704. "Oh! Of course! Of course! Because Hisao Nakai always gets the happy ending! Hisao Nakai always gets what he wants! He always gets the girl! He doesn't just get the woman of his dreams, he gets the consolation prize too! He gets whatever he wants because his life is so fucking perfect!"
  705.  
  706. "Don't act like this was just my doing! Lilly loves Hanako as much as I do! I told you you wouldn't understand! What does it matter to you what we do? Why should I care what you think about what happens between the three of us? What does it matter to you?"
  707.  
  708. "Because I love her!"
  709.  
  710. Silence dominates the rooftop, the confession sending me rocking back on my feet.
  711.  
  712. It's my turn to take a few moments to collect myself.
  713.  
  714. My heart goes from one-hundred kilometers per hour to a dead stop in a second flat. The words are big enough that I need to take a few steps away and give them room to breathe.
  715.  
  716. "You what? You what?"
  717.  
  718. Kenji leans back against the shed, wiping his brow against his sleeve. "I love her, Hisao. I'm in love with Hanako. I haven't said anything to anyone, I was too afraid to admit it. I love her, Hisao."
  719.  
  720. I stare dumbfounded at Kenji, unbelieving.
  721.  
  722. Anger rises in my chest, jealousy and above all else, pure outrage.
  723.  
  724. What the hell does he think he's trying to pull?
  725.  
  726. "No, you don't, you dumnass!"
  727.  
  728. Kenji's mouth drops in shock.
  729. "Who the hell do you think you are telling me what I feel about Hanako?"
  730.  
  731. "I'll tell you who I am! I'm the guy who's spent the last ten years listening to your drunk rants about one woman and one woman only! And I sure as hell can tell you that it wasn't Hanako you ever talked about! Your lying, you jackass! If you love her so much, why didn't you say anything when I told you I loved her, huh?"
  732.  
  733. "I never thought you would actually do anything about it, but I was clearly wrong!"
  734.  
  735. "Bullshit! You think just because you've had lunch with a girl a couple times it means you're in love with her? You're pathetic! The only reason you think you're in love with her is because Hanako is the only unmarried woman you've had a reasonable conversation with in the past decade! This has nothing to do with me or her! You're full of shit! You just can't bring yourself to admit you still love Yuuko!"
  736.  
  737. He pushes me hard and I fall back into the chain link fence.
  738.  
  739. It screeches in protest from my weight.
  740.  
  741. "I told you not to say her name!"
  742.  
  743. "Stop trying to hide from the truth!"
  744.  
  745. I grab Kenji and rip open his collar.
  746.  
  747. He fights back, but I slap his hands aside and reach into his shirt, yanking out a familiar looking scarf I know will be there, yellow striped and faded, old and well loved.
  748.  
  749. I grab the scarf and shove it in his face.
  750. "You can't take it off for one night! Yuuko made this for you and you can't take it off for one night! You still love her, Kenji, not Hanako! You love Yuuko!"
  751.  
  752. He rips it out of my hand and pushes me again, this time harder and I sink into the yielding fence once more.
  753.  
  754. "I don't love her!" he yells.
  755.  
  756. I push against the fence and throw my hands into the air in disgust.
  757. "You know what? Fine! I quite! I'm done! I'm sick of this! I came up here to try and talk you into doing something good for yourself for once, to convince you to talk to the woman you let go, and you come after me? Screw it! You can stay up here and sulk for all I care! Running away is the only thing you've ever been good at!"
  758.  
  759. I turn and start walking back towards the stairwell.
  760.  
  761. "Where are you going?" Kenji shouts after me. "I'm not done yelling at you yet!"
  762.  
  763. "I'm leaving Kenji! I learned a long time ago that when you start ranting, the best thing to do is just ignore you or walk away!"
  764.  
  765. "Don't turn your back on me!"
  766.  
  767. I hear a grunt and something smashes into the wall next to me, causing me to duck in reflex, my hands raised to cover my eyes.
  768.  
  769. The bottle explodes against the wall near my face and peppers me with glass shards and droplets of wine.
  770.  
  771. Stunned, I shake a few fragments of green glass out of my hair and turn towards Kenji, a cold feeling running through my chest.
  772.  
  773. "Did you just throw that bottle at me?"
  774.  
  775. "No, I was aiming for your head!"
  776.  
  777. I take a step towards Kenji, crowding into him.
  778.  
  779. "Apologize."
  780.  
  781. "Screw you!"
  782.  
  783. My heart is starting to race.
  784.  
  785. "Kenji, I'm gonna feel real bad about punching a man in glasses who has delusions of persecution."
  786.  
  787. "No worse than I'll feel beating up a skirt wearing pervert with a gimp heart!"
  788.  
  789. That cold feeling spreads into my limbs and I grab Kenji by the neck.
  790. "You know I hate that word! Satou called me that word! If you want this friendship to survive, you'll take that back right now!"
  791.  
  792. Kenji snarls at me. "This friendship started on this roof, why not end it here?"
  793.  
  794. The two of us stand there for what feels like hours.
  795.  
  796. My pulse pounds in my forehead and the blood is rushing through my ears, a tidal wave of crimson filling my head and making my vision turn red.
  797.  
  798. Kenji pushes me off of him.
  799.  
  800. I push him back.
  801.  
  802. That's when we start fighting.
  803.  
  804. ----------------------------------------
  805.  
  806. Part Three:
  807. http://pastebin.com/cERf2AUz
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