I'm here to talk about this phrase "Check your privilege" I'm sure most of you are familiar with it for all the social justice warriors on instagram or whatever but most the time it seems to be a bit silly to me. I understand some of it but other bits of it really make me roll my eyes. It's almost as the ones that say the phrase probably haven't checked some privilege of their own. I mean for one they sure are whiney sometimes and it makes me wonder if they ever checked their first world problems privilege. Whining cause people supposedly judge you because you're overweight when in fact they judge you cause you wont shut up about how people supposedly judge you instead of doing anything to fix the problem.

Sure some of you are already looking at me and going who is this asshole saying that crap to me? Just hear me out and I'm sure you can at least see that I'm a asshole with a point I'd like to make.

Check your privilege they tell me, sure I acknowledge that I was probably born on second given that I'm male and the big bonus of being white; that I wasn't beaten or abused or even really suffered all that much. Hell, I didn't even get diddled by the creepy guy down the street and truth be told I feel kinda left out after all the other kids got their rides with Chester... last name is probably obvious. But I'm not here about any of that...

There is a type of privilege that hasn't been addressed...

People I would kindly ask that you all check your willpower privilege at the door. Some of us are lucky and know not to go spend money on frivolous things or can't manage to put down our vices.

Willpower privilege is knowing you shouldn't have that 16th beer or that you shouldn't try to bone that skanky chick at the bar after having said 16th beer.

Willpower privilege is not waking up in the morning with terrible hangover and it burning while you pee.

Willpower privilege is actually getting up and going to work every day despite hating it.

Willpower privilege is not getting fired for telling the Human resources person that they are a demon from hell even though they obviously are.

Willpower privilege is not telling children at walmart that their mom is a horrible trainwreck that gave you the clap and a toothy blowjob.

So having said all that I would really appreciate if you would start to check your willpower privilege. Some of us are prone to stupid things and were tired of getting picked on for it.

Who am I kidding? They brought that shit on themselves.

And if you hate me after all that, think I'm a asshole ir whatever... well you might just be right and maybe you should check your not being a dick privilege. Some of us just don't have tact.

Thank you for having me and goodnight!