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By: a guest on Apr 30th, 2012  |  syntax: None  |  size: 2.63 KB  |  hits: 11  |  expires: Never
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  1. I just find every single reason to complain, don't I? I don't need a girl in my life, I need something to take pride in. I tried taking pride in my work and then everyone just either took advantage of me or hated me. I don't have a problem working 10+ hour shifts, but that also caused me to break the fuck down and cry. I need more than just stress relievers. I need to fill that void. I need to feel proud of something. Be it effort I put into getting a girl, or money spent on my car, or SOMETHING. Fucking, something. Maybe I need to work harder to get promoted at work. That'd be greaaaaaaaaat. That might just fill the void and give me a reason to work harder. Or maybe I should start working on my car. Learn how to do the powersteering myself and maybe have Jay's help. Have Jay teach me all the shit about the radio and sound system. I can maybe get somewhere with it. Maybe I just need a new car so I can start fresh. The exterior of the Lexus isn't the greatest, and I'd never be proud of it until front to back inside and out is amazing. If I made the effort to make everything about it look and feel nicer, I'd probably spend most of my 3k that I have.
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  3. I really should stop spending so much money, too. I had my fun. My limit for the hookah is going to be 150, and the powersteering hose is going to blow me another 100 or so. Radio, 80. The speakers are fine, and Jay has a sub I can use, I think?
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  5. I just feel so... empty. I'm not even giving my all to anything anymore. What do I have left?
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  7. This tooth pain is fucking killing me. Even though it's fine now, I'm going to make damn well sure I get it looked at as early as fucking possible. Next Monday should be ideal, if there's space for an appointment.
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  9. A girlfriend would be... or really should be the easiest thing to take pride in. She does all the work once I get her. The problem with me taking pride in anything is I'm afraid of getting hurt. I'm afraid that something is going to ruin my pride and I'm going to be destroyed and unable to repair any of it. If I just stop caring about my pride, well, I'm just in the same exact scenario then. I just wonder what Mark and Jay take pride in now. Or well, even if they need to anymore.
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  11. I can't wait til I'm the age where I don't need to worry about this shit anymore. I just hope I can commit to the whole PhD thing at school or do something productive with my life. Hell, I'd be happy being a GM or Restaurateur of Chipotle or something maybe 70k+ a year. That'd be the easy way out though. Meh.
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  13. Meh.
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  15. In approximately 6 months, I'll be getting another 1400 for financial aid refund. Hopefully that'll bring me up to around 5k between checking and savings.
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