Life Notes.

I’m still searching for the meaning of life
because the Oxford dictionary definition betrayed me.
Convinced me that life could be categorised into a series of sentences,
maybe that works for prisoners, but I’ve always wanted to be free.
Free like the skies and the sun,
but if I'm a star, then I'm a falling one,
Because I plan to make an impact.

Because life can be confusing
when one of your grandma dies, and your mum and her sister aren't speaking,
so their their literally each sideeying each over the coffin.
Love might aswell just be a 4 letter word on a doctors note that gets prescribed to those that are lonely, way too often.
But when the medicine doesn't make you better, it makes you bitter!
When a love doesn't make you better, it makes you bitter.

She told me nothing lives in her heart anymore
it's a Bando!
Her last lover didn't even thank time to pack his stuff
so his memories are littered all over her flaws.
So give me an average chick over a bad bitch,
Nah that's BS because my wife is fine as hell,
n I got too much love for the coloured girls.
And my cousin wants to be a Kardashian,
that's cool as long as she acknowledges that not every guy is a Kanye West
and that there is very minimal reality shown, in a reality show.
Will she recognise the face in the mirror when the cameras are off?
You try telling a confident 21 year old black woman that perfect doesn’t exist.
That it's merely a figment of our exaggeration.

Are we still chasing the same goals as we did when we were kids?
Back then we made goalposts out of jumpers, stones and sticks and it was still lit
now we shoot for the stars,
never once taking time to admire them.

Maybe life moves fast,
One minute we were in the playpen, then on the playground to the play station to the playboys and the play house.
But we hardly play now, well some of us play the lottery.
My girls mum thinks one day she will win the lottery ,
how do I convince her that with 7 kids she's already won it 7 times.
How can young parents seeing kids as a mistakes, not the negatively impact on how the kids will eventually see themselves.
So we walk around believing that we were never meant to happen,
Like our lives were a mistakes on a test that we were too high to take seriously
Like our lives were a mistakes on a test that they failed
I’m still searching for the familiarity of that red and white stripe, I’m still searching for Waldo, I’m still trying to find Nemo..
…am stil searching for the meaning of life
or is life about searching for meaning.